You're right. It's an interesting problem. Usually I'll go along with "some" verification of who I am but have been asked for my full name on occasion. I won't give it out. It would be the height of silliness for a hobbyist to provide too much information just as it is for the providers.
Also, providers aren't the only ones who use an alias. I've never given my real name, phone or address and never will. So, what happens is that I see providers who either already know me or who are willing to see me without a lot of hassle.
Additionally, I can't imagine why a hobbyist would use a credit card. Can you imagine the difficulty you'd be in if a provider took exception to you in some way? No thanks, I'll take my chances with cash, cell phones, aliases and the women who don't make me jump through hoops.
Isn't in high time that TER come up with a review system for us guys so we don't have to go thought this references dance every time we want to see someone new.
I have seen a number of the more well know providers so I can get the references but I am an impulsive hobbyist who every now and then gets a wild hair.
Sometimes the referrals just don't check their email or don't answer their phone. Which is not doing anything wrong by any means just slows down the whole process.
I sure TER can come up with some type of system for the VIP members to have providers post a review/referrals on us guys too.
Well that is my rant/suggestion for the month anyone else want to chime in.
Now I don't post very often but I have been on the board for a number of years. So what I am
Didn't mean to post before proofreading
The dance gets ridiculous at times. I for one don't want to expend so much energy to see someone due to lack of time
I am also impulsive!
There are services that do this for a fee, but I suspect they charge providers as well, because I don't see too many providers who say on their web site that they will use this or that system. I think it would be a great service to VIP members if TER and a bunch of providers could design a system that almost everyone would agree works. I wonder what the legal ramifications would be? On the other hand, for privacy nuts like me, a system acceptable to almost all providers might be too stringent. So I hope some providers would still accept the good old reference system, slow as it can be.
References are THE ONLY way to go for me.
If throughout your history you havent answers to any of the questions I ask........................
It's references or NOTHING !
I have made friends with lotsa lovely ladies that way and most of my complaints from hobbyists sound like this " I think she will get mad at me if I ask for a reference "
That is the way some providers are true but, then you need to pick a better provider. One that is willing to realize that I dont nor do they "own" anyone in this Biz.
I give references all the time, many of my guys travel and the others just like variety. If you know me then have NO FEAR of asking me to give a reference and it can usually be done very quickly. Ladies I am available for your inquiries at any time also.
tyvm, P.T.
I try to make it a point to let any gentleman friend know I have no problem giving a reference to anyone for them... provided I know it is the genleman who is requesting the info released. There are few times when a gentleman, new to the hobby, requests an appointment. I believe this is when the entire distaste comes into play in the guys mind. I always apologize in advance if my screening is un-nerving but I think I make up for it with the security of knowing I will keep anything I learn totally private. Bottom line,with me is... if I do not know your previous provider &/or I can not speak directly to her then a gentleman just has to understand he must give me enough information to verify who he is. I would think any gentleman would appreciate the extra efforts that some providers use to stay safe. kisses Candace
There are some ladies that are truely the professional in the hobby. I find it comforting when a provider does do the screening process and wants to know alittle about me. I don't think that a lady should have to apoligize for her screening process at all. She needs to be safe and feel comfortable with whom she is potentially going to spend time with. Heck, so do we. We check them out. This is a business and I know when people request credit or see a dentist or something they always ask questions about thier new client. I have never been given and apology for the basic info. Heck, when you apply for instant credit at a retail store you give all of your personal info like (ie) job info, income info, Social security number and home number and stuff like that to a total stranger. Now, think about that one. Let the lady do her stuff. You will have a better time....
Must my thoughts...........
MonsterJazz
You're right. It's an interesting problem. Usually I'll go along with "some" verification of who I am but have been asked for my full name on occasion. I won't give it out. It would be the height of silliness for a hobbyist to provide too much information just as it is for the providers.
Also, providers aren't the only ones who use an alias. I've never given my real name, phone or address and never will. So, what happens is that I see providers who either already know me or who are willing to see me without a lot of hassle.
Additionally, I can't imagine why a hobbyist would use a credit card. Can you imagine the difficulty you'd be in if a provider took exception to you in some way? No thanks, I'll take my chances with cash, cell phones, aliases and the women who don't make me jump through hoops.
Gentlemen- at the risk of really sounding way too logical to be a female, are you trying to imply that L/E or any psycho crazy killer could not join TER and write some bogus reviews of providers that he saw? Yeah ok we are all about not doing any more of a reference check than that. Better idea- if you can't provide enough info to make a provider feel comfortable then stick to providers that don't require such. Like street walkers, AMP etc.... you might, however be hard pressed at keeping a ATF or repeated experience as these are frequently busted by L/E, or just shut down or possibly even worse they just disapear one night at the hands of a client. When will "JOHNS" ever get it through their head: My life has just as much,or more at stake than his precious wife learning of his behavior. If you are dealing with a known provider what do you have to hide annyway? Get over the paranoid belief that you are so important that every working girl is out to scam you. Stick with reputable providers and play safe.
Point taken. I have no one to find out about my actives. So in my case that is not the point although I realize that most of the "Johns" do have something to hide. My post was less of a complaint and more of just an observation.
Don't you think that it should be sufficient for a client to say "look at a list of providers whom I have seen"? From that list, they can gather all the info that they need for a reference. The provider can see how he rates certain providers whom they know, and get some idea about his likes and dislikes!!
Also, while I'm on the subject of reviews and the info that TER wants in the review, there are many cases where a provider has been in the bizz for 2,3, or more years and the fee is never changed(TER's fault). The review may state that she gets $200. for an hour, when she is expecting $300.I have asked TER to change this in their new beta version of the next review format.
Nobody is saying one party has more to lose than the other. Seems to me the system works fine. If I think the provider wants too much information I'm not going to enlist her services. If she thinks I don't give enough verifyable information, she won't provide me with services. Everyone goes home happy. The system seems to regulate itself pretty well.
And...yes, there are providers who might cause trouble and I do want to protect myself from a provider who might cause a problem with, as you put it, "my precious wife". Last year I was virtually stalked by a provider. Thankfully, she only had an alias and a cell phone number. It's my choice, just as it is the provider's choice. Each decides how much or how little verification is necessary for that particular encounter.
Oh, by the way, I never have and never will see street walkers. There are many, many, fine, beautiful providers who are cautious but not invasive with their verification needs.
Let's say the Code Word is "coming out of the closet"! LOL! I would send client's to Sofia and give the code word to the gentleman. He's been screened and ready to go have fun! He tells Sofia the Code Word.... She knew he was safe. The key is to change the Code Word often. The system worked for us and with less hassle!
Be Safe
xoxo
Keri
Yes, and, having enjoyed using your Code Word system, I can say it worked quite well. Thank you for having such a system in place.
That's the type of referral system that I would think would help the ladies feel more comfortable with accepting referrals.
I have been using codes for years. That is the answer to the question that I ask of callers. I have, and know many of them from others too.
Codes DO work but alotta hobbyists forget what they are if they are only an infrequent visitor. So then I torture them with a zillion questions. Some get their feathers ruffeled some just laff and say oh yeah Phone Terrorist hehehehe.
For me I keep ya all on the phone sooooooooooo long annoyin ya till I FEEL your personality. Then I LISTEN to everything. Background noises and to the texture in the voice on the other end.
Refferals do work if you first call your provider and refresh her memory. If she can not remember you well then I am sorry but, no sleekride for you.
tyvm, P.T.
I agree, clever idea, you two. That's what I love about the south!!
How about this....you visit with a provider and all goes well. So to give you a permanent refernce she shaves your head and tatoos the word on your scalp. Once the hair grows back in noone else can see the code word.
Now whenever you get the urge you go to a provider and she shaves your head. If the word is there you get serviced.
You'll be able to tell all the pervs 'cos we'll all be bald and smiling.
Classic, simply classic! Very nice, buckhead_guy!
on the St. Peter itself. This even if you have to shave, nobody will ever see.
As an added benefit, instead providers saying "get comfortabele" they can simply say "Let me check your reference"
How about that?
When you described this, it reminded me of what they sometimes call digital signatures. A computer geek who knows how to use what is called public key cryptography (which is used all the time on the internet) could set up a system that would allow providers to give referrals to other providers almost exactly this way, but without having to know the code word in advance. In the next paragraph I will try to explain how it would work. Don't try to read that paragraph if you aren't a geek at heart. And if there is a real computer geek reading, maybe you can explain it better. Or maybe you can set the system up and sell it!
Provider 1 could send a client two files. One is the reference. The other is the reference coded up in a public key code. The client gives these to Provider 2, saying they came from provider 1. Provider 2 would know Provider 1's public key and use it to decode the coded reference. If the two references say the same thing, then it turns out (by the magic of public key cryptography) that only Provider 1 could have written it.