As a member of Fetlife I see a lot of BDSM photography.  And I have to admit that I don't particularly like what I see.  Why?  Because in most of the images the sub looks afraid.  In my experience, this isn't typical at all.  In fact, in most cases when sub is truly in sub-space, their face is serene.

But that got me wondering.  Is that just me?  I've said before that a great D/S experience always leaves me feeling like i've had a massage.  (Ha - well - one that leaves a few tender bits anyway). I do tend to fall into a place where within reason the Dom is able to take me pretty much wherever she wants to go.  If someone is performing an intense electrical experience or something like that, I may breathe more in an effort to ride the pain, but I am never truly afraid.  

Wondering how you guys feel about that?

...wood.

Couldn't agree more!  Just like a porn film where the XXX actress is seriously over-faking her orgasm moans (remember Teri Weigel?), most of these videos are not a very accurate depiction of BDSM.  I think that the submissives must either assume that they should look and act afraid for dramatic effect, or it's bad acting suggested by the filmmakers, but you are right.  Most live sessions I've seen at BDSM events involve heavy breathing, laughing or a trance-like "sub space", but not nearly as much screaming and fear as you see in these photo and video shoots.  Yes, people definitely process some pain with tears or loud vocalizations, too, depending on what's involved (i.e., single-tail whips), but I've had to turn off some videos because the submissive "actor" or "actress" was being way too vocal for something that I knew from personal experience barely hurts.

Based on some of the posts I've seen so far, that "acting choice" has a detrimental effect on newbies who might otherwise want to try BDSM, which is a real shame.

I share most dom(me)s experience that the dom(me) is working hard to get inside th head of the sub and earning her trust and her intense pleasure which the dom(me) shares and from this draws his/her pleasure, but I have been with subs who --while knowing deep down they are perfectly safe-- liked to feel they needed to be a bit "afraid": It gave then a feeling of losing complete control.  One sub told me she loved being helpless able only to beg desperately, lick, and kiss to avoid punishment.  She could only enjoy this with the deep knowledge that she was safe with me, but the feeling of needing to beg etc to avoid being hurt made her quite excited.  It is to subs and dom(me)s like this that these pics/videos appeal.

IMHO  

it depends on where you are looking for your photos and videos.  

Something put out from eastern Europe, where the "model" was paid $50, drugged and "Safe, Sane, Consensual" isn't in the vocabulary, something from the highly successful Kink.com or Brutal Master.com, or Infernal Restraints.  A lot of that content is not submissive/slaves with people they know and trust, they are doing hard core service for money and IMHO proving to the world how to the inth degree what hard core pain sluts they are.

Not the serene beauty of one person surrendering to another.

You have to take into account that people make content to sell.  They don't make it to be accurate or portray the beauty and moving power exchange of what we do.

Porn is made to make money as well.  i was quite taken back by the fake-ness of most of it.  It is funny to me.  One can only contribute as much authenticity as the producer allows because the producer is making this content to make money.

It all about the bottom line.

Now, someone may com along and make something that sells and show the relationship of a D/s dynamic that is built step by step, but, i think, that would take two people that have taken the time to create that being in the content.  Rome wasn't built in a day, content is shot in hours with strangers.

~a

Your images are beautiful ...

But I suspect you know that.

..wood

i love my work.  It is very kind of you to express your appreciation. i thank you kindly, Sir.