I hope this falls under BDSM, so I ask for your thoughts.
I'm getting more and more into the whole kink of rubbing bodies together with lubricants.
The problem is that the lubricants I like the feel of most because of their texture and mass (shaving cream, Vaseline, moisterizer, suntan lotion, shampoo, etc.) taste terrible.
On the other hand, the lubricants that taste the best (chocolate syrup, whipped cream, cake batter, frosting, melted ice cream, soft butter, etc.) get sticky very quickly.
There is Crisco that has a nice texture, and is edible, but not very tasty. I wonder if it could be mixed with powdered sugar and made to taste decent.
There are also massage oils (I use almond oil.) that are somewhat tasty and lubricate just fine, but don't have that splosy texture of lotions and such.
I am both very taste and texture oriented. Why isn't there a substance that can satisfy both?
Just throwing this out there to see if anyone has an idea on this.
I purchase products from a catalog-based company that specializes in sex / intimacy based products (marketed to married women, of course - ha!). Not sure if I'm allowed to name product names....but they have a couple of great tasting heavy-duty (good for your purposes) dual-use massage / lubricants. Strawberry is my favorite, and currently in my travel bag. 
-- Modified on 7/13/2011 9:56:20 AM
Wet And Messy play, is just that, with shaving cream, Vaseline, etc.
Have you thought of using flavored lube for your WAM play? i like the coconut myself. i wouldn't consume a big quantity in either your mouth nor asshole unless you want "the runs" though.
i had a "please insert eggs up your ass, lay them and cluck like a chicken" experience on web cam, great review and calls flooded in until i ran out of eggs. Since i had coated them in silicone generously, i found out from experience that silicone lube travels and covers very well. i was not leaving the bathroom facilities all afternoon. Not good, don't try this.
Sploshing, means the use of a food item. Have you tried cake batter that you mix yourself? or pancake batter? Those use flour, sugar, oil or crisco and you can even add chocolate to them. The sugar in things makes it sticky, so cut back on that. i'm getting that you like thicker textures, not as runny as oil by itself. Yogurt might appeal to you. Oil with a bit of fruit flavored syrup might appeal to you. Experiment.
Just don't mix savory (pasta & pasta sauce) with dessert because the end smell and look isn't good. Trust me.
Something to think about for the women into sploshing, don't get sugar in your vagina. You want to protect the flora and fauna of that precious hole.
I do plan to try out cake batter in the very near future. I will report back on that.
Alright. The egg thing. You just HAVE to share with me how you do that! Weren't you worried about that egg getting (gosh, I'm being graphic here!) lost or misplaced in a way?
Elisabeth
Have you thought of using flavored lube for your WAM play? i like the coconut myself. i wouldn't consume a big quantity in either your mouth nor asshole unless you want "the runs" though.
i had a "please insert eggs up your ass, lay them and cluck like a chicken" experience on web cam, great review and calls flooded in until i ran out of eggs. Since i had coated them in silicone generously, i found out from experience that silicone lube travels and covers very well. i was not leaving the bathroom facilities all afternoon. Not good, don't try this.
Sploshing, means the use of a food item. Have you tried cake batter that you mix yourself? or pancake batter? Those use flour, sugar, oil or crisco and you can even add chocolate to them. The sugar in things makes it sticky, so cut back on that. i'm getting that you like thicker textures, not as runny as oil by itself. Yogurt might appeal to you. Oil with a bit of fruit flavored syrup might appeal to you. Experiment.
Just don't mix savory (pasta & pasta sauce) with dessert because the end smell and look isn't good. Trust me.
Something to think about for the women into sploshing, don't get sugar in your vagina. You want to protect the flora and fauna of that precious hole.
If i were presenting a class on what is safe, i'd point to how my toys are made of silicone or glass (non-porous, best for everyday use, easy to clean). i'd point to how if a toy isn't those materials, i put a condom on it. i'd point to how my ass toys have a flange so they can't be sucked up the vacuum of my ass hole with nothing to grab onto. i have exchanged the balls on the string for a nifty toy by Fun Factory that is progressively bigger balls all poured connecting with a loop (that looks like a piggy tail) you can grab onto. i occasionally still use the balls on a string tied to a loop that hangs outside my body.
Obviously, in my naive slutty fog, i was worried because i slathered silicone lube on each brown egg, i knew which way the egg was strong (as opposed to how you crack it) and i wasn't putting the whole dozen up there at once. i did it one day, and because of the consequences of all that lube in my asshole, i never did it again.
i would today pass on the idea, because yes, i'd have no way of getting it out if i couldn't push it out. i do NOT recommend anyone do what i did.
AND that is exactly how, i look at an experience, i think about it, i investigate, research, and write essays posting on my site about "anal training", "sex toys, correct lube for them and how to clean them", etc.
Thank you for allowing me to make that clear.
~a
Just a thought.
In one of my more submissive moments (hours hahaha) I had an egg experience. But it was peeled HARD BOILED eggs and vegetable oil was used as lube. It was an amazing feeling, and over time multiple eggs were used simultaniously... followed by some very intense "clucking" ha ha ha
I'd let that happen again in a heart beat!!!!
Just for the sake of research (warning, these references may include images):
http://www.homosexinfo.org/Sexuality/RectalObjects
http://thelistcafe.com/top-10-bizarre-up-theirs-adventures
i guess what you put up there and how well you want know your local ER staff is up to you.
just sayin'
