Most of us prefer to get requests for references via email, a nice short note to the provider giving her the heads up regarding your future plans should suffice, but it is always good to read her website or ask her via email how she prefers to handle those requests. Sometimes I even get the name of the tentative provider so I am expecting to hear from the lady at some point.

you have seen her in the last 2-3 months.  Longer than that, she might not remember you.  I have seen numerous posts from providers indicating that unless you have seen her recently, don't ask for a reference.

But, as Paloma said, be sure to ask politely.

Swim

If you contact the lady, remind her who you are, in case she has forgotten.  And ask "Do you mind if I give your name as a reference?"  Most will be honored that you asked.

Sometimes, for people who are on the run and don't always have a firm plan it might be a good idea to ask two ladies that you're friendly to act as an "on call" reference for you. I've had gentleman ask me in the past if they can use me as a reference for any upcoming rendezvous' they set up knowing I'd be able to provide a solid one for them. This way, you're covered on the "ask first" part of things and also covered for "ask later". When choosing your reference ladies choose wisely. You want a lady who's responsive, responsible and respectful of your future date.  

Good luck and have fun!
xo LL

- on a side note, I've been on the awkward receiving side of a reference request without being asked first. It made me incredibly uncomfortable for personal reasons. It's nice that you're thinking as deeply as you are about how you go about asking for them. Thank you on behalf of all of the ladies!

...most providers realize that "you" are not "ours" exclusively and enjoy the company of many ladies. Our safety and security is paramount. Any professional, responsible lady will gladly provide a reference. As mentioned above though, it's always nice to know first that you will be using us as a reference. Just give us a heads up.  

xoxo~
Adrienn

I feel much more comfortable giving a Sailor a reference if he emails me first.  

Just be polite when requesting one from her. I've been asked this many times. I feel honored when I gentleman asks me or even asks me for advice on who to make a date with. Safety is always paramount.

I do agree if it has been a long time. If I have not had a date in a long time, I usually will tell the lady this.

Hope this helps,
Jade

...as others noted.  Whenever a guy lets me know that hes provided my name as a reference, it helps because when she contacts me, Im ready to give her the word right away.  Whether or not I get a heads up though, I always look her up to make sure shes a legit provider before I say anything.  

If I have any doubts, Ill get in touch with him to make sure he put in the request, but then also, Ive had situations where I found several reviews / discussions of a lady being C&D B&S etc, what have you and forwarded the info on to him, which most guys really appreciate.

see the problem here

It is posted on my website so there's no question what I require. As a provider,  I check the lady out first before answering her e-mail. Why ? Because each lady has her way of doing things to stay safe but mostly to see that the lady is legit.

I do ask the gentleman to contact me for permission to use me as a reference and e-mail the ladies info. I've had wives contact me and other providers who were not asked to do so. Less drama for me by being cautious  

Kisses Haley