Why do we settle? We as humans start with good relationship then marriage.  After a few years things are not the same. The love is there but one or the other has lost the lust/passion . The other person just adjusts to the new turn in events. Even if the other brings it up .. it falls on Def ears. So you find other things to do to keep ur mind off of it even have a affair. But nothing fills that feeling u had at the beginning with ur wife/husband.  So we settle. But why?

-- Modified on 5/27/2016 10:53:55 AM

I never settled.. hence I have never been married once... and the last g/f was in 1999...

Well ur 1 of the few. I have never been married either but 2 long term relationship.  1 being 6yrs n the second being 10yrs. But I wouldn't say no to marriage if I knew they were my perfect match. I couldn't live without them. But have never found that. Everyone is nice at the beginning but never stay that way. N 99% of the time I don't need them. They don't provide me anything I can't n don't already provide myself.

The few... the proud... the life long bachelor! I'm 52... Had 4 g/fs in my life.. None lasted more than 6 months.. I dropped 2 and 2 dropped me... So be it... No regrets... I have a better chance of hitting the lottery 3 times vs finding that compatible match.

You know what you want Annie and that's what counts!

Yup but I get to the point that little things bug me about them
Like I us to tell my folks as a little kid. I'm gonna b the old woman on the courted with 100 cats .lol

It is an institution invented by Religion to Control Sexuality.

"In the Beginning"  is the time when the relationship is all "New" and we have our rose-colored glasses on.
It's the time when our brain is fulfilling a Need.
We have turned the person of our desire into a Fantasy.  
Then, one year later, reality shows up.

Why do people "Settle"?
The passionate love turns to friendship.
It's comfortable and people get lazy.  
It's easier to just hire a Passionate Love Fantasy  
and live with your friend.

Sex and Love do not equate.  Over time, everything looses it 'luster' - what makes for a good relationship is a true understanding of each others needs and wants.  This is tough job for both.

I have been married for over 50+ years, and yes, I have enjoyed the 'hobby' during that time - my job took me all over the US and I picked my 'playmates' very carefully (TER being one of the main factors I took into consideration when choosing one), I don't see anything wrong in this.

Anyone in the hobby (provider or client)  will tell you its a business - guys have a hard time understanding that - its never 'love' (on their part) its 'lust'.  Somehow guys think if you marry a provider you get 'freebies' - that is not the basis for a relationship.

You can be open and honest with your wife/girlfriend but there comes a point when you should just keep your mouth shut and go on with life.

There is no such thing as 'cheating' - we are human, seeing another for 'sex' is not a sin, and those who choose to work in this industry make that decision ever before they see their first client.    

A  good relationship is made up of caring for the other in good and bad times - as I stated before, everything looses it luster over time and if one wonders and finds another, chances are they are not relationship material to start with.

There is a lot of guys out there that have no idea what a provider deals with (mentally) - I have had a very long standing relationship with a provider and we both know each other boundaries.  

All you can hope for is to find one who has the same likes and dislikes as you - leave sex out of it (since you both enjoy it), dig deeper and look for the real person

humans, a LTR (not necessarily marriage) becomes comfortable and complacent; so the drive to work at being romantic, giving surprise gifts, spontaneity etc...tapers off and we adapt to the current situation. Another factor may be children, new or lost career, illness etc...that changes the dynamics of the original relationship.  

Bottom line it is human nature.

You have a piint

Ty 4 ur view.  U r correct no one understand what or why a person does what they do or what goes on in there head.