I ventured into this without that level of caution, so I've never hesitated to give whatever info they ask (within reason) if I am asking for them to spend time with me. They're putting a lot of trust into the encounter, in welcoming you without ever having even seen what you look like or knowing much about you at all other than the info you give them. If I feel I have made a good selection of who I really want to see, then I feel I can give them an equal amount of trust with my info. There is indeed the element of the quality of ladies you're considering seeing too, so as the previous responses have expressed, the BSC factor does figure into it.
They're screening for their comfort in seeing you. I would worry more if they didn't screen at all. We all have to use our Spidey Senses, and if you're feeling red flags waving, then move on to someone or something else. ~Be excellent to each other~ OCHow do the males feel about giving your real name in screening? Does it seem necessary to you?
How do providers feel about getting the real name/employment information from suitors? Are more providers and screeners asking for and demanding it?
I may be in the minority but I have absolutely NO problem giving my real name. I only see professional and well reviewed providers and Ive yet to run into a problem. I understand the concern especially if you have a family and a lot to lose but I think we forget they do too. Its so much talent in the Atl so if someone doesn't meet your screening requirements then you can easily move on. Just my 2 cents.
I just read that in China students can apply for a student loan by submitting a nude picture of themselves holding their student ID. The picture will be released to the internet should the student default on their loan.
Sooo, be happy it is only your name these girls are asking for. Things could be much worse.
I have revealed my real name to all of the providers that I have seen who have asked for it - which is nearly all of them. It is not something I would prefer to do - however, I have come to peace with it. My opinion is that the primary risk is "Bat Shit Crazy".
However, I will say that it makes me VERY cautious about who I see - and I therefore strongly prefer to see providers who know (and work with) providers that I already know. I also stick with older providers who seem to have a lot to lose.
My preferred method of introduction to a provider is a double or a group event where I can make my own judgement about BSC. Even that isn't fool proof - so you have to try to figure it out from TER posts and reviews .... which ain't great but it's all I have got.
PS - my opinion is that girls who only have 10/10 reviews and from their pictures are not 22 year old super models -- good indicator of BSC... for obvious reasons
I ventured into this without that level of caution, so I've never hesitated to give whatever info they ask (within reason) if I am asking for them to spend time with me. They're putting a lot of trust into the encounter, in welcoming you without ever having even seen what you look like or knowing much about you at all other than the info you give them. If I feel I have made a good selection of who I really want to see, then I feel I can give them an equal amount of trust with my info. There is indeed the element of the quality of ladies you're considering seeing too, so as the previous responses have expressed, the BSC factor does figure into it.
They're screening for their comfort in seeing you. I would worry more if they didn't screen at all. We all have to use our Spidey Senses, and if you're feeling red flags waving, then move on to someone or something else.
~Be excellent to each other~
OC
You know, this comes up every 6 months, over and over again. Since no one else in this thread is pointing out the obvious . . . it's a terrible idea. First you have to weigh how much you have to lose. If you live alone and plan to die alone, and have no professional repercussions, fuck it just be you . . . In fact you should post on this board with your real name. However, if you have any need for discretion, or an absolute need for discretion, then you must guard your name even more than you guard your money.
And contrary to popular belief, there are professional ladies out here who are mentally stable, and they are probably THE most dangerous women to give your name to. Why? Because they are organized. See you risk a disorganized lady losing or not protecting your info, and the crazy ones may be an outing risk; but the organized ones keep your shit forever and ever, with notes on you, waiting for the day when they accidentally reveal the info. My favorite mistake is now twice I have been emailed by two separate professional ladies that didn't realize they were blasting to their entire mailing list and that all their clients could see the other clients' emails. Of course some of these poor guys email from their work emails, probably for verification, and then the whole world knows . . . Forever.
I know for a fact my boss (a woman who despises men who cheat on their wives) would run me out of my office, and then gossip to all the people she knows about me. And I work in a very specific community, I would literally be burned from Mexico to Canada and some parts of Asia.
A name may seem like a simple and reasonable thing to ask for, but for some of us . . . it is beyond asking. You just have to know which person you are? If you have something to lose by being outed, then it's not even a consideration.
I find that P411 helps. If a lady accepts a verification service, then problem solved. Some accept the whitelist. Other girls I see as agency in Canada, and they take no truly personal information at all, just whatever first name you give them. There are plenty of ways to work out an appointment with out giving away personal information, and once you figure out those ways, you can just work around the need to give out your name.
I've also received the occasional email blast with other men's email in plain view. And that is the low end of the risk. It's a bad idea and not worth the risk.
Sometimes I feel comfortable giving out any info. Hell I even get outcalls to my home with some. The easiest way I find to skip all this is to go to the M&Gs and get introduced by another trust worthy provider. If I find a lady I'm particularly interested in. I get Ginger of an agency owner who knows me to introduce and vouch for me I usually get very few questions after that except "When do you want to get together?" I don't have a huge hobby budget so I often meet enough ladies to carry me thru the next M&G
.....to those of you who are understanding and accepting of the fact that screening is as much for your safety as ours. For those of you who are not interested in the point that if she does not know who you are, she didn't know who the last was either.....oh well, c'est la vie. Just do me a favor and save me the manipulative phone call.
Suzee
Every person has two sides. What they say they'll do....and what they actually do.
Some say they screen hard as hell with real info necessary, yet drop that if they see you at a M&G or know someone who says you're 'cool'. Some say they'll NEVER give real info....yet fold like a cheap suit if the lady they want to see requires it.
Ultimately it comes down to, no matter how important you think you are, the lady has to have a certain level of comfort in knowing who she will spend time with. If she asks more than you want to give...move on. If she asks little, then know she requires that of others as well.
Personally I don't give a rat's ass because I'm single, don't give a crap who knows who I am, and am untouchable.
So my level of 'risk' is lower. LOL
Your question asks for honesty in a world where that is as rare as a unicorn that shoots rainbows out of it's butt.
Good luck with that.
Just sayin'
DD
Just too risky. I would never ask a provider for her real name either.