I posted a reply to that thread and mine was directed a tthe question at hand (or what I thought it was). It appeared as though the author had an isue with not recieving a reason for the pass.
It is my opinion that would have been proper to have given him a reason. Although, I do agree entirely that the girl had every right to pass (for whatever reason she felt & I support her 100 percent) and if she didn't want to offer a reason then that is her right also.
I always offer a reason when I pass and I have passed on more than a few occasions but usually it is prior to the client getting to the door. I chalk that up to good screening but then once in awhile one that is less than desirabe may slip through.
I did not intend for my post to appear as though I did not support her. Hope this helps to clear up any misundertanding regsrding my reply.

Recently I read a post written by a disgruntled client that said something to the effect that a provider 'took a pass' on their session while he stood at the front door. I went on to read the responses and not a one of them had anything in defense of the provider.

Instead each and every poster was aghast that any provider should ever do such a thing. I tried to sign in and make these comments.  For some reason I could not gain access to my account until today. Now I can't find the post so I am starting a new thread on the topic.

While I understand the inconvenience this hobbyist suffered. Perhaps on the surface it might have seemed 'unprofessional" as some remarked. On and on went every single person who posted a remark. This provider was well they did ask her name and it was given and the supposition was that no one would want to see such a gal.

I know the gal and she too posted on that thread what really happend. What I want to comment on is, when she saw the young man, her internal senses told her do not do this date. So she didn't do it. She took a pass....

That is what I taught her to do. NEVER never never do anything because you are desperate. Don't do ANYTHING you don't want to do. Don't go with anyone you don't want to go with. etc...

while reading the comments the providers posted I got the impression that none of those making comment would ever take a pass at the last moment regardless of any 'bad feeling' or internal alarm that goes off.

Please tell me girls that this is not true.

Yet not a one posted in defence of all of us.

Have you ever known you shouldn't go to a session and then did it anyway and found out you were right? Did you get busted, rapped, rolled, god knows the things that can happen to us when we don't pay attention to our insticts.

So sometimes we were being paranoid and nothing would have or did happen that was regretful. But sometimes we get hurt.

I am here to say, if you come to my door and you look like your on drugs, to me, and I am all that matters at that moment, I will TAKE A PASS.

Is there anyone who agrees with me?
If you don't please tell me all about it.

I am so sorry that this couldn't have been on the original thread but perhaps it will take a life of its own.

Renee

What if she was a bit uncomfortable, yet decided to go through with the date? What are the chances that he'd have gotten her full 100% effort? Probably not much. Then, she'd have risked a poor review as well and both parties would have "lost".......

I don't want ANY woman who is not 100% comfortable seeing me......

Oh she DEFINITELY did him a BIG favor...

and a favor for many of us others as well!
And so did the OP.

If this is what they call "teaching" or even remotely close to "professional"......they are added to a new list besides the 'personal DNS list'.
I call it the NWIFHISWTLWOEAMCWFOIIDHS.
(No Way In Fucking Hell If She Was The Last Woman On Earth And My Cock Would Fall Off If I Didn't Have Sex...list)


Just sayin'  

This is a discussion board.  The OP made his point in a very articulate, non-flaming manner.  I invited the provider to comment and we had a discussion on the subject.  IMHO, the provider was off base, but at the end of the day, she does have the right to do this and life goes on.  Mistakes were made on both sides.  I am very sensitive to the fact that this is how she earns her living.  This won't be an issue for her unless it becomes a pattern.

After all was said and done, I feel we had a very constructive discussion. I think she (and any lady) is right to turn a hobbyist away if there is a bad vibe.  I have left as well for the same reason, as I am sure many hobbyists have.

You took this personally because you mentored this girl into the hobby.  Your supposition that her side of the story was "what really happened" is biased.  We most often find that reality rests somewhere in the middle.

Kudos to all for the way it was discussed. I think the provider and the hobbyist will be fine and we all learned from it.

Florida board people rock!

I have certainly decided in advance against seeing someone based on 1) how he spoke on the phone (brusque, arrogant, rude 2) what he expressed in an email ("Understand that I expect a full 60 minutes of fucking," "Be prepared to work for your money," and other sentiments that mark him as possibly LE, but certainly crude and demanding 3) and his attitude toward screening (uncooperative, straight-out  lying, false references, etc.

One time I was fooled by a pleasant demeanor and after I was undressed in the individual's upscale hotel, I was treated to a frightening Jekkyl and Hyde encounter that I've never forgotten.

The right to refuse exists on both sides of the door.

I agree with you 100%!!  I have been a hobbiest for a while and know a few providers. One in particular is a friend and she is not that cautious and has regreted not following her instincts. Girls, please be careful out there and listen to your instincts even while you are talking to a client on the phone. If it doesn't feel right, just say no to the client. You can never be too safe!

Last month while touring I was warned of a very popular hobbyist with more than bad hygiene.  I, in the end after contacting 2 other providers decided to see this man.  I should not have, I will not state in what way the hygiene was bad, but put it this way it was nothing a shower would cure.  The problem being once they're at your door, I am a little apprehensive turning them away. For fear of being outed, especially in a  foreign city staying in a hotel.  The man was nice, but this bad experience still lingers with me.

I have walked away from 2 guys while doing an outcall, this was on my own terms.   Yes, in certain circumstances I would walk away.

Thanks every body. I have turned around and gone home several time before I got there, but I try to work with everyone if at all possible. But I have walked out in the middle of a session in the past. I felt bad but it was taking a bad turn. Funny though, he called me endlessly wanting me again but I wouldn't go. I kept explaining to him we weren't having fun. He still wanted more of that though.

I went a house that was so dirty that I had to lay on a clean towel and when done I ran out the door. He said "wait" I said "NO". He too called and called wanting me to come back. He even tried to clean his house for me. But wouldn't do it.

We all have to remember though, most of these guys are great but from time to time you meet up with an ass hole. You could figure it on the phone usually but not always true. We need to place a high value on ourselves and look upon our profession as prized. So take a pass when you need to and be patient if you can.

I think the way it works out with me is that if someone is no good for me it just doesn't work out - that's after me being supersensitive to even an email subject line.

I don't see a lot of clients, and really feel it's just karma that leads us together. I think quite a number of my clients would agree.

Renee is absolutely right, a woman would be out of her mind to see a client she didn't feel good about. Who knows what might happen as a result.

Tamara G x

A few years back I was on my way to SRQ for a 3 hr date with someone I'd seen before.  Someting inside me felt weird, so I called another provider in the area.  I told her what I was doing and where I was going.  She said really?  Because I am scheduled to see the same guy in the middle of your appt with him.  ( I was booked from 2-5 pm, she was booked from 4-6 pm.)  What was he planning to do? Get up and answer the door in the middle of our session?  I think not.  Now, if he pre-arranged a fantasy thing where we both knew she would show up and he do us both, I could've rolled with that. hehe.  So as I was getting off at the exit of the destination,  I turned right around and headed back south.  I was litterally 5 minutes away from sivler bracelets.  I later learned this guy got into trouble and was in fact working with LE.  So Ladies....LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION.  IT KNOWS MORE THAN YOU DO.
Stay Safe,
Hugs
Mena

There is no way to give you 100% of me if I am not feeling confortable, will not be good for both sides.
Out of respect for the other person I am always freshly clean, in a good giving mood, if is my place is an upscale site, clean, with the right ambience and I expect the same.

If the neighbourhood does not feel safe for me, or the place, or the place is not clean, the way the person treats me feel unconfortable, he is drunk, on drugs  or pretend to do some during teh session I will have to walk away and trust my insticts to make sure I am safe.   Most of the time a very good screeneing will do but you never really know.

If you second guess even when you are driving is better to walk away.

Re: Oh she DEFINITELY did him a BIG favor...

OMG!

I have a question for you sir. Are you applying the same mandate upon hobbyist as you do on providers? I noticed that none of the gals you see has come to this post and proclaimed your righteousness in the manner in which you view providers rights.

Are you suggesting that we have no rights?

What you are saying presupposes that you always cancel in a timely manner. It suggests that you never attempt to pay less than agreed upon. It suggests that in every way you are the perfect date. Not to mention with out question and under no circumstances would you 'take a pass'!

Not even if the house was a pig sty: Not if the provider stunk to high heaven. Not if there was a crowd of unsavory men hanging out in the providers yard and sitting on her stoop. Not even if....

OH come on. Did you think the girls here were sold into slavery? Did you think that there is no precautions that a provider should take when things appear or feel dangerous? Where did you get this type of  misogynic information. Most providers are very smart and though I am afraid that self esteem tends to run low. I think it because of the mentality you express here.

Please consider these women as valuable and as ladies (most of us) and as deserving the same rights and considerations as you and the rest of the human race.

So you will definitely disagree and black list me when I tell you and as I encourage providers and hobbyists to 'take a pass' even if in the middle of a session and you see things are not going right (according to you as you are the only person that matters in that moment) Oh yes I have closed a session when I felt that I was being abused and not considered as a human with physical limits.

Not to worry, many a woman hating or at least whore hating hobbyist have said stupid things that are not really true. Things like how bad it would have to be before they would fuck me and even then they would "rather stick their dicks in blenders, have it hit with a mallet and on and on these silly boys go.
                       I am so glad they don't come to see me as I would HAVE to  

                                                       'take a pass'

You're one of those 'gentlemen'  who demand, expect and feel they should never be turned down by a 'who're' because you're 'paying' her????

Baaahahahahaha!

I hope every woman Here reads Your post along with that caveman bronco bill wild west  attitude and tells you to shove it. With your attitude I hope you never get laid again. Just wear your wife beater to the appointment along with the gravy stains on it and see how fast she closes the door in your face and never sees you again - because of it.

Ladies, remaining safe keeps US mongers safe. Don't allow anyone to treat you with disrespect to your own safety.

Posted By: DirtyDaego

and a favor for many of us others as well!
And so did the OP.

If this is what they call "teaching" or even remotely close to "professional"......they are added to a new list besides the 'personal DNS list'.
I call it the NWIFHISWTLWOEAMCWFOIIDHS.
(No Way In Fucking Hell If She Was The Last Woman On Earth And My Cock Would Fall Off If I Didn't Have Sex...list)


Just sayin'