Contest entry - don't know how funny thi is ....

So, one late night waaaaayyyyyyy back I saw this woman who said she could squirt.  Well, she did, when I went down on her, more very very wet than squirting though.  But I digress, that's not the funny part.  She was also downing some vodka and tonics before and during our session, which should have been a red flag, but WTF. As the session went on, we did girl on top, mish, and then ended up doggie style.  This was very nice and after I came, I rubbed her back and ass for a bit and then pulled out.  Unfortunately,  the condom came off me and stayed in her, I could see the open end sticking out.  She turns around, goes to grab me, and sees that there's no condom on me.  

She FREAKS!!!!  Starts yelling at me about sneaking the condom off when her back was turned and jumps off the bed, ranting the whole time.  Now, I can see it dangling, and at this point, it's also starting to leak a bit, and I can't get a word in so I just start pointing and trying not to laugh.  She grabs the bottle of vodka, takes a HUGE swig, and starts coming at me, so I just yelled - it's still in YOU!!!  Pointing frantically.   She stops and looks down, finally seeing it, and the trail of cum she's been dripping around, and sort of covers her mouth with one hand and starts giggling.   I got dressed and got out of there ..... she was still giggling when I left.

But sadly true. Back in the craigslist days i answered an ad that said "W4M". She had me come to a real shitty hotel near the Boston Garden that was under construction. When I got to the room ,her friend exited it, and she really didn't look all that female. But the one I called did. I gave her the donation and started getting undressed but still had a funny feeling about it. I asked her to show me what was between her legs and...you guessed it...a big fat cock. I couldn't get dressed fast enough. After much debate about giving me my donation back, i show her the 'W4M" ad on my phone. She gave it back. NOT FUNNY AT ALL.

I think it's pretty funny in retrospect . I was at an incall at a fairly nice hotel during an earlier appointment. It was a very nice visit actually and we were both really getting into, perhaps a bit too much haha. Well we were enjoying each others company in the mathematical sense of 69 and I suppose we were both a bit preoccupied and buried between each others legs that we did not notice the room attendants knocking on the door. Well easy to say they keyed in and we both turned to look at an older hispanic women, who all she did was shriek and go, "i'm sorry, i'm sorry" and hurry out the door. At that point neither of us really knew what to do, but laugh, it was ridiculous. Easy to say, I pay attention to my surroundings a bit more now. However, that cleaning lady was surely earning her pay that day with the mess we made heheh.

I was looking forward to seeing this Girl whose photos I found irresistable.  I waited for a while to go see her because I had a weird feeling about it.  I finally called up and made a date and when I got there I realized that OMG I know this girl.  We used to work at a non-profit together and I had a mini-crush on her back then.  She remembered me and was concerned about my comfort and asked if I wanted to continue with the session as planned.  I said "hell yes" if that was ok with her, and she was very cool about it.  She told me she crushed on me a little back then, although I am not so sure about that, but all during the session we would break out in giggles every so often and talked about old times.  It was also one of the best times I had at a provider as well.

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Hi what was the result of this 'contest' ?

Great Idea !!

This contest was a great idea!!   Not to be crude, but prize collected gratefully yesterday!!!

Too bad that's the only really funny, true story I have.