I wanted to bring this up, it came to my attention recently while I was out having dinner with a civilian friend of mine. The sex of my friend I will keep anonymous because I really don't think it matters. The outcome was clearly UNACCEPTABLE!!! I spotted him from a distance and really didn't think he would actually walk my way to say hello. But He did. How can people be so ignorant? I continued along my way and totally ignored him. Seriously though, what if the shoe was on the other foot and he was walking around with his wife, wouldn't that be WRONG. There should be a rule book drawn up that every newbie has to read and sign prior to being allowed into this world.
What do you think and what are some other ground rules we need to set?
..I have always told the ladies that work for me , that if I see them in public , I will ignore them , because I do not want them to have to explain to the person that they are with , who I am or how do they know me .
...Now if they come over to me and chat , that's a different story , then I'm very friendly .
..But for me , it must always be their choice .
I've never run into a provider in real life and would be mortified if they came up and engaged me in conversation, forcing me to explain their presence to my civilian companion (especially if it were my wife).
Likewise, I'd never say hi to a lady friend in such circumstances for fear of making her equally uncomfortable.
I don't even think ground rules should apply for this because its common sense.
If you see a provider that you have seen then walk the other way in the opposite direction that they are. Plain & Simple.
'nuff said.
What do you think and what are some other ground rules we need to set?
If you see another hobbyist that you have seen before at a meet & greet or another event then do not engage them or attempt to. Same thing as the provider, walk the opposite direction.
That's just me tho
but it never does. Ever.
Such a shame that it has to be pointed out to people that contact in public is nothing but wrong.
Even if someone is alone...or seems to be...people should keep their distance.
Oh sure...this topic has been brought up before and there's always the inevitable "it doesn't bother me" response. This only reinforces stupid behavior.
The potential for embarrassing someone, causing them to stammer and come up with an explanation to someone else, or possibly even ruining their life....simply isn't worth it just to be "cool" and say hi...or some other such nonsense.
It's a shame that anyone that does that...man or woman....couldn't be drummed out of the business altogether. There really is such a thing as 'too stupid to be allowed to boink'.
Just sayin'
There is always one rotten egg or apple in the bunch. Hopefully this will never happen again. Whether it be at publix, Walmart, the Hard Rock or any other places that we all venture out of our bat caves to.
really ticks me off.
It takes alot and I mean alot to upset me but this infuriates me, as I have had it happen to me.
I have a club that I frequent alot and know alot of people. I was shocked as I was just walking when a guy reached out, grabbed my arm and he said I know you as I visited you. I whispered in his ear to be careful as his friend is watching him and to avoid me.
I was able to figure out who he was and he went on my DNS list. Doing this is NOT being discrete in anyway. It just amazes me as to how guys always want us to be discrete but yet when they see us out in public it is a total rush to them and they have to say hi.
Gents...you never know who we are with just like we don't know who you are with. Please just ignore us. Now if you want to send an email later on, I personally see nothing wrong with that. However, in public geez just leave us alone!!!
in my opinion, if you are out in public and you see someone you have spent time with, if the two of you make eye contact a simple smile or nod is not necessarily out of the question if both parties are alone.
On the other hand, to strike up a conversation with one another is ABSOLUTELY WRONG.
You can be polite and still get the point across.
Sweet Kisses,
Sindie
...the whole gang passed along a signal, a sly finger along the side of their nose.
Back in the 'dark ages' of my youth (a really, really, REALLY, long time ago), in the Boy Scout Honor Society, we had two different secret signs to recognize one and another, one in public, and one in ceremonies.
My college fraternity also had one.
Too bad we don't have one or two for the hobby. Total ignorance if we can't if nothing else, a simple acknowledgement (like a wink) of your presents, and maybe a third for all clear.
This would probably work for the women. Unfortunatly, whenever we guys see a woman, we starting thinking with the smaller head (and it has ONLY one thought).
'rock'
I was leaving a casino after several hours of playing poker and saw a lady I had spent time with the evening prior with another gent. As I passed her, I acknowleded her by a different name (as if she looked like someone else I knew). While she didn't say anything, she later sent me a test saying Did you forget my name?". SO She was okay with it.
Otherwise, just give her a simple smile and don't say anything.
for someone to come along and prove my point PERFECTLY.
Class is saying nothing.
Ass is playing games.
Thus ends our lesson for the day. 
One of the providers I met once comes to my grocery store all the time. We once winked and smiled at each other (came to my checkout line) but that was far enough. I treated her as a customer. Later in times I ignore her like i don't know who she is.
Hey Elle, I'm sorry to hear you had this bad experience. I think it is pretty simple...just go on about your business and walk the other way. We all have our different civie lives to live (hobbyists and providers). You don't know mine and I don't know yours. I would bet it is a small majority of us in this wonderful little P4P life that don't have a lot to lose if we got caught. If you can't respect yourself, at least respect the other person.
Elle, my only problem would be the huge bulge in my pants that I would have not control over if I saw you. I'm not sure how I would explain this to the wife.
Note: Elle is my favorite and she is so unbelievably delicious!
Gomlgo, now that's funny. ROFL! Cute, and thanks for bringing a little light to this depressing topic.
Till the stars align again
Kisses
Not once but twice I have run across a provider in public. Said nothing and walked the other way. Weeks later, them we were alone together as a client in private, I mentioned where and when I saw then in public. Both ladies ask why I did not stop and say hello. One suggested we should have had drinks together. The other a date. OMG - ladies silence is the golden rule.
I can't understand why some folks can't understand the potential problems that come with an accidental meeting outside the boundries of the hobby. Twice I have seen ladies I have been with while out with friends and family...one of those times the provider I saw was my ATF. Believe me when I tell you that my first instinct was to go and talk to her. Fortunately a cooler head prevailed and I was able to quash that instict. I didn't know if the people she was with were family, friends or business aquaintences and the potential for embarrassment was extremely high. I don't know if she saw or recognized me, but in the end I was very happy that no interaction occurred.
Discretion is the very corner stone of this hobby. If you cannot practice discretion you will end up hurting someone else eventually.
Sorry this happened to you...
Back in Puerto Rico it happened to me while I was at lunch with a business colleague! A provider (although things there are a bit different, plus no online ads back in the day) came to say "hi" and even kissed me (in the cheek) while we waited to be seated.
Sure, she was being nice and noticed I felt awkward as she said "good bye, nice seeing you" and walked away - but it was still messy and slightly embarrassing. I would have preferred a smile and wink, in fact I think that would have been very classy.
As a single guy, without a girlfriend, I can see thinking if she wants to say hi, that's fine, if I'm by myself. But six months from now, my situation may be completely different. I truly like the ladies I see, and I hope they feel the same way, but it is a business. And they all have real lives outside the business, and never should the two come together. I'm a friendly guy, and I'd love to say hello, but in this world, the only safe thing to do is stay away. The only way around this I can see is to maybe wait a few minutes and discreetly call and say hi.
If I see one of my clients (which is not often) I wave and walk the other way. I feel like if the shoe was on the other foot and they are out with their family, they do not want me walking up to them to say hi. I think that it is a respect issue. I think that there is a fine line you do not cross and most of us know what that line is and not to cross it. I could be wrong.
http://www.theparadisemensclub.com/kendrapc.html
I've read many a story of guys halfway stalking their fave provider around malls, to her apartment, etc
What do you think and what are some other ground rules we need to set?
Ugh I meant isn't missed among seasoned hobbyists......I dunno what I was doing when I wrote the above lol
What do you think and what are some other ground rules we need to set?
I don't understand that business at all. Hell, all you have to do is call her up, make an appt, and you're in! Literally! DATY and making her come, or doing her doggie, is WAAY more interesting to me than where she buys her shoes. I guess the hobby has just as many weirdos as the rest of the world, maybe more!