BIG mistake if this becomes allowed do not even know why this is now an issue in reviews
Tomorrow admin will be posting on the Gen board regarding allowing the discussion of BBFS on the boards. As some may have already noticed we now have reviews up that have bbfs mentioned in them. This is an important topic and everyone please participate in the poll and thread on the GD board.
I know this goes on. But, honestly doesn't this promote BBFS? As providers who don't offer this, we will be pressed more heavily than ever to provide this if it becomes acceptable behavior.
I saw on another regional board that a BBFS review has already gone up.
-- Modified on 11/21/2011 4:00:35 PM
I would most certainly NOT hire a lady to be with me and a friend if I knew she engaged in BBFS, would ruin DATY for sure if I knew I might get some guys man juice out of a providers kit kat. Nasty!!!
Glad to see BBFS mentioned in reviews. It's one more bit of information (an important one!) that people can use to make informed decisions.
I guess with the understanding that is available in some meetings, the discussion while disturbing my save some guys from those that offer it.
Also any reviewer discussing that he has taken advantage of the offering my find a smaller pool of potential new providers.
For just this reason!
yes Sin! you are correct and then it will be up to the provider to disprove it .... again the burden is on the provider as always
I do not disagree that many will.
I also think there are may who think they are bullet proof and God's gift to mankind that will want to share their conquests.
If it is included in the reviews, then I shall avoid any provider who offers it.
My first inclination was to ban the subject, but perhaps it should be discussed. If a provider wants to attract her target clientele that way, it's between her and her client. I would want to know if she offers it because that knowledge is critical in my evaluation/decision process.
This opens a new can of worms in my opinion .....fake reviews with guys saying they did bbfm to hurt a providers business it should not be allowed see PHX board where this happened to a provider and she warned us pryer he had threatened her with doing this it still took 3days to be removed it should have never been posted in the first place
I hope T.E.R. is prepared to deal with them. Many providers have experienced fake reviews, which are not generally flattering, from past clients with an axe to grind. Reporting that a "safe" provider offered BBFS could severely damage a lady's reputation!!!
BIG mistake if this becomes allowed do not even know why this is now an issue in reviews
Seems as if TER really opened up Pandora's Box with this one....
My personal opinion is to add it like the other buttons to every providers profile(DATY, BBBJ, Greek, and the like) and if that button is pressed then the ability to use an alias is surrendered and real handles only be used. As well, if a review is submitted without the button pressed(which will change the profile) discussing BBFS in the review only to be able to use an alias, the review gets flipped and button pressed or the author has the right to take down said review before being declined.
Alias and BBFS reviews would make things real hard for those of us who screen hard, thus creating a few less then happy campers along the way.
Just my thoughts, Sage
The hobbyist who sees a provider(s) who provides this service but does not review that/those particular "date(s)"? He may then see provider(s) who do not offer this service and don't want to be associated with the potentially dangerous fallout from such a service. Now you have mixed things that many may feel cannot/should not be mixed. It could restrict providers who do not offer this from seeking new hobbyists for fear of being exposed to something unpleasant. I hope I am not out of line here....I am brand new to all of this. Thank you.
To not have this as an open intelligent discussion is simply naive to think it isn't happening, and will continue to occur.
Every player in this game is going bareback with someone...it really is that simple. To honestly think that I don't approach every session with the understanding that you ladies are barebacking your BF, GF, husband or SO is simply unrealistic. I know you are, and I approach this game with that in mind. Also, you must know that I am going bareback with my SO. This is why we both use condoms. Isn't it?
And to NOT disclose in reviews if a gal is frequently engaging in this is also equally stupid. If this is part of her repertoire it should be discussed. The part that the gals are concerned about is that some jackass will report that a lady is BBFS when she isn't. And ladies, I suggest that there will be an outlier in your reviews if you indeed DON'T offer BBFS. But if you have 20 reviews, and one discusses BBFS do you think that the majority of TER readers are that incredibly stupid to not realize that the reviewer is full of himself? Frankly, this is the same reviewer who talks about how he gets you off 4-6 times in a session. And he himself may have 4 pops in an hour. Those are just as asinine to read...and most readers understand what this is all about.
But to pretend that BBFS doesn't exist is just naive. It's been going on forever and will continue whether we discuss it ad nauseum or not.
You have some very valid points I like the idea OF HAVING IT POSTED ON PROFILE no bbfs if this ends ups as part of review it should be added
.... I think having no bbfs or bbfs yes on a profile on a site like this is pointless hell most of the ones doing it cna just say they aren't.
I'm fine with a discussion of it happening even though we all know it does..... I just cringe at the thought of some possibly making it seem okay to do it with clients or providers just because they MIGHT do it in their civvie lives.
I have to agree with this post - ignoring an obviously important topic doesn't make it go away, it just means people are less informed. When has censorship ever ADDED to intelligence? You may mock my comment by stating that everyone knows the risks, etc. However, just look at how much has been discussed about hobbyist/provider emotional relationships to see how these types of discussions can be useful (as the have been for me) on what may appear, at least to some, to be no-brainer decisions.
A discussion of BBFS presents us hobbyists and providers with a chance to think about this topic in the (relative) sanity of a TER discussion board...so that we are not making significant decisions in the physical/emotional "heat of the action". I mean, when a beautiful and sexy woman offers BBFS after a glass of wine and 30 minutes of BBBJ, DATY, etc., who thinks rationally about what the impact could be when one goes back home to their SO, etc.? Better to have thought about this in advance.
This is what is so wonderful about these boards I first started thinking just one way that it was wrong to post BBFS and all the negatives involved then I read two very smart reponses that made me rethink maybe I am to hasty to decide just because we do not talk about does not make it go away was the line that really got me thinking as your Mod said" bring in on tomorrow" it should be a very interesting debate.....goodnight all
For years it has been against the TER rules to discuss BBFS in any context. My brief absence shows me that we have decided to take a turn for the worse, or the better, depending on how you view it.
In my tenure on TER I have had more than one providor offer BBFS and invariably each session has ended the same, immediately. Donation remained where it was left and I exited unceremoniously out the door with blue balls and a deep thanks that she was stupid enough to mention it early enough in the appointment before things got too far along. That being said, we will now have a very clear picture on a National level of exactly what women we are to stay away from at all costs. Of course the system is not perfect but no system ever is.
As TER progresses, they have made it easier and easier to segregate the women on my wish list. Those providors who who see men that see transexuals, now the women who provide BBFS and soon it will be much easier to make ones mind up as the elimination process is all but being done for me.
It can be argued that this is an early Christmas gift from the owners, or a wake up call to those morons who continue to push for BBFS during a session, in any regard it is at the very least, a constant reminded that while this maybe an enjoyable hobby, it is one certainly not without great health risks for those who make poor choices.
I hope everyone is doing well up there. Have an awesome Thanksgiving and please send down your deepest prayers, my family and I are in the greatest of need.
Thanks,
FT61
-- Modified on 11/21/2011 8:29:21 PM
After all the time Admin and the mods spent tracking down BBFS posters and removing their ads, now we're going to talk about it openly. As far as I'm concerned, let the feathers fly. Everyone knows it's going on and I for one will be happy to find out which providers to avoid for life. TER has been sweeping this under the rug for years and it's about time we know the risks we're taking.
Most of us guys don't get tested regularly because we think we're safe with the cover and we dismiss the risks of DATY and BBBJ as if they didn't exist. I betcha this will be the kick in the ass we need to get tested, especially if we find out that one of our partners has been doing it and we had no idea.
-- Modified on 11/22/2011 9:00:17 AM
As a hobbyist who has been around for "a while", I have seen this topic discussed a number of times on this, and other message boards, and have seen it alluded to unmistakably in posted reviews. The truth is that the topic won't go away, simply because the practice has always been there to be discussed. What compels a provider to offer it, and what compels a client to accept the offer is between them, and perhaps speaks to the question of a very human and very emotional element in play between a man and woman that transcends the provider/client relationship. Human relationships are, on so many levels, and however awkward the implications, quite like that.
Personally I would rather the matter not be openly discussed in reference to specific providers for fear of it becoming a "benchmark" that other providers feel they are compelled to match, just to be on the same "level playing field". Aside from the physical dangers involved, all too well known, there is the danger of an emotional "barrier of detachment" being crossed that a thin layer of latex provides. It is a unique and special person who can manage a successful life as a provider, especially as a long-term provider. I think the reason so many enter and leave the profession so quickly is because of the emotional toll it can take on those unaware, and unprepared for the burden on the psyche. Those who stay all seem to have a certain resilience, and emotional stability in common. Both traits we all admire. Even more so when worn by a beautiful woman.
The choice to cross that line, and go "in harm's way" should remain with the provider, and not become a matter of a "marketing and merchandising" policy position. There's too much at stake, on too many levels.
OK, I won't post again for another ten years. Promise.
Chicago Walt
You echo many of the same concerns we all share but add the human perspective.
I hope that the poll results are not truly indicative of public sentiment. The possibility of ballot tampering, e.g. multiple votes from individuals who wish to skew results is real. I cannot believe that so many hobbyists care so little about their safety as to risk an STD. Lets face it, not all STDs are curable with a shot of penicillin.
Lets hope that the level headed men keep steady on their course of using protection. Otherwise the flu won't be the virus people will worry about. And there is no vaccine or shot that offers protection.
On a another note, while less serious, how would hobbyists appreciate a call telling them they are going to be a daddy? It does not matter how the baby was conceived, you could be on the hook for a long time for child support. Remember that she alone can make the decision as to the course of her pregnancy.
Firstly, I have to express my dismay that TER admin decided to have this discussion this week of all weeks. The times around the holidays meant I was too busy to even see this thread until Friday.
To give my opinion, I would like to mention this somewhat censored theorem: Haven't you noticed that there are some complete f*****g dumbasses and morons on this board? Gentlemen and ladies both, lacking simple common sense and discretion.
I would like to paint you a picture: all the smart hobbyists and providers will start avoiding those that have admitted or allowed it to be disclosed that they offer BBFS. Sure, this activity happens behind closed doors with some regularity, or rarity, depending on your view. And, in the current climate, it's all very hush-hush. They allow some abstract discussion of the practice on the Porn Star board but that's about it.
So, what happens when it's out in the open? Well, remember those newbies that need to be guided through every single step because they are too lazy to RTFM or listen to our advice? The ones that need to be smacked in the head a dozen times before they 'get' it? Remember BP girls or ladies that are very new to the hobby and are the equivalent of those smackable gents? They will read about all this BBFS going on and assume it is the norm. The forbidden fruit has become attainable and they, in their very ignorance, will pursue it. Result? Mass pandemic STD outbreak. Luckily, most of this won't be HIV/AIDS but some invariably will. I'm especially concerned about the 40+ crowd of people that didn't have the same type of sex ed in school that a lot of us youngsters have. They're more apt to throw caution to the wind in their old age and think they know everything. Have you ever read an article about pandemic STD outbreaks in retirement homes in the post-Viagra era? I have... and EWWW...
How will this conclude? Well, BBFS coupled with the inevitable STDs is just what LE/regulators/authorities need in order to label the hobby a massive public health risk. Remember how the crime of prostitution has recently been upgraded in Illinois? Well, they now have more reason to go after everyone guns blazing. Did you know that spreading an STD when you had full knowledge of that STD is a very serious crime (especially with HIV/AIDS)? You'll also simply get those very disturbed people that will use this opportunity as an opening to wreak havoc in the hobby.
I don't like the prospect of listing BBFS at all. Who had the idea that the mob (as in "the masses") will react appropriately? The mob will do what the mob does best: act en masse in the manner of the lowest common denominator. You do not want to see the lowest common denominator out in the TER part of the hobby. Then, there's also the climate of economic desperation and the need to offer 'extras'. It just leads to BP for All. BP for All leads to: have you had an appointment with your local LEO lately?