Who had in the past outed a client to his family purposely to harm him, would you want to know?
Had I known I wouldn't have seen her. If/when I found out I would stop seeing her.
That would be a little bit late to protect yourself by disengaging unfortunately
True, but may keep me from establishing a longer relationship with the provider. Or I may decide the guy is crazy and keep seeing the provider
Here is that if I reviewed a provider that another guy has had an serious issue with, like outing publicly, then I would want that guy to message me privately to inform me of the danger. Not all guys would want to know that information because it could have been an isolated instance and have nothing to do with the providers normal operations.
I do not believe it should be posted in a public forum, because that hurts everyone involved, however I personally would like to have the information so I could decide how I wanted to proceed.
I'm just curious if I'm the only one that feels that way
i was outed (again) not long ago and you're fucking A right I named the bitch/es who did it.
Any woman/man who has outed another TER member needs to be named and named PUBLICLY so the rest of us can give that person a wide berth. This goes for providers outing clients, clients outing providers and clients/providers outing each other. No TER rule is more sacrosanct than revealing the personal information of others.
I say NAME THE BITCH!!! (and if a guy does it, my advice is exactly the same)
Fight Club Rules--RULE!
W
Because it is a gray area as to whether I was a jilted lover or an outed client.... I viewed our relationship as a girlfriend..... she played that role so well that I did not know she was acting until it was too late..... I'm past it and I don't want her to suffer. Oddly enough I still love and care about her.... or at least the person she presented me with.... I really have no idea what the real person is like
That sounds good kid
Moving on will be the toughest thing you've ever done but it is the right move for the future
Of course everyone needs to know
The guy could have more to lose if the provider decided to go further, so fear of further retribution
The providers warn each other about this type of behavior....
But that exact scenario played out here a few years ago and did in fact ruin the guys marriage, family, and business (which she was also nice enough to spill the beans at)
It was pretty well known on the board - the guy of course disappeared, and she sort of comes and goes
Play safe
That is the exact situation I would hope to avoid.... I'm not going anywhere with it..... it just crossed my mind this morning. I know there is no way that every session ends as nicely as the reviews state and I wondered if people sat on information or shared it when it seemed appropriate
Seduction.... the question really is IF you reviewed a provider as an ATF, and I knew she had outed me to my family, would you want me to message you with the details.
This did not happen, it is hypothetical
If she had outed you, you should have gotten her kicked off the board so she could NEVER reap the benefits that come with being a "well reviewed TER provider"
and for the record this is NOT hypothetical in my case. A BSC hooker (actually a couple of them) recently outed me and splashed all my personal info across Twitter. Guess what? That BSC hooker is no longer getting reviews because she got her ass thrown off of TER.
If she had already outed you to your family, you would no longer have anything to fear from her, so if you were too chickenshit to name her publicly, that's on you. Hypothetically of course. lol
Yep
This is really not complicated
So I dated her for a year and a half. In the last 6 months things got weird, she was distant when we talked or were together. I thought she was seeing someone else..... I then discovered she was seeing a lot of someone else's as a provider. I confronted her about it and her response was to facebook message my wife (my wife knew about her as we were going through a divorce) and message friends and family that were online to let them know that I had been dating her. Over the time that we dated I helped her with money several times, well into 6 figures.
Does that constitute a provider outing me..... or am I just being a broken hearted, fool
It sounds familiar to the previous behavior of the lady I mentioned above and without a fucking doubt we all need to know who this is BEFORE meeting her (though if this is who it sounds like I already have zero interest)
How was it an outing?
That said, quite a few of us here would say ‘been there done that’ and truly feel your pain! Welcome to the jilted lovers club 
You got good advice here. But it is very difficult to follow that advice ... but you must! And, you will ... just a matter of time.
Also, a bit off the topic, you dropped 150 K tax free per year on her. That’s s great salary! Is it possible that that made her motivated to become a provider (if she were not in the first place as you thought) ? Just curious for your thoughts bc you only know the case.
The outing came in facebook messages to my family..... imagine spending 2 years and 300k on a woman you want to spend the rest of your life with, telling each other you love them each night and again in the morning.... then one day you run across 6 months of reviews. Her response to that is messaging your family to tell them you are having an affair. I would classify that as an "outing"..... others have said I was a jilted lover, I'm gonna go with that and let it be.
As for turning her into a provider, after some research in the immediate aftermath I discovered that I was just a break between times as a provider. I could say more but I'm not going to get close to outing her, oddly enough I still care about her and wish her the best
First time posting. (Long time reader) Lol, guess this will be a helluva way to say hello to the community, but I'm calling bull on this.
1) She became distant so you called one of her old numbers? Everyone whose ever had a cell phone knows numbers are recycled quickly by carriers. I got a new number a few months ago and was getting text from someone who had been texting with the previous owner the week before. A woman picked up? There was a 50% chance of that.
2) You haven't booked an appointment with her yet so you don't actually 100% know it's her. We all want to think we're unique but there's quite a few ladies on this board that if you showed my Mom their picture (face blurred or cropped) she'd swear it's me.
3) If your divorced why would she reach out to your wife, family and friends and why would it matter?
Maybe it's me, but you seem like a dangerous client and I'll tell you why I think that;
1) You came on here looking to out her, to ruin her business when it sounds like you don't even know 100% that it's her (you said she lied about it, you haven't booked an appointment with her so you don't know for sure) and you chanced possibly ruining another ladies business who you've assumed is her. If it was her, and you outed her, and you claimed to love her so much, you were making sure to hurt her ability to live, meanwhile you were married while you were seeing her so you wanted your cake and to eat it too.
You say you were heartbroken yet you've got 7 reviews up. Sounds like real heartbreak to me.
BTW, Hi Atlanta, guess this was a great way to pop my TER cherry.
Sabine
(web site under construction, soon to post ad)
1. She picked up, we talked, she told me she was escorting. So she admitted to escorting while we were dating. I am not assuming anything.
2. I had never been on this site until I googled her number and I found this site. So I would not have booked her or reviewed her here.
3. My divorce was not finalized when this occurred. She messaged mostly my ex family. Which embarrassed my ex and pissed her off.
So if you think I'm dangerous don't worry I won't book with you. There are plenty of gentlemen for you to see here other than me and plenty of ladies for me.
Welcome to Atlanta
That is not what your other post have said.
You called. You hung up. You googled her number. You discovered her reviews. That she has not admitted to it. That she lied. Your wife already knew about her. That differs greatly from what your saying now. 2+2 isn't equaling 4.
Doesn't matter to me one way or another, but anyone who had to ask a group of strangers if they should out her, does matter too me, when you yourself have culpability in the situation and you weren't seeing her as a provider.
Thank you. I'm from Atlanta. Only new to posting here. I'm what is typically considered an UTR.
Interesting thoughts.
I personally don’t have the time to go back and check this all out in depth but I am wondering what axe you have to grind with the kid
No axe to grind, just voicing my view on an issue that I believe is not only bull but dangerous.
I'm a numbers gal, hard wired to break things down from the base.
1) They were having an affair 1 1/2-2 years. Typical relationships, especially affairs, have a typical shelf life of a year or 2 without evolving. He's married, she gets distant, his first thought is there is someone else, not that there is something wrong with the foundation or that he's done something.
2) People in general, look up people's current phone number. In his first statement on it, he said he got suspicious so he called an old number? No one does that. He then stated when he confronted her, she didn't admit to it and got radio silence, then he was outed. Now he states, she picked up. She admitted to it. They talked about it.
3) His wife knew about it. They were in the middle of a divorce. He states he's 64 and has spent 300G on this woman that his wife, he's divorcing, knows about. 300G in 2 years? That's some deep pockets. That means there is some serious cash in the marriage. Now he's stating his wife was pissed because the woman told family. Do you know one wife, whose found out her husband is fucking someone else, that doesn't blast that shit to anyone who will listen? Especially with that kind of cash involved? She's going to want to make sure everyone knows because she's going to want to take his ass to the cleaners. Knowing who the other woman is? That's pure gold to her.
4) He comes here, wanting to out her, his lover, not just here but to her family, but he hasn't yet verified with 100% certainty that it's her. He's going on suspicions and guesses. That's some dangerous bullshit. What if it's not her? He ruins a providers livilhood whose paid her dues and has reviews? Once that kind of rumor gets out there, there's little recovery. Yes, he alleges she outed him as an affair, and that sucks, but it's a helluva lot easier to recover from being accused, as a man, of an affair than be outed as a hooker to family or lose your livelihood.
Get what I'm saying? That's a threat to the community.
Sabine
Lol, I didn't pick him on purpose, this thread was the only one with real depth and it stunk like BS.
Too bad we have no emoji here for a standing ovation.... You are a very astute
woman......encore, please....I believe you have exposed the outer
I will answer each and every point here if that's what you desire.... while I type that up, where did I say I was 64 years old.... I think you are getting some stories mixed up
I will take the time to answer it all though.
Consider the following that you have glossed over and completely missed:
1. He did not start the OP to out her; he asked for our opinion about it - these two are not the same. Actually it shows he is a more considerate guy than others.
2. Like anyone else he does NOT need anybody's permission to out (right or wrong) anybody! He could just do it any way as long as TER is okay. He could do it without TER if the other johns are interested! In this context, point 1 above is more sticking!
I know, from time to time, we all get carried away with passionate arguments and just get busy proving 'our' side ... but before calling someone dangerous to the community, a dangerous client - we need to look at the complete picture!
Gentleguy
Very good counterpoints gentle
Apparently this “new” poster realizes she had fucked up and probably due to your well structured outline
Thanks for the support guys
I'm letting the situation go, moving on, not picking at the scab.... I appreciate your doing the same.
In hindsight it was a mistake to post here, because it is impossible to tell the whole story and I can only tell one side. Every relationship has 3 stories, his, hers and the truth, which is usually somewhere in the middle. So the best thing for me is to move forward and not look back.
I do however value the advice given to me by many people here, even GAG who I didn't like the delivery but may be exactly what I needed to hear.
I believe that you have it right as does SMH below....I have been watching this train wreck in amusement from the opening suspect "what if" post..... Is it every gonna die the death it deserves?
I love people who speak their minds. I look forward to seeing more of you.
BTW, I have a reputation for "speaking my mind" too, or at least that's what I think they mean when people say "GaGambler is a fucking asshole" lol
AAR, welcome to our little corner of the internet.
If you were seeing that provider would you want to know that history
She didn't out a client, she outed an ex boyfriend, and I am sure there are two sides to the story.
My very serious advice to you is to "get up, dust yourself off and GET THE FUCK OVER HER"
We get it, she fucked you over, but anyone who meets her here, ALREADY knows she's a hooker. We don't need, nor want to hear from any of her jilted lovers.
I'd have to agree with you on your advice
To Valdosta: it's very tough to do but you'll feel better if you move on - Is it possible you're transferring your bitterness about your marriage all into this other woman who also Fu ked you up?
Anything is possible at this point, when I totaled it up I had dropped just under 300k in roughly 2 years, she was hitting me up for more money and I thought something was fishy.... complete dumbass for not thinking something was fishy before, but pussy will do that to you.
I have decided to not pursue it further however it came to mind that if someone else had the history I had with a provider I was seeing, would I want to know?.... for me the answer was yes I would want to know. I was just curious how others felt.
I feel your pain
Not to the tune of 300k but I do feel your pain
Fortunately with the market roaring I can make it up quickly
Was thinking the same
What would you do with the numerous PM's from other hobbyist for the providers name?
but honestly dude, you need to get over this girl and what she did to you. It's simply not healthy to still be trying to punish her for what was in a good part your own damn fault.
I have a further suggestion, spend the next $300,000 fucking a THOUSAND different hookers. You will then be the one with the smile on your face, and you can even review them all so she can see what she's missing. You know what they say about "the best revenge" it's "living well" now go out and fuck everything that moves and quit obsessing over one woman who did you wrong.
I recognize my fault in this.... and I am not trying to punish her, if I were going to do that I would return the favor of introducing her provider life to her friends and family, which I won't do, even though that is what she did to me. If I followed your advice from earlier I would out her on the boards, which I also will not do.
What I am doing is putting her out of my mind and living well. I just got curious this morning and asked a question
Your dynamic with her was not a "Hooker/John" relationship, which are the only ones that really count around here where it comes to "warning the community"
You are hardly "putting her out of your mind" You can lie to yourself all you want, but when you try to get us to believe your lie, I am going to call BULLSHIT on you every time you do it. for your own fucking good I might add.
You are trying to warn guys about seeing your ex girlfriend, and by doing so ruining her business. How is that not "trying to punish her"??? The last person I want giving me infomation about a provider is her jilted ex boyfriend.
I have not warned the FIRST guy about her.... I merely asked a question, so don't get off telling me what I'm trying to do
and your OP is if not an outright lie, it's at least VERY misleading.
Your ex was not a hooker who outed a client she outed (if we are to believe you at all) her ex Boyfriend. None of that is relevant to anyone who doesn't plan on dating her, and I doubt seriously than anyone here has any intentions of picking up where you left off.
You weren't just "merely asking a question" you were obsessing about how to get back at your ex.
Lol.... you crack me up that you know everything.... I really cannot decide whether you even believe half the shit you say. It is entertaining though. Have a good day
by what you say here.
and I did just notice your post from yesterday at the very bottom of the thread where you concede that as a "jilted lover" sharing her info with others serves no good purpose. At least you seem to be "kind of" getting it. I honestly did not read that post before making my earlier comments. It doesn't take away from my statements about your "original intentions" when making your OP, but it does make my last couple of posts moot as there is no reason to re-litigate something you already conceded to yesterday.
Based on several guys opinion that I was more of a jilted lover that I really should not warn guys about this provider. I have answered all requests with a similar message. I will not be sharing her name
GAG got me to thinking, I don't want to ruin her life or her business..... what I want and will probably never get so I have to just suck it up and move on is, an apology..... if I got a hey I don't want to get back together with you however I know I lied, cheated, and hurt you. It was wrong of me and I'm sorry.
Then it would be easier to move on, but in today's world people don't take responsibility for their actions and words unless you force them too, I'm not going to force it because it would hurt too many innocents..... but a recognition and apology would go a long way
Or maybe it was The Donald
You don't always get what you want...
You know the rest.
She is not going to apologize because in her mind you had it coming. Right or wrong your fault her fault nobody's fault.
You should have stuck with hookers.
Who is she?
I'd like to give her a roll to see what her skills were that fucked your head so bad.
It wasn't pussy skills that fucked me up.... it was heart skills
And as I have stated before I'm not telling who she is
Your story is not unique. Over the years I've known hookers that had an unknowing hubby at home that has no clue what she is doing for extra egg money. Heck a couple of them were married to cops. Hope that isn't you.
I know you are trying to heal or get some understanding but there is none here. Count your blessings she cut you loose before hurting you more.
Nope, I'm not a cop... but that is funny as shit to think of a provider married to a cop
Couldn’t say it any better!
Also, an apology is pointless... even if one came.
Nope.
An apology like what you described wouldn't make it any better.
You'd move from there to needing to understand why.
No. No. No.
You are probably right..... there is just no making sense of the senseless
She needed/wanted money, you provided it to her.
She got paid, you got played.
You should just be thankful that she didn't drain you completely, or worse married you, got a big life insurance on your dumb ass, and then fed you rat poison until she got her REAL payday.
As the victim this is NEVER going to make any sense to you, but as someone on the outside looking in, this makes perfect sense to a lot of us. It doesn't excuse her actions, she sounds like a cold heartless bitch, but scamming some dumb fuck, while evil, is hardly senseless.
If you wonder why I am being "mean to you" it's for your own fucking good, the last thing you need is a bunch of meaningless sympathy and hand holding which will only serve to keep you wallowing in your own goo, you need a slap across your face to "snap out of it" and as Bri said for you to "quit picking at the scab"
You're going to make sure he doesn't miss the point, aren't you?
I have thought a lot about your comment that if there was an apology then I would want to know why..... I think that is true however I think I also know the answer to the question of why.
She was greedy and loved money far more than she ever loved me. Why? Because she could.... she could take advantage of someone and gain money for doing it. No different than stealing social security checks, robbing a store, purse snatching, going through your wallet while you are in the bathroom, etc.... it is a moral issue.
So I think I know why, I really don't need that explanation. If she gave any reason for why I'm sure it would contain reasons/excuses for her behavior that had more to do with others and very little personal responsibility because that is the world we live in.
1. Quit picking at the scab
2. Get an awesome BJ
3. Spend 300000 on 1000 providers ...
and live happily thereafter!
I'm working on those today
I took your advice, I'm down to 999 and counting
I'm not tracking
What does your post mean?
By the way it sounds like that angry woman who "called BS" had decided to STFU it would seem
On monday I decided to take GAG advice and get 1000 Blowjobs with the next 300,000 I spend. By Friday I was down to 998 to go.....
It does seem as though she moved on, easy to do with anonymous handles
Oh okay that makes sense
I wonder if she had anything to do with all that you went through
Never mind that’s probably crazy
I don't think so but you never know.... there are some crazy people in this world
I think you can now vouch for the fact that "some" rudeness can actually be quite helpful. lol
I bet except for the missing money, by the time you get through even your first 100 Blowjobs, you'll barely even remember her name. I'll send you a bill for my professional services later. Fuck Dr Phil, Dr Gambler is in the house!!!
you got that tough love that comes with age and also been there done that, that comes with age. We all have to learn and I bet he learned a few lessons and it won't happen again.
Definitely won't happen again.... people in general are not to be trusted. You may be surprised at some of the crap that people have messaged me.... and the guesses at who she is.
I can't follow if you fell in love with a provider and got your heart broke or if an evil provider outted you to your wife and destroyed your marriage. Whew! What a mess. I would just hit reset and start all over.
just can just leave those mf'ing broken pieces on the floor and just walk away. what if you don't have to fix it or put the pieces back together. And just walk away. Follow your peace dude. Life is hard enough. Either people are with you are not aren't.
Thanks, that is what I was doing before someone came in and called BS
I'm done with the whole thing
bless you, sounds stressful and I wish you peace this year. Maddie