A man comes home from work and finds his young son sitting on the steps crying.  "What's the matter, son?" says the man.

"I came home today and my pet hamster was lying on the floor on his back and his legs were sticking up in the air and he wasn't moving and I think he's dead."

"Son" says the man.  "Your hamster is up in heaven with Jesus and he's really happy now.  He doesn't have to worry about anything anymore.  When we die we'll all go to heaven with Jesus and be happy."

The little boy thinks about it and stops crying.

A few days later the man comes home and his young son is sitting on the steps crying, again.

"What's the matter, son?"

"Mom almost died today!"

"OH MY GOD, what happened?"

"Well, I came home from school and she was lying on the floor with her legs up in the air and she was screaming "JESUS, I'm comming!"  You know, if the mailman hadn't been there to hold her down I think she would've gone."