A middle-aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked, "Is my time up"
God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, brow lift, lip enhancement, boob job, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was hit and killed by a car. Arriving in front of God, she demanded,
"I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me out of the path of the car?"
God replied, "Girrrlllllll, I didn't even recognize you!!!!
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