Q. What is the difference between a Drug Dealer and a Hooker?

A. A Hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
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Q. What's a mixed feeling?

A. When you see your Mother-In-Law backing off a cliff in your new car. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q What's the height of conceit?

A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q. What's the definition of "Macho?"

A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.
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Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?

A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
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Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?

A. They spray paint an "X" on the back of the sheep that kick!
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Q. Why is divorce so expensive?

A. Because it's worth it!
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Q. What is a Yankee?

A. The same as a quickie, but a Guy can do it alone.
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Q. What do Tupperware and a Walrus have in common?

A. They both like a tight seal.
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Q. What do a Christmas tree and a Priest have in common?

A. Their balls are just for decoration.
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Q. What is the difference between "ooooooh" and "aaaaaaah?"

A. About three inches.
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Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?

A. The grip.
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Q. How do you find a Blind Man in a nudist colony?

A. It's not hard.
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Q: What's the difference between a Girlfriend and a Wife?

A: 45 pounds.
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Q: What's the difference between a Boyfriend and a Husband?

A: 45 minutes.
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Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?

A: Breasts don't have eyes..
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Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?

A: Six inches is medium, nine inches is rare.
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Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A . They don't have balls to scratch!
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You can always unscrew a light bulb

many thanks to Steve Martin in My Blue Haven.....saw it last week...what memories..lol

Those are funny I really like those havent seen any of those befor