BDSM

Re: Rational kink
LilithObscurite 4562 reads
posted
1 / 9

Hi gents! I’m a femsub, new to the platform and curious about what men here with a dominant streak enjoy.

inicky46 61 Reviews 35 reads
posted
2 / 9

Have you set up a profile? I assume not because nothing appears when I click on your handle. You should go to the Newbie Page and read about how to get started here. Without a profile, an ad and reviews guys here won't have any idea what you offer or how to see you. So what we might enjoy is, from your point of view, irrelevant.

lester_prairie 12 Reviews 33 reads
posted
3 / 9

There is obviously a lot of psychological variance in dominant/submissive dynamics.  Speaking for myself, in my mind's eye, I view the submissive as secretly longing to be taken, owned, controlled, even if she never shows that on the surface.  So I think even by the act of advertising as a submissive, you set the stage for that sort of idea.  So that's good.
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I've only done BDSM with sugar babes because in order to establish a trusting relationship would probably be prohibitively expensive with an hourly escort.  So I am not quite sure how far it would be practical to go In that case.  
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I typically role play.  There is some scenario where they have to submit ... they are overpowered (threatened), they are blackmailed or extorted.  They can be kidnapped, bound, gagged, flogged to submission, etc.  Yeah, that's more extreme, but it is all role play -- no one actually gets hurt.

Valida 17 Reviews 34 reads
posted
4 / 9

I'm a bit different in my wiring/kink/preference from other responders:  I enjoy most just what you said, a woman submitting and surrendering.  I prefer to talk about limits and consent first, then ask her "Do you consent to be fucked while bound?  Do you submit to my sexual dominance for our time together?"
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Her affirmative answers make me happy and proud with a kick, and make me anticipate great pleasure with her.  I don't go in for role-play of extortion, whipping, humiliation, blackmail, or simulated rape.  I want her to submit thoughtfully and willingly to my bonds, be comfortable in them, and enjoy the stimulation that I give her and take from her.  
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As far as I can tell, there is no rational basis for this kink of mine.  I basically do with a helplessly bound woman just what I do with a willing unbound woman, so the difference to me is purely in my mind and imagination, I guess.  But I have been wired this way since before puberty.

lester_prairie 12 Reviews 35 reads
posted
5 / 9

Simone and Malcolm Collins have a wonderful explanation for the basis of fetish and kink -- they explain that evolution is a cheap programmer -- that arousal and aversion share some of the same "circuits."   If something is a little off in our wiring, we can end up with the opposite reaction to stimuli.  There is a very obvious trait of fetishes to be around things that other people find disgusting.  
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So basically if we have fetishes, probably born that way.  But having a reaction is NOT a justification for violating other people's rights.  Fetishes, therefore, like everything else, require mutual consent.  That's why in many cases role play has to substitute for real aggression -- the act of obtaining consent converts the actions into role play rather than assault, etc.

Valida 17 Reviews 34 reads
posted
6 / 9

In my case not a fetish -- I can enjoy sex quite well without any bondage (or any of my other kinks) -- it's not a requirement.  What you say applies equally to simple kinks as to full fetishes, I think.

LilithObscurite 42 reads
posted
7 / 9

I’m actually really struggling to figure out how to set up my profile. I’ve added my website, I have a few posts, none of that seems to show up.

mrfisher 111 Reviews 29 reads
posted
8 / 9

I always thought that to have a profile, a reviewer must post a review of the provider in question.

 
The information on that profile comes 100% from the reviewer, unless the provider or someone else reports a problem that something is inaccurate.

inicky46 61 Reviews 34 reads
posted
9 / 9

Sorry if I was imprecise in my language.

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