A man who just broke free from prison breaks into a couple's house and ties them up in their bedroom. The husband sees him kiss his wife on the cheek and then walk into the bathroom.
The husband says "Listen hon, this guy has probably not been with a woman in a while and is horny so he kissed you. If he wants to fuck you just go with it and save both our lives."
His wife responds "Listen sweetie, he wasn't kissing me, he was whispering in my ear that he's gay and thinks you're cute and wants some vaseline. I told him there's some in the bathroom. Just go with it and save both our lives!"
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