Hello my monger brothers!
I got a PM from a So Cal monger bro who has a fair number of published reviews. He said kgirl admin denied his posting so I'll give it a go... The facts:Monger is not anonymous to booker. Kgirl has a fair number of reviews with TER avg of 8.3. Monger gave score of 6, paid $380 / hr donation but left 20 minutes early. Review laid out the vibe was off and no chemistry, one shot, left 20 minutes early and no repeat. Booker identified monger as said reviewer and angry text to remove said review in order to not damage kgirl's biZ. Monger posed the following questions to me: Question # 1 should / can monger block Booker? Question # 2 is there a Master BL and will I be put on the list if I don't do as requested? Question # 3 can I remove a legit review on TER once published? Question # 4 what repurcussions, if any, can I reasonably expect if I do nothing? Super concerned about BL...
TIA
-- Modified on 12/8/2021 8:40:54 PM
In my experience, the global blacklist is more mythical than real in most cases. Sure, if a monger beats up a girl, that’s going to get around and have a deservedly negative impact on his ability to book anywhere once the word spreads.
I only ever had something like this happen once. It was back when I was new. And it was a c-org that seems to be long gone. I just stopped communicating with the booker and never used the org again. From the fact that they didn’t seem to last long, I’m guessing I wasn’t the only one.
If you’re in SoCal or NorCal, there will always be plenty of reputable orgs to work with.
Though, in the future I would recommend delaying reviews so that it won’t be so easy for people to match you up to a particular visit. I know not everyone agrees on this. But anonymity/privacy is important in the mongering world for many reasons. Primarily for safety, in my mind. There are bad actors in this community. Most times in my experience they have been other mongers. But sometimes they are the girls, the bookers or the orgs. I find it best to just avoid providing the opportunity for some bad actor to identify me in the first place.
And, yes, I get it that some people may never have a bad experience. Good for them. I’ve had a few bad experiences. So have others I’ve known. Minimizing the risk of one of those bad experiences, such as is described above or potentially much worse, seems worth the inconvenience of maintaining my privacy to me. But everyone must make this decision for themselves.
Even on Facebook it is considered good practice to not post vacation pics until you’re returned home. This minimizes the risk of someone using your Facebook entries to identify that your house is empty and ripe for burglary.
So, yeah, the good old passive aggressive behavior of making yourself unavailable and, in this case, difficult to even identify can be very useful. In a community where every single person involved - even the most pro monger among us - is at least to some extent a criminal, caution just makes sense.
-- Modified on 12/9/2021 6:33:35 AM
1. Can you? Sure. Should you? Not if you wanna stick around this scene, no.
2. Yes there's a master BL and nobody knows the answer to that except the booker this guy is dealing with I guess. I imagine this master BL is for dudes that hit/rob/stalk girls/stealth non-bbfs girls, basically the worst of the worst. Hell yeah all these agencies talk to each other.
3. Not to my knowledge, no. It would involve PMing an admin/requesting support and explaining the situation (or a good excuse for why it isn't valid, actually) and requesting they take it down as a favor. But there's no workflow in the TER application for removing a valid published review as a user. However, I know that you CAN for sure get a forum post removed using the same method, ask me how I know... (this is the reason I didn't nominate my own post for Post of the Year Award, BTW....it isn't there anymore haha)
4. Bro chalk it up to the game as a lesson learned. Apologize to the booker and maybe ask them how to take the post down, maybe they'll know and walk him through it. And don't leave bad reviews!! (in my mind - anything less than a 7 is BAD, and even a 7 isn't a good review) this isn't Yelp or Google, this is a small community and you're not only hurting the girls business you're hurting the agency as it makes it look like they bring in busted/low quality girls. If you get a dud, again chalk it up to the game.
I know I am gonna get flamed by a few of you guys for number 4. It is what it is. If this was Germany or a legal country it is a different ballgame. When you are under the radar and on the secret side of things like we are in USA, you play by special rules. You have to respect the girls and agencies for what they are providing us. In my opinion we are all very privileged to be part of and enjoy the kgirl world. You have to show respect.
And hey, duds happen, nobody bats 1.000 ... This is why lots of guys don't TOFTT regularly, and wait for other bros to put the work in and leave reviews etc. This is also the utility of private groups/message chains.
4. Bro chalk it up to the game as a lesson learned. Apologize to the booker and maybe ask them how to take the post down, maybe they'll know and walk him through it. And don't leave bad reviews!! (in my mind - anything less than a 7 is BAD, and even a 7 isn't a good review) this isn't Yelp or Google, this is a small community and you're not only hurting the girls business you're hurting the agency as it makes it look like they bring in busted/low quality girls. If you get a dud, again chalk it up to the game.
I know I am gonna get flamed by a few of you guys for number 4. It is what it is. If this was Germany or a legal country it is a different ballgame. When you are under the radar and on the secret side of things like we are in USA, you play by special rules. You have to respect the girls and agencies for what they are providing us. In my opinion we are all very privileged to be part of and enjoy the kgirl world. You have to show respect.
And hey, duds happen, nobody bats 1.000 ... This is why lots of guys don't TOFTT regularly, and wait for other bros to put the work in and leave reviews etc. This is also the utility of private groups/message chains.
You suggesting negative feedback should only be in private groups renders ter as an advertising website,not a review website. Do you talk shit about girls privately yet publicly you don't rate her negatively? If you get a dud, you keep mum but if you get a gem, you rave about it? That's unfair to consumers. Once again, review site isn't an advertising site.
You talking about respect, but how is apologizing to a booker for writing a truthful review and then trying to take it down at their whim, respectful to fellow mongers? Sounds like if that's the road one is taking, they're at a bookers mercy and just do whatever they tell to do as to not anger them. I believe that is called a policy of appeasement.
-- Modified on 12/9/2021 12:36:47 PM
I do disagree a bit on 1, 2 and 4. But not completely. And I understand your viewpoint.
Contrary to what some would have us believe, most of the time there is no single right answer. Because nearly all of us are basing our answers on our own experience and preferences.
There will be people, and we all know who they are, who will say that their answers are the only right or ethical or whatever possible answers. And they have a right to their opinions. But that’s all any of us have. Just opinions. Absolutely no one can be sure they are completely right. Not in this game anyway.
At the moment that the inevitable negative consequence(s) (earned or not - “earned” being a highly subjective term all by itself in this case) hit us, we each have to look back and be able to say we did what we thought was best/right at the time. It will be small consolation if all we can say is “well, I trusted so and so and did exactly what he said”. The decisions are, and must be, our own.
Sure, we might get lucky and never ever have to face negative consequences for our choices. But I would never bet on a coin coming up heads every time for thousands of consecutive flips. Even though it is possible that someone might win that bet.
So, I completely respect your answers. They seem entirely viable. And do not cause harm to anyone. Might other answers be better in some cases? Maybe. Nobody knows for sure.
I think you make a lot of good contributions here. Keep up the great work.
All the best to you. And have fun.
Except for some people's answers being the only right ones. I don't think anyone on here is making such claims. It's just that when you pick your answer, especially in cases like this one, where there is little to no room for compromise, you align yourself with a certain side. And when you do, own your choice and your answer.
Anyway, what's that Pharcyde line?
"There comes a time in every man's life
When he's gotta handle shit up on his own"
Being aware of the consequences is important. My advices, for example, often entail being confrontational with suppliers. It really depends on where your values lie to make the correct decision for you. How important is your review and what you wrote in it versus how important it is to keep access to other orgs. To me, for example, my convictions and moral beliefs are of utmost importance and they will not budge even if my survival depends on repenting. For most people, survival will trump the convictions. For many, reviews, other mongers come secondary after getting in and staying in the orgs. The choice is yours, as Black Sheep would say. Always a choice. Take what's most important to you, make your choice and own your decision. Many times you won't be able to appease everyone or ride the fence. Those are the situations where you and only you decide what matters more to you.
But that's a different question for the guy to consider.
1) If he gave an objective and not some emotionally driven, condemnation type review and the booker is threatening him yes, he should probably think about blocking the booker. Alternatively (assuming the booker is working with a number of other ladies) he can point out that the issue is with the specific provider and not the bookers services in general and they should consider it a specific situation.
2) Possibly, everyone talks and has some type of back channel/industry type communications.
3) The published review belongs to TER now so unless he admits to submitting a fake review I cannot see how he could get the review pulled. However, and this relates to 1) I suppose, he can tell TER about the threat he has gotten from the booker and see if that booker/agency/number can be banned from TER.
4) Well, he might tell the booker that he has no way to remove the review as TER owns it now.
One takeaway might be that rather then just leaving 20 min early (I'm assuming he says that was his choice) he might have considered contacting the booker from the session to bring up the things he thinks were below expected service levels and his disappointment with the session. Might not change anything but might.
#1 no need to block, good to keep communication open.
#2 it's a small world after all; the Master BL is for rough up, rip offs and unacceptable hygiene.
#3. Papa can you assist with this one?
#4. Bookers come and go. If you're a good customer otherwise, the org may invite you back in the future.
YEMV
Hold up - see other response??!! Kun Gumiho wants to give me another bbbjtcimws so I'll be checking out now....
He he
-- Modified on 12/9/2021 8:33:17 AM
#1 no need to block, good to keep communication open. Jensen's response is better upon reading his response.
#2 it's a small world after all; the Master BL is for rough up, rip offs and unacceptable hygiene.
#3. Answered by brother Jensen.
#4. Bookers come and go. If you're a good customer otherwise, the org may invite you back in the future.
YEMV
1. You don't necessarily have to "block" a booker. You can just ignore the request. In fact, there are a few ways you can go about it. You can lie to the booker that isn't you and you don't know what they're talking about, although I personally wouldn't do it.
Ignoring request would probably be considered less aggressive than outright refusing to do so (no acknowledgement vs negative acknowledgement)
2. Yes, there is a master bl. Bay area has a "wall of shame". It is usually reserved for bad actors. In LA, from what I've heard orgs are more trigger happy and there's a real chance your bl can extend to other orgs. Be prepared for the worst case scenario that standing up for the truth and your review may result in you being unwelcome in many places.
3. Yes, but provider asking for it to be removed isn't a good reason. In fact, it's a good reason to remove the provider/agency from ter. In this case, I'd imagine the org would be even less happy. This is what I would do though. This is behavior that should not be tolerated as it is bullying and detrimental to the whole idea of a review site. If they have done it to you, it is certain they have done it to other people they could identify. This is against ter terms of service and any review site as a whole. Not writing bad reviews devalues the whole point of this site.
4. As I've said, being prepared for worst case scenario is helpful. The question any monger should be able to answer is how worth is your truth/integrity versus the prospect of being shut out entirely. I personally would stand by my opinions; being silenced and bullied into repenting from a bad review is exactly the type of behavior that pisses me off immensely and I would not hesitate to then post the name of the org, name of the booker on every active forum there is. Same goes if they offer to bribe. This is anti-consumer anti-customer behavior. Caving in to their requests will only validate this tactic in their eyes. Don't be cunt behavior enabler.
PS. I'm glad it was twoon and not me who posted this. Maybe this thread will open peoples eyes that this type of shit happens all the time. And it's not just me being obsessed with shitting on orgs for no reason.
-- Modified on 12/9/2021 10:55:01 AM