Last night, my wife and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

She got up, unplugged the Computer, and threw out my wine.

She's such a bitch.....


A wife accompanied her husband to the doctor's
office. After his checkup, the doctor called the
wife into his office alone.

He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very
severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will
surely die: Each morning, fix him a healthy
breakfast. Be pleasant, and make sure he is in a
good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal.
For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for
him. Don't burden him with chores, as he probably had a hard day. Don't discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. And, most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week and satisfy his every whim. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."

On the way home, the husband asked his wife."What did the doctor say?"

"You're going to die," she replied.