So... I put up a profile and was browsing a popular 'arrangement site.'

Don't you just LOVE when people get into semantics....

FIRST... I notice, the website has a big *...saying 'If you are an escort, do not use this site.'

WHAT?    Ok.... ok... so I figured... I won't 'escort' here... I'm 'seeking an arrangement.'  I'll use my 'other persona,' aka, woman seeking long term arrangement...heck, even an arranged marriage, aren't they all? Really...

Then... I go on to preview gentlemen's profiles...and some of them are so shallow and naïve, that THEY say, 'no escorts please'.... REALLY?  LOL.... Wow, those guys, in particular, obviously don't know what they're missing... and obviously are too 'conservative' for me anyway

Then... I notice, they're really actually confused as to what an 'arrangement' may be...  

Anyway... I could go on.... but, long story short...  

I am EVER grateful for the arrangements I've encountered as an escort... some of them many, many years long and still going...  I love the open, honest, out front in the open kind of beginnings that our hobby lends to the relationship, or 'arrangement,' if you will

Thanks for letting me vent!

XO
Sarah

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Definitely!

Many guys on that site are basically searching for an escort but tried so hard to not to see it that way that they run themselves in circles.

Which is funny, you would think if you sign up for an arrangement you will try to be as clear as possible.

I had an SB from that site for a while and she was a really nice girl who did NOT see herself as an escort at all. Yet I paid per view just like with escorts... but she wasn't an escort damn it!

There are women seeking long term monthly support with no limits on the number of visits or real dates or whatever. So I guess that means they're not hourly-paid escorts, they're paid by the month with a flexible arrangement. My SB went out with me free of charge, the only time I paid her was when we had sex so it was definitely different than escorts we find here. Most of you complain vehemently about OTC time but SB's don't so that's one difference. Unless we pick up an escort there and then it's the same as here.

Anyway, I get what those guys mean when they say no escorts - they're looking for a monthly arrangement that's not pay-per-view and they know escorts are always pay-per-view. If not, you're an SB

-- Modified on 8/8/2014 9:02:28 PM

While some men may want to convince themselves that a SD/SB arrangement is not "paying for it", we all know otherwise.  However, the one area where I do agree that the SD/SB arrangement might be better is the lack of a clock. So once you make your monthly support payment, it would seem more "real" than making an appt where the length of the appt is specified.  But I suppose you could make some sort of arrangement with a number of escorts on TER if you asked.

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Thank you "Polish Pirate!"  I actually have no problem sometimes spending more time say for lunch, dinner or a drink, after I have established a relationship/friendship with someone... I guess I'm a little less typical of an 'escort' and often find if someone books 2-3 hours w/ me, it's often 3-5 instead... just depends on the chemistry/company... I often do NOT schedule anything after a multi hour appt as I tend to view this 'dating' as my 'personal dating.'   I've discovered over the years I have just as great, only often better, dates in this world than in the non-hobby world... there's just a deeper, more beautiful understanding of the male /female relationship here in our world than the traditional world... At least in MY experience... Yes... you've all spoiled me!

XXO

See my reply to Polish Pirate  I've touched on this that yes... I actually LOVE it when one of my 'hourly' friends turns into more of a friendship/arrangement without looking at clock... often, because I'm not the 'slam full schedule type'... if all is mutual and my new friend is single and can be seen in public... we'll grab a drink or dinner together, OTC (off the clock?)... especially if they've booked 90-120 min...it may turn into much longer if the chemistry is right...

XO

and because frankly nobody wants to date me.  

In all seriousness, dating is a losing proposition for me right now. I have to do all the things I would do for a date with a client including shave my legs, put on makeup, blow out my hair, choose stylish clothing. etc. Then I have sit through a boring dinner at a mediocre restaurant, listen to them talk about their kids about whom I will never care, roll my eyes when they talk about their other dalliances ...for free? AND, with the expectation that I will have sex (most of the time really horrible sex) with the guy on the first date?  No thanks.  

I genuinely enjoy my clients and their company. Our relationships are uncomplicated and honest, and I am grateful for that.  

I am well aware that I will grow old and be alone but it beats the hell out of all other romantic alternatives.  

p.s. I totally understand why men choose the hobby over dating. I know the flip side and it ain't pretty.

So true!!  All of my needs (personal and otherwise) are met perfectly via my companions here   I think it also makes for more enjoyable 'sessions,' as I'm usually 'ready and wanting,' on the flip side...  I'm not longing for companion or sex aside from here, as I'm totally fulfilled.... And like you said, "I genuinely enjoy my clients and their company. Our relationships are uncomplicated and honest, and I am grateful for that."

I must say, you're probably wrong about 'growing old alone,' because when that time comes, there will maybe be the perfect Divorce' who is tired and ready for something refreshing or just someone to sit next to on the rocking chair

One day....  but yes...for now, gratefully enjoying the journey...

The nice thing about an SD (who wants you to see only him,) is that when done properly, you have an even flow of income/security without many expenses. It is way easier to accomplish goals, avoid risk, safe time, and save money... Even if they're not paying hourly. Though more work actually being with the guy, hopefully it doesn't feel like work as much because the two click. You also save a lot of work marketing and planning. (Unless you have a guy who wants you 24/7. )

The SD may do an arrangement based on how much he projects he will need you. I.e. Twice per month, (which for me would never be monogamous because I need way more sex than that lol.) to once a week, thrice per week, or on-call 24/7. (I have arrangement opportunities based on monogamous vs not monogamous, because there is a huge difference.)

Here are a few ways it's worked for me, but I'm only listing the ones that were legit.
There are the non monogamous SD's who don't like to be calked SD's (but they are lol.)
Met this type through the hobby
Guy 1. Pays per appointment, but appreciates that we clicked and we call each other to go out to eat, to a movie, even to a weekend getaway, just for fun (he always paid for the meals but I did for fun every now and then.) He paid all my bills the two months I was with him, bought me stuff toward some goals I had, provided housing, let me use his car, his place to chill at while he traveled, took me shopping, tough me how to dress more upscale, and was just fun as hell to be around. I look back and kph age no idea how I landed that lol. But because I knew that he was taking care of me in a serious way, I had no problem taking care of him, and I'm not talking $500 here and there.  

Guy 2. Client who also bought me things toward my goals, (no, no Louboutins, sorry lmao,) paid some bills, paid for a few needs, and funded beauty stuff. Paid for rooms, etc. Huge, nice gifts with a smile. He still gets emails all the time, he still gets to experience my WTF moments, haha, and we go to lunch sometimes. He still takes care of me for fun every now and them, but the client/provider relationship has passed.

Both I discounted on appointments, did a ton of OTC time with them, and we naturally got along and had a ton of fun together, so it wasn't really OTC IMO. Just a lot of fun. If they invest in me, I have more time to spend with them and not worry as much about being available, so we would go out.

Guy 3. Nice condo he owned for free for me to be available on a scheduled basis 1-3 times per week. I could see others. Kind of a nice Incall deal, but the places weren't in a prime location so I declined. Nice guy tho.

Monogamous (before I learned about escorting):
This ranged from a condo and Dar, along with help with education, an allowance, and paid traveling, investments toward future goals, etc. I always cut those off because they weren't natural and I was new at it. I came from a background of always paying for my own stuff. I didn't like that anyone could hold money over my head, hence, why I like having hourly or package rates. No gray areas.

 
The ones I immediately cut off were the ones who tried to use money to manipulate me or pay to say shitty things to me. I just can't tolerate it and I'm a little too honest about how things make me 'feel' when I feel manipulated or controlled.

The ones I've gotten along with the best happened naturally and when I think of them today, my heart squeezes in appreciation and just memories of the 'good ole days'. Though I wasn't in love per se, I was definitely fond of the tight friendships and laughs we had together.  

The hardest thing about finding a good SD is the saying goodbye when circumstances force it to happen. They did always come at the right time, which is kind of cool.

Just Note: what I do not like about the websites dedicated to arrangements is that they want unprotected sex. I don't think it's safe, and if the guy trusts me, who else is he trusting? I save that for when we both have been dating for six months outside of a working relationship and are headed toward very serious things.

Xoxo,

Courtney Ova

-- Modified on 8/9/2014 6:11:55 PM

but it's way too long for my AADD-ridddled mind. I'll read it in pieces over the next few days

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