Feel free to add your own inventions.

"I asked her what she thought of my oral favors. She said she hadn't been eaten like that in years. I said really, that good? She said no, that bad."

She put a paper bag over my head.

...I asked her if she wanted to go again. She said I didn't want to go the first time.

After a few minutes, I asked her if she brought protection. She said of course and started wrapping me in duct tape.

After another great session I told her she was my ATF. She said you're my DFC. I said what's that? She said Desperate for Cash.

She said okay. I'll close the door and give you some privacy.

I asked her if I might make a trip to Greece. She said sure, how soon can you leave?

I asked her if I could cum in her mouth. She said sure if I can spit in your eyes.

I got soo excited! I asked her if I could SPANK HER!
She replied:   "Sure, but then I SLAP YOU!"

I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.

A hooker once told me she had a headache.  

...She bent over!

I said I'm feeling a little kinky, would she want to put a blindfold on me? She said would a mask be OK?

i saw Rodney several times before he passed. Both your bits coulda been in his act...Thanks.

I asked her if she'd consider rimming me. She said I might as well, how much worse could it be than kissing your mouth?

I asked her if I could stick a finger in her ass. She said that might be too big, let's start with your cock.

I was getting ready to leave and asked her what she thought of our session. She said you are incredibly sweet - I wonder if I could ask you a small favor? I said of course, what is it? She said could you please see someone else next time?

I asked her if she would like me to take a shower before we got started. She said yes please - and let me know when you are done so I can delouse you.

I arrived at her incall and asked where to put the envelope. She said you can keep it... Your wife contacted me and when she found out I am a call girl who would be servicing you she insisted on paying for the session herself.

I knocked on the door and she opened it slowly. When she stepped out from behind the door I gave her a quick peck and asked her how much I owed her. She said she was running a special today. I said great, what's the special? She said I'll give you $150 if you leave right now.

I said what are you waiting for, go ahead and start blowing me. She said I am still looking for it.

She said she told one of her friends about me and she was really eager to see me. I said I guess you told her what a great lover I am. She said no, I told her I was pretty sure you could cure her insomnia.

I knocked on the door and was a little surprised by what l saw. She said what's wrong? I said you look a little older than your photos. She said you look a little older than my grandpa's photos.

As soon as I was in the door she got a strange look on her face and said "is your face hurting you?" I said "no, why?" She said "Because it's killing me!"

Good one!

I asked her how she enjoyed the session. She said easy, I just pretended you were my previous client.

She asked me how I found out about her. I said my friend told me you smell like a gardenia and fuck like a tiger. She said what a coincidence, you smell like a tiger and fuck like a gardenia.

I called her up and asked how much she charges. She said you fuck either my pussy or my ass for $50 or both for $75. I said that sounds like a bargain, I will be right over. Turns out she runs a petting zoo.

I asked my ATF if she had a girlfriend she could bring along for doubles. She said that might be kind of tough. I said why is that? She said most of my girlfriends aren't half as desperate as I am.

I said I am in the mood for some kink, how would you like to tie me up and flog me? She said sure, I can do that. I said great, pretend you hate me and really let me have it. She said who's pretending?

I entered her K9 and pounded away with everything I had. After a few minutes I asked how she was doing. She said fine, but you don't need to be so gentle.

She said let's get started, how many times do you usually cum in a session? 3? 2? 1? I said you are getting warm.

I told her I was in the mood to play the field a bit and asked if she would be willing to refer me to any of her friends. She said no, but I have a couple of enemies that I would love for you to see.

I asked her if she offers Greek. She said yes, but I charge based on size. I said how much for my size? She said you'd be eligible for a $50 rebate.  

I told her I was thinking about bringing my wife to a session. She said that would be fine, I'm happy to see couples. I said are you really bi? She said, no, since I met you I have to fake it with men.

She texted me her room number and I went up and knocked on the door. Instead of opening the door she said that she looked through the peephole and would have to cancel, something came up. I said what do you mean, what came up? She said my breakfast.

I asked her if it was hard having sex with so many clients. She said no, a lot of the time I think about something else. I said what do you think about when you are with me? She said I think about being in a hot shower scrubbing off the stench.

She said I suddenly don't feel so hot, my stomach is really queezy. I said I am sorry to hear that, is there anything I can do to help you feel better? She said yes, you can leave.

She said I want you to fuck me like you are going to cum for the last time in your life. I said too late, that happened five years ago.

She was a real beauty but spoke with a slight lisp. She said do you want to fuck my puthy, my ath, or my mouth? I said either your pussy or ass would be fine, but I am probably too big to fuck a mouse.

She pulled me over in front of a new mirror she had installed in her bedroom. I said fantastic, are you going to let me watch you give me a blow job in the mirror? She said no, I'm going to let you watch yourself jerk off while I read the Sunday paper.

She opened the door, I laid down the donation, and as I gave her the once over she slapped my face. I said why'd you do that? She said I didn't like the look on your face. I said what look? She said you looked like you where thinking about fucking me.

She rolled on the condom, I slid in for a moment, then withdrew and hopped out of bed. She said where are you going? I said to get the donation - you told me to be sure to place the envelope down as soon as I enter.