I've been thinking a lot about the state of "this life" we seem to enjoy. It may just be me but it seems like things are going down hill fast. Over the last year some of the lady's I consider the best the business had to offer have retired. Typically when that happens, new blood steps in to fill the void and offers comparable or even better service. But then again, look at the NBA. Since Jordan, Bird and Magic left, the league and quality of play generally sucks. Anyway, here are a few of my suggestions.

For The Lady's

Website Advertisement - If you are going to market yourself as a premium escort, invest in a premium website. Invest in yourself for your image is all you have to go on in most cases and you never get a second chance at a first impression. If you are going to charge $$$$ per session yet your website is hosted on a free ISP, with 10,000 pop-up windows, or the type that shuts down after a certain number of hits per day, does not speak well of the lady. When I say invest in a good site, also does not mean you have to have every special effect in the book. Not all guys have high-speed internet access and there is nothing worse that to be sitting for minutes waiting for a page to load.

Less Is More -  It may be my own personal opinion, but when I'm looking to select a lady to share my time with, I want to be seduced. If I go to her site and I'm basically looking at a Hustler Magazine layout spread, then I'm probably not going to want to see her. Again it may be me but seeing a lady in sexy lingerie or a evening dress that seems to be painted on her, get my juices flowing. It leaves something for the imagination. I consider it a form of foreplay. Be flirtatious in your ad without being explicit.

Up To An Hour - If a guy pays for a certain amount of time, be willing to spend that time with him. I know guys who have paid to visit a lady for an hour and have been shown the door in 20 minutes. I once paid to see a lady for an extended visit (2 1/2 hours) and she was trying to show me the door after about 50 minutes. I was glad to leave but I also took some of my donation back. Lady's I know time is money but the same can be said for the guys. Some guys can only afford an hour at a time. Some guys only want an hour at a time. Some guys want all night sessions. The bottom line is if you are willing to see a guy for a certain amount of time, I feel you should make yourself available for the full time contracted. Now how you fill that time is between the two of you. One of my favs who retired last year, did not feel comfortable offering 1-hour sessions and went to two-hour minimums. Sure it pissed of some guys, but it was what she was comfortable providing and ultimately made for a better experience for both. Plus she did not feel she was being taken advantage of for wanting to set a certain mood.

Glamour Shots - This is a tough one, for again, your ad is that first impression you get with perspective clients, but if you are too made up, the guy may feel let down when he meets you and you don't look like you came out of the 1 hour make-up session. I would suggest taking pictures that would be reflective of how you would look i.e. make-up, hairstyle, etc. if a client were to meet you. Sort of gives a better expectation. I hate it when I hear a guy say, "She looked nothing like her pictures". On the same vain, don't use pics that are old. There is a certain lady who may be in her mid 40's and is using pics of her when she was in her 20's.

Body Art - I know I may be showing my age on this one, but what is the deal with the women now getting all these tattoos? I don't mind a simple sexy one, strategically placed. i.e. butterfly on the shoulder, rose on the thigh etc. What I don't like is to see a lady covered like she is working in the carnival sideshow. I'm not spending top dollar for that. In fact I may be wrong but many guys spending money in this hobby may not be willing to go on the dinner date, or night on the town, spending that kind of money and she has more tats than The One Man Gang (wrestler from the 80's. Man do I have to explain everything LOL). What kills me are the lady's who have their name on their arm or their chest. Like they forgot who they are? I can take the piercing but can someone PLEASE explain the gold tooth thing? Sorry but don't call yourself upscale or ask for top dollar from me and you have that going for you.

Run the Business Like A Business - Communication and customer satisfaction are the keys to any business in the service industry. If a lady has a phone contact number, she should have on her recording that if she does not get back to you after a certain period of time, she probably will not. I know lady's get tons of calls a day and if they spent all day responding to calls, they wouldn't get any work done. Same goes with e-mail. Don't have a auto responder telling me you are going to get right back to me and then I get a reply a week later. One quick tip lady's, if you want to score big ego points and get a repeat client, send him a thank you e-mail or note after the session. I guarantee the guy will be a regular. Customer service is the key.

For The Guy

Don't Haggle - Most lady's will indicate what their donation is. Nothing say's you are cheap quicker than trying to be Monty Hall and play let's make a deal. Don't try to talk her down off her rate. Don't ask for 30 minute sessions if she does not do them. Don't try to barter. (One lady told me a guy tried to offer her gift certificates to a super market in exchange for her services). If you haggle all you are doing is pissing her off and trust me, the lady's compare notes.

Be On Time - I know this goes both ways but I think its more a problem with the guys. If you think you may be late, call ahead. If you think you can't keep the appointment, call to cancel. If you don't, get use to having more lady's asking for deposits. If you book a session and don't show, that is income out of her pocket and time wasted where she probably could have booked another person for the time you were going to see her.

Hygiene - Wash your butt, brush your teeth, rinse your mouth out, use deodorant, use QUALITY cologne IN MODERATION, don't come in clothes that are dirty or smell of smoke. nuff said. Trust me, that is probably the biggest complaint I here lady's tell me about the guys. It blows my mind that a good would not want to be clean prior to seeing a lady but some guys feel why care about her if he is giving a donation. Wrong attitude! The more comfortable the lady is, the better chance you will have a good visit.

Listen To The Big Head - If you go to see a lady, and she is clearly not the person you want to see, (bait and switch), leave. Don't come here pissed and say you still went through with it because you were horny but it was a nightmare. A fool and his money are soon parted.

Be Realistic -  Don't fall in love. Regardless of how much these lady's may love their job, it is just that A JOB! Many have boy friends and yes husbands. Many guys are amazed at this fact. Don't get too caught up in the fantasy. You will hurt yourself in the end and she will end up with a stalker. Appreciate the lady and the moment and then get on with your life. If you and the lady click and it is mutually agrees that there is something more than a business relationship, then lovely. Trust me, it happens. But don't force it or wish it to happen if she does not want you to cross that boundary.

Well this is getting long and I could ad a few more but I'll leave it for now. Flame away if you must but its my two cents.


-- Modified on 7/4/2002 6:50:27 AM