Here is the question from both a hobbyist and provider perspective ...

Hobbyists: Pretend there is a provider out there that you have seen a few times and you've enjoyed.

Would it be possible for this provider to sufficiently incentivize you that, at least for a few months, you would see only her?

If so, what sort of incentive would be required?

I realize that the incentive could be as simple as shared worldview or as complex as a unique financial arrangement.


Providers: Do you see any hobbyists who see no providers but you?

If so, did you create a particular incentive? What was it? Why did you offer it?

If there was no specific incentive, to what do you attribute the phenomenon?

My basic thoughts: I would say most guys involved in the hobby have strong polygamous instincts so securing a monopoly on sex for anything longer than a couple of months would be difficult. The longer the monopoly, the greater the required incentive. Eventually, no practical incentive will work; except for those few hobbyists who aren't very polygamous in orientation. Any anecdotes that contradict this impression are welcome!

IMHO that's the reason I hobby. To meet new and interesting people. I would not be interested in having a "girlfriend." Heck I'll go and find one if that were the case.

I simply like the practice of being intimate with someone different and new. It's fresh and provides an edge to a monotonous lifestyle for some. Not saying it's me.

Plus, girlfriends provide the incentive if we want to be exclusive. We wine and dine them. Take care of the emotional and other needs.

Providers are great b/c you leave any physical and emotional baggage in the room.

More the merrier!!

all ppl who play here are as you would say "hobbyists" many aren't. Many are looking for one person who they feel comfy with who they can see on a regular basis.
Many of my regulars don't use ter, don't see other women in this business. Not everybody want variety.

...the term sugar daddy loosely fits the situation you describe.

to providers, and I don't want another GF or wife.
Those who are looking for relationships should stick to sugardaddy sites or dating sites.

I can fuck them leave them and move onto the next.
Ain't the hobby great!!

more often with guys that with the ladies. Yes, some ladies wind up with sugar daddies, but for most, it's a form of livlihood, and any one guy isn't usually able or willng to provide for all of their needs.

It probably happens more often that a guy will find a lady who does it all for him, and he's more than content to see only her for a period of time. I'm sure there are some guys who simply don't play that often, or can't afford it, and would rather see the same lady when they do have the opportunity.

All they have to do is be better than anyone you have ever seen or can imagine being with. I shop around from time to time. It always seems to snap me back to the girl that gives me a performance bordering on 10 or better every time. I like the variety but in the end I end up back with the one.

I think it is possible if the conditions are right.
Both parties would have to agree on ground rule of how this would work. Most important is if non of the parties involved break the rule. Now how many times have you heard of that happening.

I think we all have our ATF's and when we want to have a good time and not deal with any drama. These are the women we go back to see again and again.

But were all dogs and we will always be sniffing around to see what is out there

a bitch sniffing out a guy's dick! Nice eye contact too.

that is doggie position!!

Live and learn.

Totally agree. There is one girl I see that is just so much better than anyone else that it makes other experiences disappointing. I like to check out new girls but when this girl is in town there is nobody else.

stage in life?

Used to try a different flavor each month and was not terribly satisfied.  About 6 years ago I met a certain lady and it was like heaven.  For about the next 2 years, I would see her, most of the time when she came to town.  I would occasionally see others, but it was not the same.  Now I only see her, every once in a while we might invite a playmate to tag along.

Overall, I am very happy!

All she has to do is be so good at pleasing me that I am willing to forgo the risk and possible disappointment associated with seeing a new lady.  For guys who like variety this will probably never happen.  I prefer a few ATF's.  Several times over the years I have been exclusive with just one lady for an extended period of time-generally until she retired.

25 responses; isn't a full time paid girlfriend just called a mistress?

It has to do with the hobbyist seeing only one provider; with no constraint on the provider's activities.

Pretend that you hobbied as frequently as you do now; only every visit was with the same woman -- preferably a woman whose company you really enjoyed.

She would STILL be a provider and seeing all her other clients.

So she wouldn't be a mistress. Though, in a sense, I can see how you'd see it that way.

Why do ladies always think that guys who don't use TER are so much better than the guys who do? Is doing research really so bad? Is it because of the review system?

I don't think an incentive program works for that sort of relationship: it is one that evolves over time.

It seems that all hobbyists have their ATF's and it depends on the tastes of the hobbyist.

Bottom line is, no matter, enjoy, enjoy one provider, or enjoy them all

I do not believe that is what she is saying.  I don't think she stated either better or worse vis-a-vis TER users or non-TER users.

I just think she was suggesting, like in many things, there are many ways of approaching this business.

?????

What stage in life

I have a few friends that tell me I am the only one they see! They know I see others and I never involve myself in their business as it is none of my business.
I do offer incentives to long time friends, free access to my  pay website, rates that do not change even after 5 years!  Most of all I try to meet their needs when we are together!
I also frequently offer doubles with some known providers, but my special friends get access to a couple of gals who are so utr that only 3-4 friends have ever met them!!

Ciao!
Love, Penny XXXOOO

for me, same woman maybe 250 x over last 2 years....shopped the field   no one like this one in looks, talent......i am exclusive...think she is too......

Got that right Nicole! With having to worry about LE, pimps, or druggies, One nice lady who suits my needs is all I'm looking for.

Yes...

It's called a Sugar Daddy type relationship or a relationship with benefits.  Unlike the kept mistress, in this relationship the woman is reserved for an agreed upon period of time each week.  She is allowed to live her life as usual, but commits to being available for the gentleman as per agreement.

I believe many providers who have been on the scene for a while have had at least one, if not many of these relationships.  They are mutually beneficial for both parties.

Take for example a newly divorced man.  He wants to have fun but he probably is not ready to jump back into a mainstream relationship, especially if the divorce wasn't dissolved in an amicable fashion.  He may see a few escort ladies, and take a liking to one that he eventually has visiting with him weekly. This can go on for months or even years.

Often these relationships bring the lady into the gentlemen's personal life for periods of time such as companionship for business events and company for attending the theater and for fine dining.  It's more fun knowing you are going to get very lucky at the end of the night than playing the dating game. (In fact many men find these arrangements more cost effective)

Unfortunately, like all good things it will eventually have to come to an end.  Sometimes the gentleman gets too serious and the provider is not interested, and it is time for him to move on in the real dating scene, other times he just needs a change.  And sometimes they marry, if you can believe that!  Of course, I am just answering your question, therefore I am not admitting to being a part of any of these scenarios.

In my brief scan of the responses you've received, Nicole hit the nail on the head.  Some men just want someone they can trust and feel comfortable with that will not push the relationship to the next level.  The lady makes out, the man gets better taken care of then he ever would in a typical relationship so it's a win-win.  And yes, there are arrangements such as this which are 'Don't ask-Don't tell' as long as the lady is available for the same time frame each week.  

I guess a simple Yes would have sufficed, but as some of you gents know if you're not kissing me or sticking your balls or cock in my mouth I might just be a little verbal-Ooooooh Baaaaybbbbee!

Kate xo