This board seeming to need another kick in the pants to get it out of the doldrums (different this time - bad news not bickering - but still pretty grim). So let me see how painting a target on my ass plays out.
Reviews. Might as well go for the big one now, and get my ass fried.
I think the general view, the safe view that will not get your ass fried, is that "reviews are for your fellow hobbyists." And the most important thing about a review is that it is truthful.
There is some truth to this one, but reviews are not only for your fellow hobbyists, nor are they even primarily for your fellow hobbyists. The reviews most affect the reviewer and the provider, followed by TER, and then other hobbyists. And since a review is mostly about your subjective impressions of a private, fictional encounter, saying that it has to be truthful is close to meaningless. But people keep saying that - "Just tell the truth."
I imagine people will infer all sorts of things from that statement, and not without reason. When I write a review I consider the impact on me, the provider, TER (since if I do not, they will not approve my review, plus they are more or less paying me for my review) and my fellow hobbyists. In that order? Maybe, but mostly all mixed up together.
The defenders of "The review is for your fellow hobbyists, so be truthful" are quite aggressive. When someone dares to disagree they get slammed. The result is that discussions on reviews are short, and disconnected from how many review. The discussion focuses on an unattainable, unrealistic ideal based on the assumption that we are each some sort of objective camera recording the pure truth and need only play it back, while most reviewers are a jumble of physical and emotional reactions, partially remembered impressions, and may be going through a much more practical, and probably self-serving, calculation as they craft the review. They lack nuance.
My request to reviewers is different and a lot more practical:
1. If it is a rip off, please tell us, in detail. This is the most important thing.
2. Be consistent. Also be aware of your mood and try to make the review more about the looks and performance than your reaction, though we want to know about both.
3. Do not be vindictive. Slamming someone because you asked for something and did not get it, is not at all helpful to you or me unless you tell us. It also is not consistent (i.e. do not give her a 9 for looks if she will do BBBJ, or a 6 if she won't - she looks the same either way). Feel free to say "I was in the mood for a BBBJ and when she refused, well, things went downhill from there." That is useful. Hiding that truth and punishing her for it in the review makes your review misleading.
4. Give us as much detail about the experience and your reaction as you can.
5. Do not base your scores on her other reviews, base them on your other reviews. See number 2.
6. Do not use the same old cliched BS. Does she really look like a fashion model? Tell us which one she reminds you of. Did she really smell and taste, sweet and clean? Freshly washed or like a particular flavor, say from a hygiene product? Some people prefer orange flavored while others just want fresh. Sort of a joke, but not so much. Give us the details, not the meaningless cliche - oops, I seem to be repeating myself.
There also is this golden rule aspect to reviewing, both regarding the provider as well as my fellow hobbyists. Will I torch myself to provide a little more info to my fellow hobbyists? No, and I do not expect others to do so either. Will I violate what I consider to be a confidence from a provider to give some valuable insight? No, because I expect reciprocal confidentiality from that same provider. When it is all said and done, I would hope my reviews, at worst, seem like constructive criticism, and not character assassination, except for rip offs, of course. The ideal would be to never say anything negative in a review that I have not already said to the provider, but since the negative reviews tend to reflect uncomfortable meetings, it has proven hard to put that into practice.
So, no, reviews are not only for my fellow hobbyists. And, no, it is not all about being truthful, whatever that means. It is about not intentionally lying, of course, but truthful is not doable, IMO, since a review is an opinion in a lot of ways, which is not true or false, by definition. Where we go from there, well that is a little complicated and I do not pretend to have all the answers. But let's not oversimplify, and flame people, providers and hobbyists, who want to share their opinions, reactions, experiences. After all, the more information we have on a reviewer, the more we know how to use his reviews.
Share what you can, and let the conversation flow. Encourage discussion, and openness, do not attack it and cut it off.
zig
As you discuss in your OP the reviews can and do serve a variety of purposes. But my feeling is that the number one reason they should exist is for the "hobbyist" and his use in determining whether or not to see a gal based on prior reviewers experiences. This is one "camp", but after having been involved with TER for nearly two years that simple explanation is clearly NOT so simple!
You have another "camp" that believes that kissing up for a provider using inflated and often exagerated reviews is the way to go. I have seen a number of ladies here (some I reviewed...others I decided to not review for a variety of personal reasons) that based on other reviewers left me wondering what these fellas were experiencing. There are all types of discussions here that touch on various reasons why these types of reviews exist, yet they are clearly for the "benefit of the providers".
Then there is the "camp" that wants to ask permission to review. I have NEVER asked nor will I ask any gal "permission" to file a review. But based on prior discussions here there are many that feel that this is a "good practice". I don't really care all that much one way or another other than to suggest that if some John saw a gal that I reviewed...and he saw her in part because he had the luxury of MY review, why not give back to the community. Things DO change with providers over time. There are many, many gals that haven't updated their sites in years, along with pics that are clearly (after you meet her of course) well out of date. I could equate this to any business that is looking for feedback (and granted some gals DON'T want the feedback) to improve their business. And the only way to do so is to continuously get feedback on the services provided. But to ask for permission...well that is NOT something I have any interest in. And of course there are those ladies that will throw up the "we need our privacy due to whatever". Well gals, you might be in the wrong business for that, at least IMHO!
And lastly you have the "I won't review anybody camp". And to those fellas all I can say is thanks for the intel. And these guys have their reasons, but it smacks of the same nonsense that the gals throw up out there. The word that comes to mind here is "lazy". These are the same guys who will post on the board ISO without reviews looking for help. And there are a bunch of others out there that simply lurking with no intent of reviewing...ever!
But with all of the pitfalls that this review system has, it is still the best out there for giving the hobbyist the best opportunity to find his "dream" date. And it gives the gals a platform using a myriad of avenues to promote and market themselves. And for many guys that see more than three or four gals, spend some time and effort on here doing some research, these guys learn rather quickly how to READ a review, understand that certain reviewers simply review to curry favor (or OTC crap), while others feel they can attempt to DESTROY a gals business by writing vindictive and false reviews.
It really didn't take me all that long to understand TERese and it's complexities. And each of us is here searching for that elusive "jackpot". But each of us has a different definition of what we seek and how we go about seeking this.
the Gospels of the Bible. The same people will not review the same provider all the time, so the only thing you can hope as far as consistency is if you look at that hobbyist's reviews as an aggregate and see if they write their reviews consistently. We all have different life experiences and different filters so expression of an event could vary. Now, for example, I may not have the same tastes as ChiTownPimp(though I actually do) but I know his reviews to not only are consistent relative to his psyche, but they are consistent relative to the rules of the road of this board. Frankly I have a problem of giving a provider a 10 that does not perform all sexual acts, but I do understand the subjectivity point. So Even though the Apostles wrote of the same events, each Gospel is clearly different and to get the experience, you really need to read them all. I feel the same with reviews. I read several to get an idea of the experience.