Bless Me Father:


"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."
The priest asks, "Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?"

"Yes, Father, it is."
"And who was the woman you were with?"

"Sure and I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now.

Was it Brenda O"Malley?
"I cannot say."

Was it Patricia Kelly?
"I'll never tell."

Was it Liz Shannon?
"I'm sorry, but I'll not name her."

Was it Cathy Morgan?
"My lips are sealed."

Was it Fiona McDonald, Then?
"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Tommy  Shaughnessy, I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must  atone. You cannot attend church for 3 months.. Be off with you  now."

Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and
whispers,

"What'd you get?"
"3 month's vacation and 5 good leads," says Tommy.