I wrote this to a well meaning "hobbyist" who chose to see what I do, sensual massage, as an avenue to other activities, whether than standing on its own for what it is:  sensual massage:



...And regarding seeing me one more time to see if I offer "French"...  If that means oral sex, no, I don't.  The problem that I have with this arrangement of providers fluidly bleeding in and out of everyone else's categories is that no one ever seems to have a clear idea of what is what.  You go to see an escort when you want to have a hot SEXUAL experience, and you come to see me when you want a great therapeutic massage + a SENSUAL experience.  

I wish I could get everybody to agree:  
(1) Therapeutic CMTs don't do anything sexy at all,
(2) Sexy MTs work with their hands, and
(3) Escorts offer full service but not (or possibly including) massage (but they are typically not professionally trained to do so, so "rubdown" more accurately applies).  

The way I would love for people to look at me is 80% massage plus...  Instead of 80% plus and then throw a little half-assed rubdown in for good measure.  You have to draw the line somewhere, and if I wanted to start offering "French", I might as well start offering everything else and charging accordingly.  Plus I'm planning on going back to having a therapeutic-only practice at some point, so if I moved even further into sensual massage and away from what regular CMTs think is "legitimate", I would be moving further away from my goals, my professional peers, and my definition of self.  I don't do anything halfway.   I don't plan to move in reverse as far as my psychological health (i.e., allowing my boundaries or comfort level to be eroded in order to make a buck or be more "popular").  It's not that I would mind sleeping with YOU for physical reasons or otherwise, as you're legitimately attractive, but the fact that if YOU are not my man who is coming home every night to be with me and watch the news and cuddle on the couch and eat cold pizza and meet my family and take my car to the shop for me and all the other things that boyfriends and husbands do, I will not have sex with you, adult business or not.

I want it ALL:  a boyfriend (possibly husband) and clients that will let me express and enjoy my sensuality within limits that are set for sane physical (i.e., avoidance of STDs, including herpes and other maladies that can be spread WITH condom use, including orally), social, and psychological reasons.  I openly tell people at parties who ask, "What do you do?" that I'm a sensual massage therapist, and it is something that I personally can feel good about and brag about.  If I were offering "extras" that I wasn't comfortable with, I would then be forced to start lying about what I do or don't do with my clients, and even though that might seem to be a small point for most, to me hiding myself has gotten old, and I will both celebrate and take pride in what I do and who I am.

If I were going to be an escort, we would be swinging from the rafters.  It's not about being rigid or "business like" (although it's amazing how that can have a negative connotation, considering the only way I meet a person who then sees my demeanor that way is THROUGH an advertisement for business), but about being professional, consistent (you really wouldn't want an inconsistent CMT, it doesn't work as a more easygoing "what happens happens" attitude does with providers of other services--don't you want to KNOW you're going to get a thorough massage or just hope for it when you're sore from the gym), and knowing what I am comfortable and not comfortable with.  And I am frustrated that clients, in large part because of these boards, see a provider as worthwhile primarily if she offers "this" or "that".  If some new girl came to town and had an entirely new body cavity for everybody to stick things into, the rest of us would be expected to have surgery to create something similar, or we wouldn't be as "great".  "GFE" would be yesterday's news as far as the "ultimate" experience was, and there would be some new acronym (ABC, for additional body cavity?) that would apply only to those providers who merited above an 8, and everybody else would be has-beens.  

I get along with my first-timers better than the "hobbyists" because they are able to experience the extreme focus that makes every nerve ending, every hair on their bodies, hypersensitive, and they are totally subtly aware of what is going on.  It is not about taking advantage of anyone because they are a novice, but rather being the best mutual fit for both of us.  I notice with these reviews that the dissatisfactions and criticisms get greater with the greater number of providers that one sees, almost as if we were BBQ restaurants or headache tablets and therefore laterally comparable.  

Now I KNOW it's the adult biz and I'm supposed to be hot, but here's the deal:  I'm a PERSON, not a blow-up doll, and I offer something that FEELS great, not a stage revue, as my ad emphasizes my WORK, not my availability for prodding in a variety of orifices.  And while I do look pretty damn good, I am natural and human and not trying to be the hottest or youngest thing on the block, because it's not possible (Heidi Fleiss says it in her book--there is always someone hotter and younger than you, but fortunately, I don't care, I just love being me--I'm not conceited, just genuinely accepting and appreciative of my looks and self) and not necessary to give a great sensual massage.  

You can only really enjoy what I do when you can lie back and say "ahhhh".  When we have an hour (or however long) to spend together and you spend a great deal of it thinking, "I wish she would do this TOO or INSTEAD" or otherwise not enjoying the moment, you are not able to fully enjoy what IS happening, you are just consumed with thinking about what is NOT happening.

I know it's a crazy concept on Eros:  offer massage, provide massage...

What I provide is quality and simplicity, not games, and because of my training I would be selling myself short to throw in a bunch of other things that will make me feel worse about myself at the end of the day.  I do not want to perceive myself as a full-on escort.  What I am comfortable with is touching, and fortunately for my clients who enjoy it, that has widespread sensual applications.

One gentleman said my rates were high for this "kind of" service, but the funny thing is, there is no "kind of" to compare me to.  You can get a great deep massage or a sexy romp, but you can't get something that's really an effective combination done with professional pride from nearly anybody else (maybe in California, where massage in all its forms is far more common, but I've looked at ALL the reviews and ads in Chicago--there is NO one else).  The girls who play around with the skin on your back and then giggle and suck you off aren't doing what I do, so I have no problem with my clients seeing them when that's what they need and then seeing me when they need a real massage.  I'm not a jealous girl.

This is just my personal philosophy.  It's so beautifully simple and can really be summed up in just a few words (though ironically it takes many more to clarify what has become confused by so many others):  I offer therapeutic and sensual massage.  That means I work with my HANDS, not my tonsils or my vagina.  

KISS (Keep It Simple...  you know the rest)

-- Modified on 12/4/2004 9:55:30 AM

-- Modified on 12/4/2004 9:57:52 AM

I'm a newbie on the board.  Liked your post.  What is your link?

Save us all the pretentions.  You remind me of Hugh Hefner and his silly 'Playboy Philisophy'.  He could and did drone on for pages about various hairsplitting fatious theories.  What they all boiled down to was that he liked getting off with lots of young pretty girls and didn't want to marry any of them.

You want to pretend you are a professional with pretentious and important limits.  Wrong, you are a rubber who tugs.

Spare us all the pontificating and self justification.  The girls who actually want to do a great job spend a far less amount of time yapping about what THEY want and think about what the client wants.

That is why they can charge more and have more business.

Actually, I'm not "pontificating" at all, merely frustrated at having my limits constantly pushed and tested, when all I want to do is what I do and do it well.

Full service providers can and do charge more for the same reasons that TER will give a provider an "8", "9", or "10" in a review--because she will offer up more sexual services than someone else (i.e., no condom, swallow, anal, etc).

As far as being a "rubber who tugs":  Again, I've never felt pretentious about the adult business, in fact I love sensuality, to the degree that I'm comfortable expressing it.  If what my "client wants" is to do something that I'm not consensually going to agree to, that's just too bad, so I merely want my clients to know what is and what isn't going to happen up front, not lead them down a merry path making them think something "might" happen just to get them in and out the door.  I've told clients clearly over the phone before going on outcalls, "I WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH YOU", just like that, only to have them try to push me down forcibly later on, then tell me after I squirmed free, "I just thought you were trying to be discreet"!  Clients will read into something like "no full service" until the cows come home, it seems, regardless of how emphatic you make it.  I want clients to come see me who don't have the mindset that keeps recurring in reviews, "She knew I wasn't interested in the therapudic (sic) part..."  I'm a "rubber" who spent thousands of dollars to go to school for a full year and then be on the job for several more, and while that may not be the number of years in an institution to pursue a master's in finance, it is still a lot more effort than a "rubber who tugs" has made.

The problem, I think, is the target audience, nothing more.  I stayed off of Eros for a few years, even though people kept recommending it to me.  In that time I had regular clients who would come back once a month or more for years, and I was seeing a few people each day, with NO reviews.  I was under the radar with LE and never had to experience any fallout from people expecting more than massage.  I think when clients become "hobbyists" they adopt a different mindset that is more dismissive and attention-challenged.  I've never wanted to marry a client, and the fact that a client likes young pretty girls is perfectly understandable.  My position in the business is not to be an escort but a massage therapist who offers a little extra "kick", and there are people who frequent therapeutic only therapists as well as women who provide a little "more" regularly, because massage is something you do more regularly than frequenting escorts, and for entirely different reasons and benefits.  It's apples and oranges, and I won't disagree with you about men liking young girls or variety, of course they do.  It doesn't offend me or make me feel in any way lessened or inferior--I'M NOT TRYING TO COMPETE for escort business, it's the clients who confuse what I do and what they expect, not the other way around.

And, considering I have only posted my own concerns and frustrations and not attacked you or anyone else personally, why have you chosen to do so to me?  If you personalized my comments, you must be feeling defensive for a reason, but I didn't insult or attack you.  It's always the same in a forum like this:  when you try to express any prevailing DIFFERING opinion or perspective than the norm, you always get attacked.  Thanks for being so consistent, but then I expected it, especially here.  This is, after all, the venue that gives men who are expected to be respectful on the street the anonymous opportunity to become their guttural secret alter ego.

-- Modified on 12/5/2004 2:05:41 AM

And regarding the "playboy philosophy" and fatuous theories:  I am the first no-nonsense plain-talkin southern gal to cut through the BS and just call something for what it is.  That's why it's so disappointing that a great percentage of clients don't have the ability to see the difference between:

1)  A certified and licensed massage therapist who has put in her time and money to train and can therefore provide, to the clients who want it and "get" the difference, a skilled therapeutic massage WITH the sensual bit (for the clients who have different priorities and just want to bang a hot new chick every week, godspeed, THAT'S THE POINT).  If, like so many posters who have been to see FBSM therapists who focus a great deal on the therapeutic part, aren't interested in that part, WHY GO?

2)  A woman who is simply not comfortable with full service but has no training in massage and just wants to charge a little less to dance around, tickle your back, and then either "tug" you or suck you off -- this is gleaned from the REVIEWS, btw, not my own assumptions.  I was hard pressed to find ANY review that said that the massage, both therapeutic and sensual, was a complete one hour experience.  it was ALWAYS like a brief prelude to everything else, a rubdown before getting "on with business", business of course being at the least oral (it doesn't even fit, like those pictures on Sesame Street where one shape is different from everything else...  really, when did this start?  i've been in the FBSM massage business for 8 YEARS, surely longer than probably anyone working in Chicago right now, and when I started, SM was, similarly to therapeutic, a MANUAL experience that involved some form of massage from beginning to end, for the amount of time that you had paid for.

Once again, am I disappointed that clients who prioritize full service and endless variety and youth want to call someone else?  NO!!!  My point is, I WISH THEY WOULD, rather than come to me and ask me to do all the things I'm not in business to do, or hold me up to templates of expectation that don't even match what I'm about.  I score high in some categories that the young hot FS girls in question can't even hold a candle to, and then they excel far beyond me in other categories that I won't even try to excel in, because I'm NOT INTERESTED in competing with them with the same type of presentation or for the same results.  You sell different things with different tactics.  If you offer different things, everybody can find what they like, and not everybody will like the same thing.  Apples...  Oranges...  One is crunchy, one is soft and pulpy...  They are different...  Anything getting through, or is it as I'm starting to understand, different from other cities, that Chicago is a town where no one appreciates a genuine CMT with credentials who also provides sensual massage (and that means an appreciation for and accentuation on the "therapudic" portion of the massage, with a desire to have the sensual thing thrown in as an extra, not the main event)?  Your lack of vision serves to confirm that for me, which is precisely what I was suspecting and trying to confirm.  Thank you for saving me a lot of trouble, I think I see better options on the horizon.

-- Modified on 12/5/2004 12:58:46 AM

-- Modified on 12/5/2004 12:34:57 AM

I provide only FBSM, but only because FS would mess with my head. FBSM helps me keep boundaries and avoid getting attached to some of my fave guests. If I provided FS, I would have crushes on a million guys.

That said, I don't think it's cool to imply that you are ANY better than ANY girl..WHether she provides FS or massage, or is a CMT. Technically, it is worse in the eyes of your professional peers to be a CMT who dabbles in the sensual, than to be a prostitute who "doesn't know any better. " The therapeutic massage community sees you as a Benedict Arnold who makes it more likely to cause clinical massage therapists to be harrassed, and as someone who causes their profession to be joked about constantly.

It seems more honest to just say you're either an escort or a bodyrub artist. Maybe lose the massage term all together out of respect for the professionals who invest their time and money only to be harassed by every man who comes thru their office door. I mean, really, the difference between escort and "masseuse" is minor. You are pulling $$ from the same pool as everyone else. Don't take yourself so seriously.

You are NOT the only girl who offers true therapeutic massage knowledge combined with sensual know how. I know several, all of whom are talented, intelligent, beautiful, and sweet.

Again, I have no problem with the sex industry, obviously. I just have a problem with judging people/ self-superiority.

If you're really concerned with being a healing therapeutic influence, consider that humility comes with the territory.

aye god, i'm not saying i'm superior, i'm saying i offer this, somebody FS offers that, and i just want that to be clear so i'm not fighting off advances CONSTANTLY and people who call aren't misled by their own assumptions.  i don't WANT to do what a lot of providers do and try to lead clients down a rose-strewn path of thinking they're going to get something they're not.  i tell people up front "no full service", and yet there is still room for confusion?  and really, since when does a BJ not qualify as "full service"?  that's what blows my mind (no pun intended

i actually don't judge escorts at all, by the way.  does that mean i don't have some cynicism regarding prevailing attitudes that their net worth is based upon how many different sex acts they are willing to perform, more importantly than their beauty and charm?  i actually wish for the sake of FS providers that review sites were kinder and more understanding of your being out on the line and needing discretion, but nobody seems to worry about that.  when i read, "and then i banged her doggy style for a while until she asked me to cum all over her creamy tits", i feel sorry for ALL of us.  what happened to you girls just being beautiful and enjoying your work and clients understanding with a discreet wink and a nod what goes on?  when did it become something where you are described (and thus the rest of the providers closely associated, as well) in these lurid graphic terms?  i know i'm old school, but i still subscribe to the axiom "What goes on in Vegas STAYS in Vegas."  i mean, would it be so terrible, really, if a client had to actually come SEE you to find out what the exact circumference of your vaginal opening was?  even in the adult world, isn't some mystery still sexy?  

and you DO know that LE peruses this site and reads these reviews, right?  that when you're standing there in court in your understated little pink suit with your halo all polished up going, "No judge, ah've NEVER done anything like that", the prosecution can say, "Well, it's funny that we've got these 25 reviews that say otherwise"?

i've been giving some thought for some time now to starting a new review site called TASTEFUL Erotic Reviews.  of course, nobody would probably use it...  and someday when i'm running that house out on the plantation surrounded by fragrant magnolia trees and serving our 'gentleman cah-lers" mint juleps on the veranda, my girls will be sexy as hell AND well-respected, tigers in the bedroom and does in the street.  if somebody wants to be a silent partner, i say it's high time we brought back the leather club chairs and the jazz pianists and the single malts and cigars.  we've ridden the train of total immersion just about as far as it will go, and i don't see anything sexy or innovative going on now that even holds a candle to the days of yore (and i'm not even that old, i'm just nostalgic).

i personally think that escorts who are comfortable with FS are simply making that choice, and if it works for them, fine.  i don't judge clients for choosing FS or women for providing it, i just want everybody to go ahead and do that when that's what they're in the mood for, and then call me when their back hurts, not when they need a BJ.  

i just got an e-mail from a client asking me if i couldn't modify my attitude about offering oral in order to "make him happy".  if a client is asking ME to do something against my interests and will, the thought of which makes me cringe, in order to make HIM happy, i know there is an element of that in FS providers' lives.  i don't judge you, but i do feel for the day when you will look back on your time in the life and have a different viewpoint about it than you do now.  believe me, i know.  also believe that not only do i not feel judgmental, but i really am in no position to do so, so the comments about my being condescending and judgmental aren't even remotely applicable.  i'm just tired (weary, really) of trying to make it clear:  i do one thing, she does another thing, choose please, and everybody's happy.  

i ENJOY wholeheartedly the whole gamut of massage, of touching, of hugging and stroking and being close and nurturing and warm.  i just cannot have a client inside any bodily cavity of mine without being in love.  it is too intimate, and that doesn't reflect on anyone else beyond the point that inconsistencies in what different types of providers do makes clients start saying that i should do something because "she does".  it's so funny but so wearisome that that sentiment and laughable tactic for coercion never goes out of style.  it's totally illogical, but it's apparently one of the few things that a client can try to use to pressure you:  that if you don't step up and push your own boundaries because now everyone else is, you won't have clients anymore and they will.  i know it works the same in FS, too.

it's not superiority, but there is a great deal more intimacy in having a client INSIDE you, regardless of whether that's your mouth, your pussy, or your ass.  clients who expect me to interact with them on that level have taken it clearly beyond the level where they are receptive, i am talented, and i work on them with my hands that have been trained professionally, while choosing also to include the sensual work, my choice.  it seems a clear delineation to me, but apparently not.  

and maybe there are other therapists who are combining true therapeutic massage with sensual, but i'm not seeing a lot of "CMT"s after the names on the boards or mentioned on the reviews.  and from what i'm seeing in the reviews, even though those providers are offering just that combination, in addition to not being professionally trained, they are throwing in oral services as well.  my contention is:  a therapeutic-only CMT is only going to give you a massage, but an escort is going to give you as much as you order up by choosing that particular person--choose carefully and the sky is the limit.  in between the two, FBSM USED to mean that you used your hands to extend the concept of the therapeutic-only massage to something additionally sensual, NOT throw in a blow job.  why not just call a provider who offers oral an escort, and modify that by saying she is oral only, and then her ad can let her clients know she throws in a rubdown, too?  at one point in time, or maybe just in other cities, that USED to be what full body meant, sans oral, hands only, otherwise you were an escort on one level or another.  

so what i do is, in fact, based on my professional training and my love of massage (which is why i pursued the training in the first place), which is not an attitude of "superiority", but professional pride.  and yes, i do know about the "benedict arnold" attitudes of other therapeutic providers.  but since my professional peers are held at arms length due to the sensual aspect of my work, my circle of friends consists of people who have nothing to do with therapeutic massage OR the adult world, just normal people doing all kinds of different things for a living, so i don't feel alienated or the need to be closely ensconced in either world, i've got a support network that gives me the balance from both worlds that i need.

now that i think about it, maybe what has happened with full body is the declining economy.  i know when i came back to the adult biz it was during the clinton administration, and i was amazed that there were people offering just FBSM, so i was able to be very comfortable with it.  are people offering and expecting more from everyone now because of leverage and financial pressure?  all the more reason for me to go back to a therapeutic clientele.

everybody play safe, and i do not judge you, i just wish we could keep the categories neat so everybody, including the clients, could know what to offer and what to expect.  clarity, not mirages...

-- Modified on 12/5/2004 11:32:42 PM

-- Modified on 12/6/2004 12:27:14 AM

thank you!  but i wasn't attempting to advertise, so if you'd like to e-mail me, i'd be happy to.

Love to email you.  What is your email, url, working name or other form of looking for you?

hee!  you've got a point  i still miss that squirrelly bastard, though.

So, How does one send you an e-mail Ms. CMT?

oh, i meant through here.  don't i have a mail icon like everybody else?  i didn't really come on here for promotion, not really a regular chat room/message board/IM kind of girl, just stopping by temporarily to clean up a few indiscreet, albeit primarily flattering, messes.  prefer to spend the bulk of my time not in front of a screen.  so i'm only moderately technologically advanced.  but i thought you could mail me internally?

if you look around, i won't be hard to find, or i can tell you through mail here, but i do want to keep my posts separate from everything else.  as george costanza in his infinite wisdom said, "When worlds collide!"  

I can make this easy for you.  You're preaching in the wrong place.  I sympathize with your plight, but you're targeting the wrong market.  If you're trying to advertise legitimate sensual massage on Eros, you're probably still in the wrong place.  Let's face it, it's a  directory for escorts and massage providers that want to experiment with being escorts or are too afraid to declare themselves as escorts.  The same thing applies here.  You're worried how you are being reviewed against FS escorts.  Members of this service are either interested in escorts or they're interested in getting partial escort services from massage girls because the rates are cheaper.  No wonder you feel like you're attracting a bunch of bottom feeders.

If I want a massage, I find the best CMT I can find.  I've traveled half away across the country over a holiday weekend to see really great massage therapists.  When I want FS, I see an escort.  I don't go for the massage.  If I get a nice back rub between pops, well that's just a little icing on the cake.  I would never go to a massage parlor, nor would I see an independent massage girl that provides extras.  If I do, I'm going to be disappointed all the way around.  Almost all massage reviews are about what didn't happen.

I know a woman on the far south side that is a CMT, is trained in a variety of disciplines, is totally attractive and works completely nude, never really touches your genitals, and gives one of the most sensual massages you could ever hope to have.  I don't know how many of her clients suffer from blue balls, but that's another topic.  She has a flourishing business, she doesn't advertise on any of the adult service web sites, and you won't find her name here.  She does have her own web site with testimonials on it and she probably advertises occasionally somewhere.  Do you have a URL to your own site or an add posted somewhere?  I'm sure some of us here would like to take advantage of it.

i never meant to imply that i'm "self-service", so frustrated clients, no...

and yes, i KNOW that TER is the wrong place, that's why i keep BEGGING my clients not to review me here.  i only gave these guys my credit card number so i could read FOR MYSELF the reviews (four as good as you can get for massage, one disappointed because i wasn't FS--again, where's the surprise) that were posted, regardless of how many times i said "Don't review me".  i've asked them to delist me TWICE in the past THREE months (and yet the FAQ says that if a client sends in a review for a delisted provider it will be rejected???)  apparently their memory is far shorter than that.  so now i plan to stay on top of the situation, and make it my life's work to find out just how many other unauthorized references of me there are out there on the web and knock them down.  i just found a post that was flattering, but one in which the clients were talking about my profile on a PERSONAL site.  and speculating publicly that i used that profile to try to get business, and asking each other for directions to my profile.  i'm not that cavalier with my CLIENTS' personal info, or deadset on "outing" them, and here's the secret of why i have an ad on a personal site:  for the same reasons as everybody else who's looking for someone special and who doesn't like to waste their time in bars!!!  in other words, it's PERSONAL!  this review thing is REALLY intrusive, and if someone who doesn't value their privacy as much as money is comfortable with it, great!  me personally, i didn't sign up for all the extra headaches just because i posted an ad.  i thought what i was doing, in really enjoying my work and my clients' company was POSITIVE, and that i wouldn't have to endure a constant fallout of negative BS because of it.  here i am, actually doing things exactly the way i say i will, focused on honesty and accuracy and not "bait and switch"ing or grabbing any donation up front or upselling or promising something i can't deliver, thinking that the delicate caution and discretion that i apply to my clients' personal lives is going to get rewarded by a "Let's keep a secret" mentality all around, since after all, that's how I treat YOU guys, but no...

i know you get fewer clients without reviews, which suits me perfectly, and i used to be far far away from adult websites and be directly on the search engines myself until, finally a year or two ago, i let people talk me into trying it (i ran into some girls from a major site and we became friends).  it's my own fault, really, for listening to people tell me how a greater number of appointments is better than not having to worry about LE or indiscreet exposure or constant coercion and bargaining for more.  it was funny that after i finally went up on an adult site, i got swamped with appointments and people asking me, "If you've been around for 6 years, where are your reviews", as if you don't exist without them.  i miss those days...

oh, and regarding my ad or URL, i'm not even remotely difficult to find (and believe me, you'll recognize me when you see me, i'm the one who's formerly sweet as sugar, now getting rather visibly grumpy  i'm not trying to be evasive or secretive regarding it, but i just took down more stuff from this site that i feel impacts my appropriate demographic market as well as my right to privacy, so i don't want to move in reverse and start putting my contact info here in the boards again.

but i will say that if anyone wants to know anything about the adult biz, you couldn't ask a more seasoned pro than me, i'm pretty much a career girl.  so even though the reviews do not interest me at all, the idea that i could field Q&A's is kind of interesting.  i always wanted to have some service where i could do what i could to help out newbies.  when i was younger, btw, i was wild, and i know EXACTLY where the other women on the site are coming from.  it's just that now i know what i'm comfortable with, and my boundaries are FIRM as they can only be when you've seen the grass on the other side, and nobody can sell you on it anymore.  and as my career has evolved, i have found many things:  how to be comfortable with who i am and not care about what anybody else thinks, how to capitalize on my skills and what i like to do instead of going "straight" and doing something that bores me to tears, among many many other things.  

i just answered a question from someone yesterday who e-mailed me about massage parlors, which i know very well, as i worked in them before i went independent, and i know ALL the formats for all the different kinds of places and what they're up to (btw, a lot of times the therapist isn't to blame when she disappoints you, the house won't let her do otherwise).  i would NEVER suggest to a client that he go to a spa (unless it's a legitimate one like Urban Oasis).  the cameras and/or peepholes in the rooms (they may be hidden, but they're there) prevent the women working there from making their clients happy.  they don't have a choice.  i can pretty much tell you about everything from nice strip clubs to small podunk ones, strip-o-grams and bachelor parties, old school houses and new school highrises, dungeons, upscale american bodyrub places and assembly line "spas", lingerie modeling studios (or as they're more commonly known--you name it.  one would think, on paper, that having gleaned that many hours in the field i would look like "Flo" from Alice or something, but surprisingly, if you were to meet me on the street and not know any better, you would think I was young (or, on average, 10 years younger, even though i make no claim to that) and fresh and innocent.  Part of the reason for that is that I do my job and then leave it behind.  I don't party or hang out with people I work with or use the lifestyle as an avenue in which to get more and more crazy (and I wouldn't mind hanging out with people I worked with, but in the past it has been apparent that they were into partying, where I was into museums and such, and it just doesn't work--I've been on the lookout for years for adult entertainers who prefer whole foods and museums to nightclubs--if you're out there, don't get offended, get in TOUCH with me, it would be nice to meet like-minded providers).  

Additional disclaimer:  I'm sure not EVERY provider is into partying, but since I don't party at all, even if you go to a club once every couple of weeks, you've got me beat.  I don't drink AT ALL, so if you have a glass of wine with dinner, again, you're way ahead of me.  I don't not drink because I'm uptight or recovering, I have entirely different reasons for it, and it's unfortunately no longer an option for me.  I don't want to trigger another round of "You're so superior" posts, because that's not what I'm saying.  Partying, LOVED it, at the time in my life when I was into it and could not do major damage to myself doing it.  For people who are into it, have fun!  I just have to live a different way, if i DON'T want to look like some haggard old truck stop waitress, and you know the toll that this business takes on providers who are in it LONG term (i'm not talking about a couple of years).  

i just want to see a few people who know me really well, limit my risks involved with new clients, be able to have my own life without feeling that every time i go to a museum or a movie someone is going to call when i'm in the car on the way and pressure me to turn around and go back home to work on them because they couldn't give me adequate notice to plan that instead to begin with...  SHORT-term dealing with all those things is fine, but when your business model is, as mine is, to just simply work rationally and reasonably, rather than to excess so i can swim in piles of cash, it wears you down after about...  oh...  say...  8 years, or so.  think about it.  every personal activity you have is interrupted by a phone call demanding your immediate attention...  every client you work on is pushing for more...  everybody you work on thinks that ONE small portion of what you so enthusiastically do is the whole enchilada...  people speculate openly about your personal business...  again, if i were expecting gobs of moolah and wanting to draw everybody in with my sultry wiles and mislead them to get what i could, i could not whine about anything, but i just want people to take me at face value so i can do my job and have a life.  i mean, after all, when i'm working on you for ONE hour in a full day, the remaining 23 should be completely free from scrutiny, they should be wholly my own.

in a word, my clients are never left feeling "blue"

how does one get in contact with you?

i know i shouldn't even be responding to this any further or letting it get under my skin, but the more i think about it the more it CHAPS MY HIDE that there is still this neanderthal sexist mentality out there, even in the adult business.  if you want a mute blow up doll who is bendable in any position, there are PLENTY of those options out there, and you have more than enough self-promoting come-hither posts that don't tell you ANYTHING about them to distinguish them significantly from anyone else (unless you consider "cum see me" original) to choose from.  not that providers ARE all just pretty dolls without a thought in their heads, but those that aren't usually succumb to the pressure to at least PRETEND they are, because clients with attitudes similar to yours don't want anything any more involved than that.  great, have at it!  as if everything in society weren't already dumbed down enough...

"She sucks!  She f cks!  Only $299.95!  First 10 callers get a "second pop" at no additional charge!!!"  That's fantastic, but some people just want a little more in addition to that, present company notwithstanding.  some providers might be "well read", and I'm not being sarcastic, just skeptical--but another provider's intelligence might lie in the realm of thougtful, insightful discourse about why the world (and the adult business) is the way that it is.  if that sort of thing bores you or annoys you, by all means, turn off the PBS and get back over to AM radio, but don't tell me what ALL clients or providers are or are supposed to be like.  choosing to be in the adult business does NOT by definition mean that you have to lobotomize yourself or avoid honest expression at all costs.  after all, i'm not boring you with all this while we're in the middle of an APPOINTMENT that you're paying for, i'm printing it in the boards, where discussion is SUPPOSED to be welcomed.  and if you see that my posts are too lengthy or proselitizing for you and you're so used to sound bites and highlighted blips resembling "news" scrolling across the bottom of the TV screen to want to read the whole thing, MOVE ON to something less informative and more easy on the eyes--it is, after all, a free country.  and for a great many people, what i know about a variety of things is educational and helpful, even if you're not one of those people, so don't try to censor what they might enjoy reading because you don't care for it.

and it IS possible to be very considerate of your client's needs and wishes while not exploiting your own boundaries.  it IS possible to be non-rigid, generous, and sweet (AND relatively quiet without letting somebody bulldoze over your own comfort level.  it IS possible to "shut up and f ck", the problem comes in ONLY when CLIENTS continue to push and verbally cajole:  "Can't you do this and this, too", when you've already let them know, verbally, nonverbally, or through your ad, where the horizon lies.  it's actually far more relaxing and laid-back to just go with the flow of why you stopped by in the first place, on how great what you ARE doing feels, instead of what you might be doing if ONLY you can talk her into it...

the idea that on this board or any other you are entitled to and expected to ONLY be a sexy tart without anything relevant to say beyond "Hi, I'm new in town, and I love to party with my girlfriends" is ridiculous in a free country.  sure, you want that mentality when you're going to SEE a provider, but in the meantime, there is nothing wrong with saying something different in a printed forum.

Tried PM...no listing for beelovely.  Tried reviews....same.  Love to pursue, but hitting a dead end.  Need help.

P.S. I am new to town... how do we connect. I am not a member so I can't back channel you. Your writing demonstrates your intelligence so I am convinced. Where can I sign up? I know, you are not hear for new clients, but you've piqued my interest. More hints please or hit me between the eyes.

Dear Beelovely,
I read your recent post, and your service sounds exactly like what i appreciate most, i.e. an excellent fb massage, and expect no more.  I would love to become a regular client, if you are interested.  I am a 50 y.o. white professional gentleman who is in need of a regular, raosonably priced masseuse.  email is [email protected].  Thanks.

Well BL, you were correct.  It wasn't hard to find you.  However, I couldn't find any reviews on TER.  Did they finally de-list you?  You must have at least gotten high appearance ratings because you are a total babe.  

You also failed to mention that you are a visitor in our city.  Are you coming back after December?  Inquiring minds want to know.

PS:  What's up with your web site?  It's not working today.  Maybe I just caught it while you were updating it with a new missive.  Just teasing.