So all you other married fellas out there what's the strangest thing you've done to hide you're mongering from you're SO?

Here's a couple of mine.

I work a blue collar type repair job so if I come home after a supposed 12 hour day smelling better than when I left  home a red flag is gonna fly. I typically do outcalls so I can get cleaned up and changed before my "date" arrives. Then after she leaves I'll put the work duds back on and slip out a side door and go home. I keep a can of WD-40 in the truck and spray my self with it. Dirty oil smell is dirty oil smell to a woman so crisis diverted.

Once my cover was fishing with a guy at work that my wife will probally never meet, never use folks she might talk to for cover that's like rule number 1. So after several hours of wineing, dining and debauchary I throwed on the fishing clothes and was going to stop at the grocery store and by some fresh fish and rub on my arms and shirt to sell my story. Well we had trouble with the boat LOL so I was out later than expected (damn that was fun!!) so best I could do was a can of sardines from a gas station. Luckily fish smell is fish smell, she can't tell between canned sardines and High Rock's finest crappie.  

Good times good times!!!!

Lets see who else here is a creative type.