This actually occurred several months ago but I remembered it this morning, started laughing again and thought I would share it with you.

I was having a massage and I anted up for “the works”. My masseuse had already finished my back and I flipped over. I was observing her lovely natural breasts though they were just out of reach and beginning to get excited when …

I heard my masseuse give a slight wretch. Then a little bit louder wretch. Then she rushed out and I heard the sound of her throwing up in the next room.

I knew it wasn’t because of my “manhood” because he is quite small, well groomed and I painted a happy face on him (LOL - just trying to stave off potential verbal abuse). But it was so bizarre to be just sitting there in my "all naturals" and trying to decide what to do next.

Anyway, my masseuse soon came back to tell me she had to go before she got sicker. Apparently, she had taken medicine on an empty stomach.

Needless to say the session did not conclude with the anticipated "happy ending".

Got a story to share?

My worst experience with a hooker happened many, many, many years ago in Dallas. I picked up a lady-of-the-evening on Harry Hines and I followed her in her car to a very dark parking lot. We both got into her back seat and I took down my pants. I pulled my manhood through the flap of my underwear and off we went.

As I said it was quiet dark and the car had a odd odor but I let my little brain outweigh my sense of smell or the warnings from the big brain because I was horny as hell.

Anyway, when I got back home and went to the bathroom ... OMG, I had blood all over my briefs. The hooker (bitch) did me while she was having her monthly event.

I had to sneak the briefs out of the house and trash them because there was no way I could explain those to my wife short of committing suicide by chopping off my member.

Not a great moment!

-- Modified on 2/15/2007 4:13:36 PM