No, you are not crazy. You are jealous and envious of the other working girls that your client is seeing.

What is wrong with "how he went about it"? He passed your screening. He paid your donation. He gives you a heads up that he is using you as a reference with other girls. What more do you want or expect?

I don't think that her problem is her inability to understand that variety is the spice of life.  She seems to recognize that, per her statement about openly giving references.  I think her issue is the fact that the gent seems to have contacted her using the guise of scheduling an appointment, when in fact, he really just wanted to use her as a reference.

I think there are a few men out there who believe that if they don't "butter us up" by making us believe that they are planning to schedule with us as well that we will not be willing to provide a reference.  I realize this might be spearheaded by a few ladies acting unprofessionally, but for the rest of us, it's a pain the ass.  When you ask a lady for her time, she may clear that spot on the schedule, and then when she recieves a reference request from someone else and you have not followed through with her, it's frustrating.  Most of us understand that variety is what this hobby is all about.  I think many ladies can understand the irritation Heather is feeling.  Probably this fellow was worried that she may not want to provide a reference if he didn't make her believe that he was planning on seeing her again right away.  In most cases, this isn't true.  It may just be due to a bit of ignorance or self importance on his part, or he may have been scorned by a jealous and unprofessional provider who denied him the simple courtesy of providing a reference so he could see another lady of his choosing.

Either way, it's still a bit tactless to approach it that way.  Everyone's time is valuable.

I have given several references for one particular gent...

...and every time, he comes back to see me too He even took ME out on HIS birthday (sweet guy). I guess what my point is: you get what you give.

Xoxo
Caylee

He should not have made it seem as if he was going to make an appointment with you. He should have simply asked if you would give him references. Whatever his reasons his actions were deceitful.

No regular session or anything? If so, it was a bit tacky and showed that he had little regard for your time. The one time I've requested a reference was done via email. Never would do what this guy  did.

I am reference friendly and I know there have been some men who chose me in part because I am.  I feel that providing references are part of the "after service", so to speak.  They were kind enough to pick me, screen with me, show up on time and behave like a gent.  It's a smart move on their part to patronize someone who is available and responsive for that purpose.  I do limit the references to a year and there have been once or twice when I've sent a note, "hey, maybe you can use one of those girls I gave references to...  it's been a year and I have given so many providers the thumbs up on you there should be someone else you've seen recently who can take that over "  - and it's always been taken well.

Men pick providers and exclude providers for any number of reasons.  It's great that you have that in your favor - why not enjoy the benefits and roll with the minor annoyances it may bring.  It's to the benefit of the entire hobby IMO, Pro's and clients.

Referencing guys you have not spent time with will result in hurting your business reputation.

In my line of work, I only refer patients to other providers I would feel comfortable treating me. Those providers refer back to me under the same conditions.

I know that's a bit different than this situation but it still applies.  If the guy is a jerk, but you don't know that, why risk harming your relationship with the other ladies? Even though you are technically competitors, we know there's enough business to go around. There must be a sense of camaraderie, right?

It can happen that he booked an appointment with you and after that he found some new girls that he felt he must try them out at once or else he will become too old for them (pun intended). You know, genuine change of mind. However, that does not absolve him from his actions. I believe that he should be man enough to apologize to you and offer to come back to fulfill his commitment.

I dont see where he was wrong......

at all if he didnt have an appointment BOOKED. The guy is asking (according to your OP) when you are around then wants to use you as a reference? WOW!! he even said he wants to see you again but I am sure he probably wont now. I know you said you wouldnt see him again BUT I have given literally thousands of references and believe me the guys DO come back again and again. I think you are reading into this to much. Its not like he had an appointment booked and then ask for a reference. Just my opinion. I would hate to see you loose money on someone that would have more than likely been back.
Hugs and kisses
TL