You may have seen on the news recently that there was a judge who was caught using a penis pump in his courtroom. I recognized him right away as my proctologist from my annual cancer check-up and wondered when he had become a Judge.

So, I called the detective on the case to inquire about the situation to see just was up, besides this clown's pecker.  After advising the detective of my concerns, he asked me to describe my last visit to his office.

"Well, let's see.  I had to drink a quart of that milk of magnesia crap that tastes like chaulk the night before...  When I arrived in his office, he asked me to disrobe and put on an apron type thing with sleeves that was fully open in the back...  He lubricated my rectum and warned me that this may hurt a bit...  Then he put his left hand on my left shoulder and inserted this thing in my ass...  Then he put his right hand on my right shoulder..."  And the detective interupted,"Hold it right there for a second, you're going too fast..."  As I recalled the thoughts of how fast this guy was pumping my procto and I suddenly realized this son-of-a-bitch had both his hands on my shoulders while...  "Oh!  My God!!"  The detective replied, "Well, judges are lawyers too, you know!"