that if you don't have anything nice to say ~ don't say anything.

I am not trying to start a flame war.  

And, since I no longer run Chicago VIP, I shouldn't worry about the email I received, but this really involves common decency.

I received an email from a provider today that one of my party attendees sent her.  

This email stated that although she was attractive, she weighed more than the majority of her pictures on her site.  He stated that it was extremely deceptive and to look for this to be a subject of discussion in Room Service 2000 shortly.

You know what?  Don't be rude.  If that is the case with a lady you have seen at a Chicago VIP event JUST DON'T SEE HER.  There is no need to send her an email and be rude.

I love this community and all that it entails but sometimes bad behavior needs to be checked and this is one of those times.

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Kelly

Perhaps you should tell her to update her website with photos that are current.  
It is not rude to say these things. This is not civie life, and the both of you should not be insulted by the truth.
Better via email then in a review.

It's not like the guy saw her for an appointment he saw her at a Meet and Greet.

It's not like he took one for the team.  

He neither lost or gained anything by emailing her.

The Meet and Greets were specifically DESIGNED for not only socializing but to check out and meet ladies that you may want to see at a later date.

Again, what purpose did it serve for this gentleman to email her.  If he didn't like her he didn't need to see her.

And I agree with Kelly!!

Let's say the lady in question is using pics that are old or heavily photo-shopped.  If the guy was respectful in his e-mail, I see nothing wrong with telling her that using deceptive pics is wrong.  It may make the lady realize that she needs new pics.  Otherwise, a disgruntled client may write a review and state it for everyone to see.

The problem here is the acceptance of the premise, i.e., that the photos don't match the lady. I was with her when she received the email, in fact we discussed it. I do not know the sender, but the comments were off base - she looks exactly like her photos, other than a tatoo has been airbrushed away for identity purposes. By the way, the comments were not respectful, but downright meanspirited.

Done tactfully, it's a fair thing to request that she update her pictures or risk being outed on the public board. If mean-spirited in any way, it is a bad idea. She may get away with it for a time, but that's why the board exists to share the good and bad. I have met providers in person after I had an interest in them but the in-person meeting was a bit of a downer. I think the best thing to do is honesty, but not at her expense or to stroke his ego.

I have to agree with you on this one Kelly.  There are certain ways to tell someone that they don't look like their pictures.  If the gentlemen said it in a rude way, then they are out of place.  If you say something to someone and you feel uncomfortable about what you said, then it was probably wrong to say.  Use common sense and like you said, it was at a meet and greet.  The gentlemen didn't lose anything.

If it's done with a little tact, it could actually prove to be beneficial to the lady, but being abrasive is pointless and unnecessary. You can slide a lot farther on bullshit than you can on sandpaper. It doesn't cost a dime to be nice about it.

I like that expression. Is that original?

I first heard that from the high sheriff of Hampshire County, who was teaching a class on effective supervision in the workplace. He had a lot of those expressions, but that's the one that's stuck with me for about 35 years.

At a basic level I agree with Kelly , sounds like the guy didnt handle himself well.

But to be honest I can identify with the guy's frustration. Ladies are down right deceptive with their pictures.   It's done intentionally too and  When a guy sees this time and time again it can start to ruffle your hobbying feathers a bit.  

I recently saw a well known and reviewed provider that visits regularly and was amazed at how photo shopped her pics were once I saw her in person. She was easily 20 lbs. heavier in person. Great provider and I had a great time but I still felt intentionally decieved because I what was advertised was not the truth.  (What equally amazed me too was all the white knighters who reviewed her never really called her out for it in their reviews. But that's another thread in itself)    

The truth hurts and if she's using less than accurate pics she has only herself to blame if someone holds her responible for it.

When I read stuff like this, I begin to wonder exactly what planet some people live on...I mean HELLO? Apparently the aliens that raised this guy neglected to teach him any manners or common courtesy. Allow me to help him out a little...you know, catch him up so he doesn't end up with a foot (or two) in his mouth again...the gent (using THAT term loosely) in question will, from this point forward be referred to as "Sparky". Here goes:

1. You were graciously invited to a private party hosted by Kelly-yes, you paid a nominal fee to attend, but it is still a PRIVLEDGE not a RIGHT to be invited. If for no other obvious reason, this should tell you that appropriate behavior is expected.

2. Meeting and chatting with a lady at the party, then later,behind the "safe" guise of an email, insulting her like you did is NOT considered appropriate behavior. In fact, it is downright RUDE and UNACCEPTABLE. Got that Sparky? (tempted to use the term "slapnuts", but am attempting to show restraint)

3. You are not going to be attracted to every provider, or hell, any PERSON (yep, yep, yep-holy crapolas-epiphany time...ready? PROVIDERS ARE PEOPLE, TOO-I know, crazy sh*t, right? *sigh* but I digress...). That does NOT mean that you write them after the fact to insult their appearance, or accuse them of misleading anyone purposely with their pictures. You did NOT schedule an appointment and she collected no fee from you. Thus, you have no right to say anything, much less something rude and "mean-spirited" to her. You lost nothing-perhaps you even GAINED some phony self confidence at the expense of this lady's feelings...

Congrats. Do you feel better now that you hurt someone's feelings? You must, otherwise, what was the purpose of being a complete, small-minded, thoughtless asshole?

4. I disagree with one of the earlier posts that said that comments like this are better said in a private email than in a review. If you feel that the disparity between a lady's actual appearance and her photos is significant enough that it warrants a comment, it should be made by a "paying customer", not some random schmoe (Sparky) who never even experienced private time with the lady, and it should be done in a tactful, constructive manner. If you are not a paying customer, then you have NO business saying anything. To be perfectly blunt, WHO ASKED YOU, Sparky? Lol.

Sorry, people who do or say mean, negative, rude, et al things for no apparent reason make me literally sick to my stomach. I feel sorry for them. Do they really have nothing else better to do than write emails to women they met briefly at a party to insult them?

Oops...uh...yeah. I think I just answered my own question. *shakes head* To the guy that wrote this email: I pity you, dude. I really do.

Amber

*crawls back under rock*

Right on! This guy is an ungrateful,  arrogant jerkoff who  likes to whine and complain and hurt peoples feelings to make himself feel important. Downright cruel and stupid  way for a human to act to a girl, especially in Holiday season when people are supposed to have warm hearts and others in mind. The due sucks. Plain and simple. Stick a fork in me , I am done. This is just the sort of man I despise who needs to get a life and try to be a little nicer to people and become more humble with himself.This whole ordeal is the highlight of his week, his 15 minutes of fame. Too bad he blew it looking like an evil turd.
Take into factor that hurt people hurt, others that is.. and this guy is probably feeling pretty misrable human being to so cruelly attack a girl he had an opportunity to meet at a kick ass party .
Sometimes when a bunch of boards guys get on someone..it
reminds me of a pak of  ravishlyhungry hyenas ready to rip apart. !Woo, scares me.
so dude:
Put a little love in your heart!
and dont go to parties, or anywhere for that matter... you will be sorely disappointed everywhere you go, fact of life.
disillusioned .at the very least.......