A long married couple were getting bored of each other. The wife in frustration decided to get a pet for her husband to get him off her back. At the petstore, the clerk said, "I have just the thing...I have some very special frogs".  "Frogs???" she replied, "What's so special about frogs?.  The clerk smiles and says, "This one will suck dick".  She says excitedly, "I'll take it!".  Later that night, she wakens from a sleep to a terrible noise.  Runs downstairs to find her husband and the frog clanging around pots and pans in the kitchen.  She says, "What the hell are you doing?".  The man replies, "Look, as soon as I teach this frog to cook, You're OUTTA HERE!".