(You've got to hear the dialog with a thick British accent)
Private Smythe reports to the British outpost in the Punjab in the early 20th century.  He reports to the Sergeant Major, clicking to attention.
"Smythe reporting for duty, Sir!"
"Well, Smythe, welcome to the regiment here in the Punjab.  We keep a very busy schedule.  On Monday we drill all day and on Monday night we play cards all night.  You do like to play cards all night, don't you Smythe?"
"Actually, Sir, I'm not much of a gambling man."
"Oh really!  Not a gambling man!  Well, let's see.  On Tuesday we drill all day and Tuesday night we drink all night.  You do like to drink all night, don't you Smythe?"
"Actually, Sir, I'm a tee totaler."
"Oh, really!  A tee totaler is it?  Well, let's see.  On Wednesday we drill all day and on Wednesday night we wench all night.  Wink, wink, nudge, nudge and all that.  You do like to wench all night, don't you Smythe?"
"Actually, Sir, I'm not much for wenching at all."
"Oh, really!  Not much for wenching?  I say, Smythe, you're not homosexual, are you?"
"Oh no, Sir!"
"Well then, you won't like Thursday night either."