Only a West Virginian could think of this ..  from the county where drunk
driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked  outside a bar in Ripley, West
Virginia~~ After last call the officer noticed a  man leaving the bar who
was obviously so intoxicated that he could barely walk.  The man stumbled
around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer  quietly
observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five
different vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He
sat  there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and
drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the  wipers on and off (it was a fine,

dry summer night) -- flicked the blinkers on,  then off a couple of times,
honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He  moved the vehicle
forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained  still for a few
more minutes as some more of the other patron vehicles left.

At last, the parking lot empty, he pulled  out of the parking lot and
started to drive slowly down the road. The police  officer, having patiently

waited all this time, now started up the patrol car,  put on the flashing
lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a  Breathalyzer
test. To his amazement the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence of  the man
having consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll
have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This Breathalyzer
equipment must be
broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud  Hillbilly. "Tonight I'm the designated
decoy.