Masturbation is at best a microwave burrito that you get at 7-11, I suppose it can pass for food if you have a vivid enough imagination, but it hardly qualifies as a meal. lol

This is an old quote that I first heard on the British series "Coupling" - one of the funniest shows EVER about dating, sex and life (except for the last season which isn't as good as the rest).  Do yourself a favor - watch the original British version and not the American version.  Anyway, in the series, the lead character Steve says this to his girlfriend's parents in an episode that is full of misunderstandings....