When four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure. Then, Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where. Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floor boards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and liquor. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get a broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel of an escort that Santa called earlier with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'
And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.
On the 12th day of Xmas my ATF gave to me...A twelve minute Bare back blowjob, eleven second rim job, ten minute hand job, nine deep french kisses, eight trips to Dining At The Y, seven minutes of cuddling, six times in the 69 position, Fiiiiiiiive wonderful minutes of sitting on my faaaaaaace, four ben franks, three cum shots, two 36 Double D's & 1 one hour of sweaty hot sex!!!!!!
An important senator arranges to use an escort service and winds up with this beautiful Japanese girl who speaks little English, but hey, he wasn't in the mood for conversation anyway. So they get at it, and she gets into it like no woman he's ever seen! She starts yelling this Japanese word and making faces and he can tell he's driving her crazy! He's never had it so good. So the next morning, he's golfing with the Japanese ambassador, and he makes a birdie. He suddenly remembers the word that the woman yelled at what must have been the moment of climax the night before, and he yells it out. The ambassador looks at him rather oddly, looks at the pin, and says, "no, that was the right hole..."
Unfortunately it looks like your attempt to purchase VIP membership has failed due to your card being declined. Good news is that we have several other payment options that you could try.
VIP MEMBER
, you are now a VIP member!
We thank you for your purchase!
VIP MEMBER
, Thank you for becoming VIP member!
Membership should be activated shortly. You'll receive notification!
