My ATF just went indie.  She emailed me to let me know and asked me to see her.  The email didn't say anything about rates.  On her website, her rates are listed as substantially higher than when she was with the agency.

Now, I would still see her at the higher rates, just not as often.  We've never talked rates, I always tipped her, and I honestly think we're pretty good friends.  Is there a discrete way I can ask her whether her new rates apply to me?  I don't want to insult her or appear cheap, but I honestly would need to cut back on our visits if I had to pay the higher Estes, even if I cut out the tips.

Ladies - How did you handle this when you went indie?

ask her directly so its clear cut or
you could pay her what you always have and have her address it with you.
after all its a business I am told and when it comes to money there is no insults just misunderstandings.

at the end of the day, she will always...

Count de Monet
ps please provide her link  lol lol lol

Dear Betty Boom Boom,

Thanks for letting me know about your change to Indy.  I'm sure you'll do well, especially based on all the wonderful times we've had together.  I'd love to continue our friendship and frequent encounters.  But frankly, the rates we've always had are pretty close to my personal limits.  I'm assuming that this will still be ok for us.  Please let me know if that's not the case.

Cheers and looking forward to our next wild time together.

Yours truly....

In my experience they always have answered favorably ...
GG

Just be honest with her even if it appears to make you look cheap. I've told numerous ladies i would love to see them but couldn't afford their rates we even joked about it. Hell theirs a 600 an HR provider i would love to see but i can't afford her rates. Do you think i care if it makes me look cheap?

Just be honest with her My 1.25 Cents

The direct approach works best for me.  Just ask.  I started out independent, and I upped my rate one time.  When I did so, I honored the previous rate to anyone I was already seeing that I wanted to continue seeing.  

I can assure you that taking the advise of just showing up and paying what you always did won't get the most favorable response.  Yes, it's business, but the new donation is up and posted.  Playing ignorant isn't admired or rewarded.  

You'll find out quickly if your business and companionship was/is valued or not.  If someone sees me regularly three times a month and I enjoy their company you can bet they'll earn some freq flyer/medallion perks.  

Just the way I see things. =)

There doesn't really seem to be a right way to handle this and I wish the Providers would/could do more to provide clarity because each case seems to be unique and different.

For me personally, I don't like to have to ask because I've learned that most Providers want to avoid the subject and if you do ask, most will say you are grandfathered in, but then you find yourself feeling like you are getting less or it becomes harder to schedule, etc, but I'm sure the ladies would usually prefer to fill availability at the new higher rate - that's why they became Independent.  One particular lady I used to see quite frequently that "grandfathered" me in stopped returning emails/calls simply because she wanted to avoid confrontation and was too immature to tell me if I wanted to continue seeing her, it would have to be at the new rate.

So, for me, if I really want to see a lady that has raised her donation rate, I will start paying the higher price. Guys, acting like you don't know of the price increase is crass, low class and will certainly put you on the wrong side of the lady.

However, if a lady I'm seeing has been charging, for example $250-$275, and jacks her rate up 40%-60% to the $400+ range, I won't even inquire about grandfathering, nor will I ever see her again.  Using the earlier analogy, if I'm buying a particular commodity at Macy's, and Macy's discontinues the commodity, but Neiman Marcus picks up that line, what kind of fool is going to walk to the other end of the mall and pay 60% more for the same item?  It is exactly the same pussy... I mean item!  

Especially to Meagan, CC and CK.  All were very helpful and greatly appreciative.

This is a very low volume provider who always gave me 100%, so I think I'll follow Honey Badgers approach, and just put the new rate in the envelope and see what she says.  My prediction is she'll accept the higher amount, but give me an extra half hour or something like that.  Well see.  Thanks again to all.

well heck I turn 60 on Sunday, I am old enough to be all of these youngs ladies grandfather!! LOL!!!

that the women we do not hesitate to ask to do the most depraved things with, to and for us sexually; seem to hold the cards when it comes to rates and we shrink into being small boys when money is concerned. I have done it as well, so by no means am I mocking you.  I have, in the past, had no hesitation in asking a lady that I have a relationship (business) with if I am grandfathered (no pun intended) in at the rate that we had established.  I have also made sure that I have the ability to make the appointment anyway, even if the answer is "no".