A friend of mine who now makes documentaries for a living asked me to be his "marquis" in one he filmed just before the election.  First I said yes, then after getting so many "OMG! NO don't do it" answers from people in the Biz, I declined.  It will be called "GFE" and will soon be submitted to HBO, among others.

All of the information is out there in the wild wierd world of the Internet....so easy to find by anyone.

This friend of mine does not have a slant or angle he is trying to force on anyone.  He just wants to tell a story by letting his interviewees (sp?) tell their story.  Isn't it better to get real answers than let other people who don't know just make things up about us?


My questions is, why is it so frowned upon by insiders (both providers and hobbyists)?  

Or have I got it wrong and it is not really frowned upon any longer?

Nikki,

I don't believe I have seen this question asked before and it is a good one.

As a guy, I could not be involved in any way in the filming of a documentary.  I am always amazed when I see guys on the HBO series from "The Bunny Ranch".  

Before I retired, appearing on a show like that would be professional suicide for me and almost all professional guys.

From a lady's perspective, there may come a time when you decide to be invovled with different things in your life like marriage, a different career, or success coming from a hobby like art or music, etc.  

You can take down all your web sites.  Hopefully you have all your pictures on your site(s) protected so no one can copy them.  If the lady is smart in the way she set up her site(s) and posted pictures, literally a year after a lady decided to retire, she should be able to wipe clean all traces to her personally.

A film on the other hand will be with her for the rest of her life because she looses control over where it is seen and who has access to it.

Perhaps that desire to have this part of a lady's life be just that, a part, is the reason so many ladies choose not to be a part of a documentary.

would be LE. The kind of publicity that an HBO show would bring could be considered a slap in the face of LE. They could decide to try to get you. Good luck to you if you decide to do it.

No I did not do it.  The filming is already complete, as far as I know.  At least the girl who took my place....her part was filmed the day before the election.

The advice I got from people in the biz was the polar opposite of my guy friends who I met by way of the biz.  People in the biz told me I would be inviting a whole bunch of unwanted attention, while others thought it would be a great marketing tool.

I think the film maker wanted to get into why girls get into this biz and stay in it.  Not just the ones who are professionals, but girls who do it every now and then on the weekend so they can get their little Coach bag, or whatever.  

My decision was not easy.  Went back and forth on it for a week or so before saying no.  Most of it had to do with my family being told of my chosen profession late last year.  They turned their backs on me during the worst crisis of my life.  Maybe my initial thoughts of why this would be a good thing for me is for theraputic purposes.  Then I realized such a public display is not good for anyone.  The emotional fallout is probably not complete yet and I would end up saying things and agreeing they be a part of the edited version, that I would regret later.  Once it is out there, you can't take it back.

I do beleive the guy who is making this production will produce a very realistic version of the ways things are from a variety of angles.  When it is completed, I will surely let you all know.

exception would be if you wanted to enter the witness protection program and reappear elsewhere with a new identity.

This game of ours is not looked upon favorably by society.  Best to be discreet, and remain under cover.  Even if the person making the documentary is open minded about the hobby, best to remain in the shadows.  Yes, it is open on the net to those who know it's there, but only a small minority view this extensively enough to know the details.  Keep your head down!