A man approached a sexy young gal with ample cleavage in a large supermarket and said "Excuse me, I've lost my wife and even though I've been looking and looking I can't seem to find her. Can you talk to me for a few minutes?" The young gal looked puzzled. "I don't understand? Why talk to me? she asked.
The man replied "Because every time I start talking to a woman with tits like yours, my wife appears out of nowhere!"

I was in a fast food joint and this kid, probably 17, was sweeping up the dining area. A man in his sixties walked right up to this kid and asked him "so, where's my wife?" The poor guy looked so puzzled and shrugged and said I dunno. So then the man reached down and took the broom right out of his hand and said "I see you've got her car, where is she?"