Hi all,
This newbie hobbyist is looking for a little advice. I've already received plenty by just reading postings and being a diligent lurker on this board. I found the provider I wanted to book time with and she'd be blessed (or is that cursed?) as my 1st review.
So as a good student, I followed your excellent advice and I rec'd my RS2K verification. And as stated found a well established provider with stellar reviews and a board presence. Booked in advance and communicated throughout the day to ensure we had a confirmed appointment. Drove 1-1/2 hrs to the designated general area. Long story - but my hometown is absent of quality providers.
For my troubles, I was thanked with the dreaded NCNS. Three days have elapsed and I've received no apologies or explanation. I get it - shit happens. I'm a big boy but isn't an apology warranted?
So now two questions:
1. Could I have done anything differently to avoid this?
2. Should I give her name out to ensure the next hobbyist knows better?
Appreciate any and all thoughts....
You say three days have passed, have you telephoned or texted her? Sent her an email or somehow tried to make additional contact with her? My guess is you have tried.
While you are correct in saying that shit happens, and we all have our personal lives to contend with, sometimes patience is best in these situations. If she has stellar reviews and a good board presence she will more than likely eventually respond. One never guesses as to what may have transpired however, I'm sure she does not want to blemish such a great reputation for one mistake.
If after a week of no response I would put her information out there for the board members to see. Sometimes, surprisingly so, this is what it takes to get a response.
I hope you two can work out the issues concerning the NCNS and she in turn becomes your all time favorite. If not, let your fellow members know of the situation so they don't have the same situation happen to them.
Best of Luck,
FT61
FT,
I did indeed leave a single vm as well as a single text. I'm afraid that any addt'l communication from me takes me from the disgruntled customer category & puts me in the creppy stalker category.
I'll take your advice and give it a week.
Re putting her info out there for others to see: it's the right thing to do you're correct. My only reluctance is I don't want or need the drama.
On the other hand, I owe it to everyone who's given me all their years of wisdom & experience.
Thanks.
Sorry man but I don't have VIP.
That is a problem if you are trying to do any research on a lady. Perhaps had you read some reviews (and been able to PM with reviewers) this could have been avoided.
He did say he read 'stellar' reviews (can't see scores without vip), he could have bought a 1 or 3 month membership, researched her and others extensively and then expected to carry on his VIP with reviews. In the meantime it may have expired.
I don't see anything wrong in posting about your experience. However, keep in mind that if she is well reviewed as well as well liked that there will be "White Knights" to defend her, so be ready since you do not have a history or presence here yet. If you have PM, message me. I can make some reliable suggestions.
In my mind, I believe in the old standby, "Do onto others as you would have done onto you." Common courtesy ain't that hard, dude. Move on and learn from your experiences. Plus, research, research, research!
XXX-Giselle
You said you gave her RS2K info for verification. You also said that there weren't decent well reviewed prostitutes where you are located.
Obviously your name isn't John Smith from chicago but rather something like Cornelius McGillicuddy in Jasper, Indiana.
Odds are that she can with your name and city she can easily find our your home address and phone number.
As Sage said earlier there will be many white knights if you say something critical of someone with a board presence. Personally I hope you out who did that. However you need to be aware of the potential negative consequences of doing so.
I agree with ChicagoCPA. Its beneficial for a new monger get VIP. You can have some back channel messaging and get better intel.
Good luck.
It's also possible she met up with something bad in her life. I can think of car accident, arrest, family emergency, etc. So give her some slack, and maybe she'll contact you in due time.
Oh I agree its possible she will contact him in the future. Therefore he should wait a week from the NCNS before outing her. My point still stands though he should be aware of the risks of saying something negative. Heck I've seen some women here blow a gasket because they got a '6' or '7' and they felt entitled to receive a higher score. I imagine the vindictiveness would increase over outing a NCNS.
This happened a few weeks ago on a review that had something like a 7/9 score with a brief mention of the lady's figure, the lady's next few reviews were 10/10 and written like novels.
The same thing happened to me on my first visit to Chicago. I was also a member of RS2K with references from Minnesota and a well-reviewed lady NSNC'd me. After a few months, I contacted her again with better local references, and she agreed to finally meet. I found my new ATF, she explained her reasons in person and DID she make up for past wrongs.
So maybe, get some local reliable references and she will feel more comfortable with meeting.
With all due respect diggstrenches06, that is no fucking excuse. If she didn't feel safe with that guy and didn't want to make an appointment she could have fucking called or emailed and cancelled.
Its great that it worked out for you and you have an ATF, but that is no damn way to do business. If a woman is uncomfortable seeing a guy she should either a) not make an appointment or b) cancel it.
A simple email "hey, something came up and I won't be able to see you would suffice.
I totally agree with you, no way to run a business! I was in the same position as the OP; should I post about the NCNS? Would it help my position? Probably not, cuz I rarely post or write reviews so my creditability is not that positive. But......
I really wanted to meet this lady. I understood my references were out-of-state, the state of the hobby in Chicago was high LE activity at the time I visited so I can understand why she might of had second thoughts about meeting someone with little visibility on TER and no local references.
Still no reason for NOT calling but providers get second thoughts, like the hobbyist. No, I am not a white Knight. I just understand about NCNS, cuz beyond my control, I had to pull a NCNS once with a lady. She was very understanding about my situation and agreed to see me later. So things do happen.......
Yes, she should call him and explain. BTW, I drove 5 hours, not counting the city drive!!!
However, the point of writing reviews and posting information here is not for self gain, it is so we as a hobby community can use this information to make the best informed decision possible when we choose a lady. IMHO not outing a provider only encourages bad behavior in this situation
Doc
I really wanted to meet this lady. I understood my references were out-of-state, the state of the hobby in Chicago was high LE activity at the time I visited so I can understand why she might of had second thoughts about meeting someone with little visibility on TER and no local references.
Still no reason for NOT calling but providers get second thoughts, like the hobbyist. No, I am not a white Knight. I just understand about NCNS, cuz beyond my control, I had to pull a NCNS once with a lady. She was very understanding about my situation and agreed to see me later. So things do happen.......
Yes, she should call him and explain. BTW, I drove 5 hours, not counting the city drive!!!
ya u should putt her name out that is unacceptable, UNLESS u asked personal security questions then i would probably stop respoonding too.
This newbie hobbyist is looking for a little advice. I've already received plenty by just reading postings and being a diligent lurker on this board. I found the provider I wanted to book time with and she'd be blessed (or is that cursed?) as my 1st review.
So as a good student, I followed your excellent advice and I rec'd my RS2K verification. And as stated found a well established provider with stellar reviews and a board presence. Booked in advance and communicated throughout the day to ensure we had a confirmed appointment. Drove 1-1/2 hrs to the designated general area. Long story - but my hometown is absent of quality providers.
For my troubles, I was thanked with the dreaded NCNS. Three days have elapsed and I've received no apologies or explanation. I get it - shit happens. I'm a big boy but isn't an apology warranted?
So now two questions:
1. Could I have done anything differently to avoid this?
2. Should I give her name out to ensure the next hobbyist knows better?
Appreciate any and all thoughts....
I think you should definitely get the word out that she NCNS.
If I understood your post: you drove a total of 3 hours! And that is not counting whatever time I'm sure you lost waiting for her once you got there.
It sounds like some others here are trying to give her way too much benefit of doubt- unfortunately, NCNS happens very often. You're new, but if you continue to hobby you will encounter NCNS, fake pics, poor service, upwelling, etc
I was just burned myself a little over a week ago by a girl with stellar reviews. Called her for info, but she was a bit inconvenient to get to. She convinced me to see her. Once there, no answer. Waited and called- nothing. Yes, I will get the word out. And it ended u ponly took me 20mins to drive to her, to my surprise traffic was flying.
Sometimes girls double book- so it turns into a "first come, first served" situation. Other times they call you back and say they didnt notice your call. But lets be real: if you had an appointment she should have been expecting your call- so that excuse is not acceptable.
Maybe she had an accident, or an emergency... BS, brother- they do it all the time. If guys call them out on it maybe they will think twice about flaking out so much. Also, this makes men appreciate the ladies that act professionally, give good service, use real pictures, and do not flake out on you. That is the whole point of sites such as TER
What if you did see her and she treated you awful, gave bad service, cheated you... What excuses then? "Oh, maybe she was just having a bad day" Come on!
I am not 100% on this sites rules regarding NCNS, but I recently read a review that described the exact same situation- where the girl never answered. If it NCNS reports aren't allowed, they should- as this constitutes poor service. There are also other alternatives where you could definitely post review of this experience, though TER is the best!
As far as retaliation? Just wait for a couple of weeks and post it then. I seriously doubt shell go hunt you down. Just don't post using you actual name, or don't mention rs2k, create a new user account if you have to.
Lastly, to try to avoid this: your post clear if you called her right before you were leaving to meet her. If it takes you an hour and half let her know, and tell her you will call when you're a half hour away to follow up. Girls get no shows too, that's why some don't respect hobbyists' time.
Don't sweat her, there are a lot of good girls out there with good reviews. Wish you had PM's and knew what you were looking for- so I could make some recommendations
Good luck, sorry for the long post
If I understood your post: you drove a total of 3 hours! And that is not counting whatever time I'm sure you lost waiting for her once you got there.
It sounds like some others here are trying to give her way too much benefit of doubt- unfortunately, NCNS happens very often. You're new, but if you continue to hobby you will encounter NCNS, fake pics, poor service, upwelling, etc
I was just burned myself a little over a week ago by a girl with stellar reviews. Called her for info, but she was a bit inconvenient to get to. She convinced me to see her. Once there, no answer. Waited and called- nothing. Yes, I will get the word out. And it ended u ponly took me 20mins to drive to her, to my surprise traffic was flying.
Sometimes girls double book- so it turns into a "first come, first served" situation. Other times they call you back and say they didnt notice your call. But lets be real: if you had an appointment she should have been expecting your call- so that excuse is not acceptable.
Maybe she had an accident, or an emergency... BS, brother- they do it all the time. If guys call them out on it maybe they will think twice about flaking out so much. Also, this makes men appreciate the ladies that act professionally, give good service, use real pictures, and do not flake out on you. That is the whole point of sites such as TER
What if you did see her and she treated you awful, gave bad service, cheated you... What excuses then? "Oh, maybe she was just having a bad day" Come on!
I am not 100% on this sites rules regarding NCNS, but I recently read a review that described the exact same situation- where the girl never answered. If it NCNS reports aren't allowed, they should- as this constitutes poor service. There are also other alternatives where you could definitely post review of this experience, though TER is the best!
As far as retaliation? Just wait for a couple of weeks and post it then. I seriously doubt shell go hunt you down. Just don't post using you actual name, or don't mention rs2k, create a new user account if you have to.
Lastly, to try to avoid this: your post clear if you called her right before you were leaving to meet her. If it takes you an hour and half let her know, and tell her you will call when you're a half hour away to follow up. Girls get no shows too, that's why some don't respect hobbyists' time.
Don't sweat her, there are a lot of good girls out there with good reviews. Wish you had PM's and knew what you were looking for- so I could make some recommendations
Good luck, sorry for the long post
I doubt that any girls business gets better when they wig out on this board over bad reviews or posts. I think most of us hobby in part to get away from drama, not to see providers who manufacture and wallow in it.
to the person posting under the alias, thats about the most cowardly use of an alias I have seen in a long time, do you even have a spine?
since the NC/NS. Sounds like you did as much as you could to ensure a meeting would happen and you drove a very long way. Something serious might have happened but more than likely she got cold feet at the last second and blew you off. You did the right thing by contacting her only one time afterward, any more and she could argue harassment. It's a holiday weekend so give her until Tuesday to explain. Otherwise, tell us who it is and let her explain herself on the board.
Normally, this wouldn't bother me that much but the exceptionally long drive and the fact that you let her know in no uncertain terms that the appointment was set puts this all on her. She has some explaining to do and if she won't talk with you, than let her defend herself here.
I have had more than a few NCNS. They go straight to my Do Not Call list.
Outing the lady who is well reviewed and trying to make a living is not the way to go. I know you are pissed and have a right to be but move on. There are numerous other highly reviewed providers that won't miss their appointment. Move on and chose one of them.
Heard from my friend this am after five days. The good news is that she was not in an accident, nor was she arrested nor was she mauled by a polar bear.
Her response was short & sweet - "I apologize for the inconvenience".
No offer to make amends and / or try and make things right between us.
This is a lose/lose for me. She has 29 reviews to her credit. And I have exactly um let's see...zero under my belt. I can already predict the posts "where do you get off besmirching her..." blah, blah, blah.
As Ken the Hawk Harrelson is fond of saying "stick it in your pocket".
I'm moving on.
Thanks for all the advice. I'll be VIP soon and plan to use it wisely.
Peace Out.
Shoot me a PM once you have VIP access
Like I mentioned before: maybe I can recommend a girl for you.
And maybe give you some tips to avoid wasting your time on flakes, I know it can be very frustrating to have your time wasted like that.
Good luck, hope you find a good girl to welcome you into the hobby!