A married couple were having a major argument in their penthouse hotel room. Finally the husband called down to the front desk and said “My wife and I are having a fight and now she’s threatening to jump out the window. Please send someone up here fast.”  
The front desk manager said “I’m sorry sir but that’s a personal issue. You’ll have to solve it yourselves.”
“Personal issue?” exclaimed the man. “This is a MAINTENANCE issue. The window is stuck closed.”