Advise for the day: If you have a lot of tension & get a headache, follow the instructions on the aspirin bottle, "Take two & keep away from Children."---Author Unknown

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball & savng an infant's life, she will choose saving the infant without even considering if there are runners on base."---Dave Barry

"Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many.  Manogamy is the same."---Oscar Wilde

"Suppose you were an idiot....And suppose you were a member of Congress....But I repeat myself."---Mark Twain

"Ah yes, divorce.....from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."---Robin Williams

"Women complain about prementrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time I can be myself."---Roseanne

"You can say any foolish thing to a dog, & the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, your'e right!  I never would've thought of that."---Dave Barry

"Do you know why they call it 'PMS?'  Because "Mad Cow Disease' was already taken."---Author Unknow..& now presumed deceased