Gents, I've seen the posts about 'enhancements', I've seen the posts about pregnant providers and now I have seen the posts about ladies leaving the biz and not wanting any more reviews due to family issues.
All I can say is, where in the hell is your humanity, your compassion, your sense of fair play. The more I travel the internet and look at boards like this, the more I believe that some of the men of the Boston hobbying scene are the rudest, most insensitive, most crass, most demanding and unreasonable of all hobbiests.
You pay these ladies for their time, for your hour, or two hours or your dinner date or overnight. You do NOT pay them for the right to ruin their lives, to belittle them as long as they live, or to chastise them or judge them. You particularly have NO right to judge.
This may be whisky that has me all wound up, but I happen to know, respect and yes number a few of these ladies as my best friends. The lack of respect and dignity that some of you give them is appalling to me. If a lady says, no more reviews, then get your testosterone under control and give up your 15 free days and honor her request. You paid for 30 minutes or an hour, you did not buy the rights to her life.
-- Modified on 2/4/2004 2:59:01 AM
Magnum,
You are a true gentleman. You are right on the money and thank you for understanding. I truly wish more of the Boston were as kind and respectful as you.
Jill
It seems like common sense, but unfortunetly I don't think the majority practice it. Now I'm not informed enough to make that indictment against the men of Boston, I believe it happens everywhere, maybe more frequently here???
To further your statement:
"You pay these ladies for their time, for your hour, or two hours or your dinner date or overnight. You do NOT pay them for the right to ruin their lives, to belittle them as long as they live, or to chastise them or judge them."
One doesn't have the rights to treat them with any level of disrespect during that hour, dinner date or overnight either.
I am constantly amazed at some of the stories that I have heard, and from some of the classiest woman I've ever had the privilege to meet, about the treatment and attitudes they have to endure. I'm a pretty average guy and you would not believe the increased level of service I've enjoyed just by being a gentlemen and practicing common courtesy.
The price we all have payed is that some very wonderful women and hobbists have disappeared because of it.
Remember - Arrive SMILING and your more likely to leave HAPPY!! (and smiles are free)
.02 NHughty
-- Modified on 2/4/2004 11:35:52 AM
As a long time lurker, who just recently met a lovely, sweet lady and totally enjoyed her company, one of the things I dealt with in checking the ground rules was the review. I told her that I felt she was well reviewed, and really saw no need to add yet another. She agreed. Two clarifiers: If she had requested one, I may have submitted it out of respect for her wishes. Secondly, had the session been unsatisfactory, I would still have not submitted one. YMMV. BTW, it wasnt. I am still smiling.
Personally, I do not feel that, be it here or the other board, that the VIP thing is a good idea. I have seen situations, one which involved the lady in question, where a bogus review was posted and I believe it had to do with being a VIP. I think it tends to play negatively to the guy who needs an ego boost.
I dont intend any of this as a criticism. Just an observation. OMR
It just seems that when it comes right down to it, we tend to forget that this is all about living out fantasies and having fun. As soon as you start to take this too seriously, then the fun goes away.
Let's have fun, guys... there's enough stressing and angst in our everyday lives. Let's give these girls a smile and some respect for making us feel good.
i agree , havnt posted in months , after checkng in a couple weeks ago i posted a few replies concerning one of the issues, was about to post what follows , but poor thirsty had enough so i didnt.....so....anyways.....keeping with the respectfull tone of this thread...IMHO...we live in a capitalist nation and quite franklly this is a capitalist website..the girls be a selling and us guys be a buying...you dont like the cup of "coffee" being sold...move on.. shared valuable experience is priceless...hence THIS website...and a occcasionally friendlly discussion on "preferences" or other off topics can be damn right exhilariting...the other stuff has no place here.......PATRIOTS ROCK
nice post, magnum.
i believe that people deserve respect until they prove otherwise. if you have a nice time with a provider and she requests no reviews, then why not respect her wishes? you can afford an hour of her time but you can't afford two weeks of TER membership? on the other hand, if a lady does not live up to her promise, then i believe my responsibility lies with my fellow hobbyists, and i will tell them the story no matter how she feels.
if a provider is retiring, what value does a review have to the rest of the community? the only reason to post it is for the free 15 days, you cheap f**k
TER: why isn't there a way for a provider to temporarily disable or somehow block reviews? it must come up with some frequency - she's having problems with a client, a boyfriend, family, le, whatever. isn't there a way that you can help with protection in this area other than requiring her to completely obliterate her presence from the board? no criticism intended, by the way - i love your work - just wondering if this couldn't be handled better.
Clarence,
I believe requests like this have been accomodated by TER if the lady requests it. Notice, even when a provider is banned, her reviews remain in the database. For instance, if Betsy from Boston is banned from TER, you can no longer access her profile but if Clarence37 had written a review of Betsy, this review would remain accessible under his review link.
All the lady has to do is write to Staff and explain the situation. If her review profile needs to be temporarily disabled, I'm sure that this can be arranged.
thirsty
Very well put old friend. Unfortunately a lot of guys think of these ladies as nothing but a mere commody. Something I'll never understand. They just seem to take real pleasure in bringing a woman down. It's not a matter of of opinion either as was stated in one or two of those threads. There is a tackful way stating an opinion and then there is a calous way of saying it. You're right too,it does seem to be a Boston thing these days. I'm hoping it's just the long cold winter.
I wouldn't go that far Smitty. IMHO, it's common in forums such as this. People write things that they might not have the courage to say out loud because they are emboldened by a certain level of anonymity. I don't look at all the boards here (or on TBD) but I've seen similar threads on Atlanta and Vegas.
thirsty
You certainly would have more information than I do about these boards. I suppose my main point is it just seems the rudeness and lack of civility has been more prevalent around here the last month or so. I like what you said about being more bold and courageous while being somewhat anonymous. I know that's true, but I sometimes loose perspective. I would never write anything here that I wouldn't say to someone in person. Even if I post under an alias.
-- Modified on 2/6/2004 3:52:48 PM
I agree with Magnum that we must treat the ladies in this hobby with compassion, respect and dignity. Heck, we should treat all people like that regardless of their background, race, religion and beliefs. I have had the fortune of meeting several providers who not only excel in their performance of the service they provide, but also treat their customers well.
I have been dabbling in this hobby long before the Internet and the sites like TER came about. The only means available to find providers before this electronic age were Boston Phoenix and other publications of that ilk. There were scam artists abound among the ladies that advertised in those papers, and I was victimized more than once by them. So I am very glad to have found sites like TER that provide frank reviews and warn us about the scam artists. If the members of these sites shy away from writing frankly about their experiences with the providers, we may as well stop using these sites.
I am a VIP member of TER, and I became the VIP member by paying for the privilage, not by writing scads of reviews. So the few reviews I have written, describe my true experiences and provide constructive criticism where deserved, so that the ladies can improve their services for the TER community. I would never hold a grudge or ill will against a provider who tries hard to please but does not come up to my expectations. However, if I smell a scam, I would not shy away from writing about it.
Magnum! It has been a while since I saw a post from you. Hope all is well with you!
-- Modified on 2/7/2004 2:21:24 PM
I just posted what I felt. It's nice to see that there are still some gentlemen on this board that have some respect for others. And it's nice to see Jill doing what she can to help a former employee. I wish corporations would do as much about their people.
So, I think I'll pop back into lurker mode and when I 'Get a belly full of beer' I'll pop back out.
Play safe, have fun, see ya soon
-- Modified on 2/8/2004 5:53:58 AM
