> How Fights Start
>
> My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping
> channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'
>
> I said, 'Dust.'
>
> And then the fight started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A
> Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and
> said, "Do you want to have sex?"
>
> "No," she answered.
>
> I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
>
> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying,
> "Yes."
>
> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a
> friend."
>
> And then the fight started....
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my
> lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the
> boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a
> torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I
> pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and
> discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
>
> I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped
> back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with
> a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather
> out there is terrible."
>
> My loving wife of 5 years replied, "Can you believe my
> stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
>
> And that's how the fight
> started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
> My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
> anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes
> from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
>
> I bought her a bathroom scale.
>
> And then the fight started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to
> apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter
> asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I
> looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at
> home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would
> have to go home and come back later.
>
> The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened
> my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That
> silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and
> she processed my Social Security application.
>
> When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my
> experience at the Social Security office..
>
> She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You
> might have gotten disability, too.'
>
> And then the fight started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> My wife and I were sitting at a table at my school reunion,
> and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as
> she sat alone at a nearby table.
>
> My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
>
> 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend.
> I understand she took to drinking right after we split up
> those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober
> since.'
>
> 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a
> person could go on celebrating that long?'
>
> And then the fight started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason
> took my order first. "I'll have the steak, medium
> rare, please."
>
> He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad
> cow?""
>
> "Nah, she can order for herself."
>
> And then the fight started...
>
>
> ******************************************
>
>
>
> A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
> She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband,
> "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really
> need you to pay me a compliment.'
>
> The husband replied, 'Your eyesight's damn near
> perfect.'
>
> And then the fight started....




Lustfully yours,
Tori Blake