Some are even completely unwilling. Is it really that taxing to provide references? I  don't know of any providers that don't require this. So, why not just make life simple for both of us?

Paranoia runs deep, into your life it will creep, as the Buffalo Springfield once intoned.

Well, it's not helping anyone not to comply with this simple request. If someone isn't comfy with the process,  sign up for p411. Then you never have to go through it again.  Problem solved on both ends.

Recently more than a few providers have been requesting from their previous clients gifts from their wish lists or gift cards or pay pal to their account in trade for a reference to another provider . It's the HOE culture, gimme, gimme, pay me for breathing. It's true.

That's insane and for the record I've never done that. I've been known to give gifts to my friends. No need to pay me to breathe.

I've been providing referrals to new ladies for 15 years and I guess I've been lucky. Not one has asked for any type of compensation.  

Very true ! They see it as another revenue stream, my guess is they think " umm if he is not seeing me how is spending time giving a reference to another provider helping me ? Let me expand the pay wall " . saw a provider recently asked for a reference after no problem . The provider she provided a reference to , was a NCNS for me . Asked her again for a new provider , her response was I saw you once , one reference. If you would like another reference see me again. Two other instances were not same but similar involving wish lists etc . Is what it is I guess

I think the nicer you are about these things, the more people thinks they are flexible.

Lately, I have noticed a trend where ladies either de-list or no longer want reviews. Ladies want to verify new clients for the safety. I get it. I have a P411 profile along with my TER profile. Unless you your are a single man, you weigh the ladies safety vs your need for privacy. A man's life is potentially exposed to ruin. The pendulum swings both ways though. Men like to see recent reviews. That's how we verify pictures are accurate and services are provided that we are looking for. What's good for the goose should be good for the gander. I know Erin has always been transparent about reviews and photos, so please don't think I'm singling her out.

But not a pushover....I just believe in good juju and we get what we give. 😙

Still, I've never crossed a boundary and never will. I have more people's personal information than one would imagine. Been to their homes and know the real deal. Not even once have you read that I've compromised anyone's privacy. I don't even care if you say you're name is Johnny Rocket. Just as long as a reputable lady says Johnny Rocket is a good guy. This really isn't rocket science.  

Again that's insane and I'm sorry you had to deal with the bs

verifying quality and well reviewed ladies.  
IMO I think gentleman should be more worried about those that NOT screen than the ladies that request truthful information.

Amen sister!

That makes my hair stand up. I'm so sorry you've encountered that. I see giving references as absolutely just part of the job. Yes, it's a lot of e-mailing, but it's keeping the sisterhood safe, which is our duty to one another. When I started out in this gig, I was amazed at how kind other providers were about references, and I continue to receive kind wishes from perfect strangers.

p411 is a great tool for advertising... P411  isn't responsible for my safety or well-being, I am. Which means I will be the one screening you, not P411.

first, last name & real phone number. That's right sir.  

Something that makes me very reluctant to engage in the process is the fact that e-mails never go away. I'll often hear the advice of don't put anything online that you wouldn't want to hear read back to you in court. That's true of criminal or divorce court.

Ernestine : let's face it there are less than honorable people on both sides of this aisle. To think that all providers are holding hands and singing kimbaya working as a sister hood is s nice thought but not reality . When they are rolling in bank,driving their BMW and taking exoctic vacations, they don't need to help anyone else and are myopic ." Don't dare call me to ask a question on my website", "another reference ? Who has time ? ", "But hey it's Tuesday ! Send me something off my wish list, cuz well .. it's me "!! View twitter  land and get a better feel of the SOP of some , but certainly not all .

I do help other ladies when necessary, support them and love my good friends. I roll to the bank, drive my BMW but haven't take an exotic vacation since Paris on Spring Break! Bummer! haha  

text message, quick phone call, etc.

yes, we need to keep each other safe, jut just from LE but also stalkers, rappist, thieves, and violent individuals.  

Yes, sunshine, thank you for stating the obvious. Not all people are lovely 100% of the time. I am simply stating the bulk of my own experience, as we all should.

Yes dear and I am stating what sometimes happens on the other side . Which I find enlightened. once a provider showes her true colors  it effectively reduces the amount of work for me researching the ladies I would like to see. I just may take you up on the HJ, it will be a good place to start ..

I'm not sure about enforcing a 1 to 1 ratio of visits to references, but there are *several* good reasons for limiting the number of references, or the length of time between a session and recommendations for future sessions. Most are more about ensuring the integrity and safety of all involved, not a lady's revenue.

I don't mind sharing info, but, as a low-volume hobbyist, references can be a problem for me if I only see providers a couple of times a year, and I feel a bit sheepish asking for them.  

😉

well, if he is contacting were reviewed and reputable ladies it should not be an issue. The concern is being raped, robbed, attack, murdered. That's why I screen. When my spider senses are off.. they re 99.99 % right.  

I do not hobby often...but willing share  who I have seen in the past to help with verification.

Because they don't trust that the information they provide will be kept confidential.  It has happened in the past when agencies were busted so it's not an unfounded fear.

Funny I never have to ask an attorney for references. They leave everything within the first email or even a voicemail-  

Also, I've always felt awkward asking someone I've seen for a referral. I think I am getting better about it as well as asking to be whitelisted. Also, I have gone for long periods where I didn't see anybody and that complicates things as well.

Unfortunately, there are many seasoned "hobbyists" who should know better yet think their handle alone or dated okays/ white list referrals from years ago can get them in the door. Or that they are above needing to demonstrate up-to-date verification.

I can kind of understand blocking someone who doesn't want to be verified..,but blacklisting them because they don't want to be verified is not appropriate.

..why are they in my inbox in the first place?

I can understand ignoring or even blocking people who do not want to give you information...,,but sometimes  people do have legitimate reasons for doing so....,but It is hard to empathize with someone who blacklists clients because they do not want to give you information...that seems vindictive.

Thank you for reminding me to "ignore" your posts.

..when it comes to the matter of providers' safety. And more importantly threats to that sense of safety. In the initial post I contributed to this thread, I outlined a situation where a potential client asks not just once or twice, but several times for a companion to still see him without providing the screening information she needs for her comfort level. It's fascinating that you're invested in defending the idea of a man not dealing well boundaries, disregarding a sex worker's policies, and being coercive.  

Oh, yes. I'm heading back home today after a two week werkation and I'm distraught that you won't meet me..

The question is are you willing to reciprocate? You want to feel safe... guess what, so do we!! Do we know if there is a pimp lurking and waiting to rob us or worse? Can we be sure that once you have our personal information you won't out us?? I already know your response. A reputable provider would never do that. I seem to remember a popular local lady blackmailing several gentlemen a couple of years ago. She was reputable, but for what ever reason....

Note to self:  Avoid Lena Duvall   Does seem very hardened and not very nice

most of the time its because they want work information or work email and things like that. Thats when things get very very scary.

..for sex workers and what's at stake for clients. And no, I'm not saying that clients don't face any risks. Sex workers face more frequent/ intense risks. That's clearly a longer conversation.

For me it is rather simple

I don't care if you work for Nasa or you polish the golden arches. I really just need one reputable provider to tell me that oceansea1312  is a good man overall. It's so simple and puts my mind at ease

With all due respect I am not affiliated with any agency and I don't need anything more than a provider reference which I will forget soon after we've met because she really isn't that important to me. I appreciate everyone's assistance. But,  we check refs every day.  It's impossible to store this information.  Maybe it's my brain and that lack of desire to store the info. Either way, I'm your ally not your enemy.  When you come see me or any provider, it should be a safe haven.  You should be able to say what's on your mind without fear of judgment.  You should be able to put your wallet down without fear of getting robbed.  You should be able to kiss and have foreplay without fear of getting sick. More over,  you should leave feeling better than you did when you arrived.  
I simply need assurance that something is not going to go horribly awry. I don't think that's asking a whole lot.

And never ever EVER documented in ink