Pretty lame question don't you agree? Well, especially you ladies what question helps you relax as we are talking with you  during those sometimes awkward opening moments? We want you to relax, get to know you a bit without getting too personal or intrusive in and we could use some guidance. Be specific and not generic, What does it for you.
 For example, one lady I enjoy on many levels has a huge interest in those in the military and also the homeless. When I asked why she was so involved I learned that in her real world life she works in a medical environment with veterans. She also has a son in the military. Walking with her one afternoon in a beautiful west coast city I was stunned that she stopped, talked with and had a little gift for every homeless person we encountered.  
 The result was she opened a door that allowed me to see what made her "tick" and we developed a more relaxed relationship.
 What is for you? If you rescue animals, "why?" If you are studying astronomy, " what do you see in the stars?"
 You have so much more to tell us than we can find on your web page...tel us about yourself.  

 Perhaps the question is not all that lame?

My passion is Animals!! every Saturday afternoon..I go clean the cages at the Naples humane society
On my web site there are links to help save a life/homeless pets....and adoption.

I think if we "Give Back" ..more will come to us! if it is humans or animals...

What a great Question!!

Kisses...
Keri Diamonds Vi

it's a damn good thing that you are passionate about animals!  

Thank you. You have a PM

I am passionate about teaching orgasms to women over the age of 40 who have attached emotional anchors to their vaginas.
I am passionate about having men, who have had prostate surgery, recover their male power and performance.
I am passionate about Health. I am passionate about Orgasms for Health!

Just FYI, very little makes me feel more "put on the spot" or as though I've just been forced to do karaoke, than someone saying that to me.  It honestly feels very interview-like.  Which isn't something I particularly enjoy. LOL.  

But sitting on my couch with my furbaby cuddled up next to me while I type away, I'm relaxed enough to share a few things.  

I'm basically an introvert; and a somewhat nerdy & dorky one at that.   In large social situations, I'm very awkward & pretty much scared of my own shadow.  It's only one on one (and on the internet lol) that I have any confidence or grace at all.  
You know that song, "So much cooler online".... yeah, that is very much ME.

Which bring me to the second tidbit: I'm a Trekkie.  I even go to conventions and occasionally dress up.  I can ROCK a Seven of Nine catsuit!  

I'm an animal-lover and now have several senior dogs of varying breeds.  I used to volunteer with the Humane Society but I wanted to bring them ALL home with me.  Big, big softie for animals, strays of all kinds, and pretty much any sob story.  

Mom of 2 grown children with different cognitive/developmental/neurological & learning disorders.  

My parents are nudists and former swingers, which has undoubtedly had a huge influence on my own values & outlooks.  

I'm a very nervous, anxious person.  What some see as me being "controlling" or "scripted" is just my way of keeping enough order and routine in my life so that I can actually relax & enjoy the moment!  Anti-anxiety meds make turn me into a dopey zombie, so structure is the way to go for me.

What else?  Hmmmmmm..... I love to cook, bake, and make everything in my personal space beautiful!

Oh, and although I do work out, I hate it with a passion.  The only cardio activity I really enjoy is sexercise!

 
xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Nooner: A sexual encounter during lunchtime; especially one that is illicit

You are very lucky to have lady friends who trust you and your discretion to allow themselves the gift to share. Most of us ladies do live this pretty secretive life and are not going to open up to just anyone. There is one persona as an escort and a whole new world revolves on the other side.

I am very lucky to have long term gentlemen friends that know the true me, as I them. Shared many stories through our lives both good and bad. Given and gotten much advice and compassion. True friends and lovers with the understanding that sensual delights are reciprocated with an envelope although in the by-gone days you gave the gift after not before with out masking it. Trust was of the utmost importance

Kisses Haley

The guidance we are asking for is one that is intended to relax our companion and not be intrusive into her real world life. Re-read the post above. The writer has answered the question succinctly, but I am not sure exactly how to frame the question. I suppose I would be inquisitive on what makes her an introvert. I will ponder that for a while.
 The point is, the reader invited us into her world and shared an enormous amount of extremely interesting information that I would love to know more about. Makes me want to jump on an airplane and fly to Chicago today !
 Certainly respect, unchallengeable lines of privacy must be observed. I look at it from the perspective of wanting to give my companion a relaxing atmosphere, I am not looking to be one bit intrusive. Not necessarily an easy task  to accomplish, thus the reason for posting the question in the first place.
 Thank you for sharing your point of view, it is valued

Do you mean, what is the cause?  Or what are the identifying characteristics?

That's not boring. You sound like an interesting young woman. Wish I lived in Chicago...

In the context of asking probitive questions for the purpose of providing a relaxing atmosphere certainly the questions  would not be causative. Persuing that area would seem intrusive and in poor taste, neither being compatible with the objective. The conversation should be light, offering calm. By no means would I be compelled, even if I was compute the, which I am not, to
"analyse" anyone. However, I do find it interesting to learn about a characteristic of someone I am about to spend time with. Whether you are introverted or extraverted or somewhere in between makes you never more attractive because it reveals a little bit about you, but not to much. In that sense it is like lingerie. I like what I see  and I know what is underneath is even mo re intriguing! 😍
 But the premise of my original question was, I need guidance to ask the proper question. So, I ask you. What is the question that shows my interest hin providing you a relaxed atmosphere?

How often  we do look at stars? if anyone tried to cow them? If you was holding hands  and  was laying  down on the grass among flowers on the meadow and looking at stars in the dark dark southern sky waiting when star will slip down to the earth and you eb able to make a wish - at same time - with him?
 yet .. yet then you will get distracted form looking at night sky by his kisses and how he  takes off your blouse .. hugging you tighter and tighter.. pushing his manhood against you bellows so you start feel it and your breath becoming more heavy and you can t just breathe yet feeling your nipples  to start harder and your when he lifts your skirt  kissing you firmly - you both see staaarrrrssssss.. so many starrrssssss that you already can't count them and forget all your wishes - just wanting - THE one - his manhood? and his hands and his eyes ,, and you already  do not belong yourself.  And after all you still see stars in his eyes? Just do not say too much just look in to his eyes and know it all?

Why do I love poetry and why i do love music and  art and men? Because I I can not live with no love...
I  am Russian  now am American ..
Very very very surprised that in this country many want to be loved- not to love themselves.. ..
I want to love myself.... it is only when you love you your body produce those hormones..- not other way - not when you loved by someone and your body is not responding - you are alive when  you love YOURSELF  
 Then you are living - then you are alive .. then forces of the life keeping your body young healthy and active.
Love is all you need.

It is about me. There a lot more.. a lot more -

 I have so interesting experiences in my life that it would be enough on good novel and amazing movie.  

My interests are not limited to something stationary -I am easy to be inspired and taken by emotion.

In your post you did mention  homeless- I moved to NYC in 2011  from CO and before that I livd in Europe and Russia  

NYV homeless people still now- I can not use to that.. I just can not- what is interesting - it is totally different mood of this homeless people compare to CO ones- in CO they do smile and have hope- in NYC they die on the streets.

It is too much for me...your woman was able to give gift them - and you did mention - it was son west coast  

I think on eats coats - in NYC - it is more brutal.
Now I have  camera and taking videos of NYC life and people. It is my other passion - I see what others do not see-  
 for instance - last summer in Spain - I took a video of homeless man begging for money - and in Europe people beg for money on the streets in most uncomfortable poses - on their 4 and face down to the ground - to stay in such position for and hour and you be not able to walk- they  say all day ..
 so I took a video of  this homeless man - he was begging mo hey in front of the bank- it was in Spain- then when i looked at the video -  saw there was a advertisement on the bank windows
it reads

" manage your assets wisely"
What an irony .
I want to travel with camera and reflect reality of the life. .
In Copenhagen I shoot a movie of working woman working on the street - just as from old times -she was standing on the corner of busy street and stopping cars.
 In NYC I saw working women near hotels talking to strange type of men. .. In Moscow I saw a model as a mannequin standing on Tverskoy Bulvar next to the window of fashion store ..- she was just as a mannequin and not alive person ..

Why I love people and want to know their souls and how they do feel ?  
 I just feel them.
I actually have paranormal abilities to feel aura and to fix it and have strong energetic field which physics can feel and I few times I was told - that I can heal people.  
I do heal people who cross path of my life - have been told not once about my interesting abilities channel the energy to those who need it  yet -i never developed it on professional level - so it is my next project.

There so much to do in this life.. and see and share.

To learn, to know and to share - that makes me going - and that all just in sake of love.  
I love people

I see, said the blind man...... as he picked up his hammer and saw.  

 
So you're simply looking for ways to learn more about a person WITHOUT asking probing, personal questions?

It just has to happen naturally. One way is to share things about yourself, and hope that she chimes in with similar or related facts about HERSELF.

Keep in mind, though, that many of us have been conditioned NOT to go into any real length or depth so as to avoid being called "too talkative" or reading "she went on and on about herself" in a review.  

You also don't want to be perceived as being "too nosy" or a possible clinger.  

Just keep the tone of the conversation light; open about about you and she may reciprocate!

 
xoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxxooxoo

Nooner: A sexual encounter during lunchtime; especially one that is illicit

I feel Happier after reading this....  I LoVe you Pavliena!

According to a recent study, the more intelligent you are the fewer friends you want, need, or enjoy.  I don't recall if they said why, but I think it is because you selected for intelligent friends and the others actually bore you pretty quickly.

I am an introvert too. You won't ever find me talking about myself with someone I never met before and rarely will anyone at all. Had to overcome that in my career and now relish the fact I no longer have to Impossible to make someone comfortable when you are not.
 You do get the concept however and I appreciate your thoughtful responses. I think with someone like you it would be easier because you have so many interesting facets to who you are ( as stated in your initial post) that even the blind man would stumble upon the hammer and saw.
 Now I think I will check the flights to Chicago

END OF MESSAGE

I always say _ i want to love myself instead to be loved - i be dead if I would not love myself - I need it as air to breath. It is A chemistry which keeps  us alive and moving. As soon as Love is gone -  have trouble even to move -  
Money? can money make you happy ? Seems yes - yet- take all your money and go alone on the trip ..even if yo can buy any young woman you wish for  one eve.. yet you would go to bed alone in darkness with no love and no one needs you and no one remembers where you are - because you never LOVED people !!!  
OMG  
 I love you too  GYB  I will write later more!

Kissess and my touches to you you .. all over- feel it - I am now sending you my energy - take it - use it, burn it  for your warm.  Let it care you away and kiss your face your forehead .. your body - just relax and fly in  blue  and pink and and yellow  green light of my love .
 Have white cloud of pure peace around you - I gave it to you now to protect you.
 Stars and planets be later..

Theme song from a 1962 animated kid's show about a spaceship and crew.  The song is actually a love song

I  do not know American movies, songs.. cartoons- almost zero...  

So it was my pure line .. then at 1962 I was not even born yet..

I  do love Opera, shows, books ..and poetry art and music - I do own collection of classical music which I can listen more then a year  non stopping ..and lectures about all composers and biography of artists.. and writers ( last one- literature -- it was mandatory classes  as reading  and authors and critics in our schools - we read so much )

I am creative person  
An artists.. some say an actress - but that is fine - as long as I am not hand made Hollywood type of actress many would die for -
I am a Broadway type - charning warm, and engaging - I do care an aura around me which makes people notice me and look at me directly - I am glowing with love.  
Physics  stop me often on the street asking me if I am a healer...I need develop that. People who know me close- asking me to pray for them as everybody believes my prayers are answered. I can channel it.  
Help to  channel. But he / she has to opens up me ABSOLUTELY .

There is truly just 1 % of females are my personality type and only 5 % of  males .. yet at some other sources I can read that there is totally 1.3 % of all and male and female population has this personality type.
 
I think I am loosing my talents here on TER  
yet I am here because I love men and love  them .. love to share.love to know them - all about him.  
It makes me  very happy when I am meeting good person. It gives me meaning of living.
I must to meet good people Have them in my life.

Time to write a book and make a movie and travel world taking photos and talking to people  and paint - i do paint also.

 I am a woman and I love men..yet there no man who would hold me for making long - dust of the galactics make my head go dizzy and earthy roads holding so much to discover..
- I have to go. .. where  am going?
 What is t the  end of the road ?
 I would find out while taking the road..
 It would be nice to have someone to share this road-  
but so far there were only those who want to capture me and make me happy - even not asking  what happiness means for me ..

Ian sure gentlemen have been there as well - women say  
 "I will make you happy and gave you all as you want"
 
yet her assistant talks to you or she speaks her own ways .. and that is fine too - if you two can relate on those  united ways.

As for me - it is very very very hard to meet those with  whom I may unite. ... even for two hours...but my reviews gave me hope  in to male half of our planet .
 I was very lucky to meet amazing men here and I am proud of those men - as I am proud for myself. They are from Gold. The men. I do have allergy to all what is not Gold.
Someone may  to confirm

 
 

 

-- Modified on 4/24/2016 2:32:06 AM

I wasn't accusing you of plagiarism, just remembering an old song with outer-space and love as a theme.  Here is another one, though more of a social commentary (not that I understand the point of the lyrics.)

Yes, do not be indiscriminate in loving "people,"  it will only lead to disappointment and regret.  Be selective.

I suspect that being of Jewish ancestry you have a high IQ.  (Ashkenazi Jews have the highest average IQ in the world.)  TER doesn't claim to be MENSA.

A recent study found that high IQ people want, need and enjoy fewer friends.  I see from your posts that you search for good people, but find few long term.  So yes, I think your outlier status on the intelligence curve will make it difficult to find someone just right for you.  If you truly desire a long term relationship starting soon (not some distant future) you may have to pick one or two characteristics that are good enough, and settle for less perfection in the other characteristics.

History is full of women who searched their whole life for the perfect mate.   I'm not sure their story is happier than those who settled for a bit less than the perfect man.

hich may be never come to true.. for all hard work people do just for surviving.. and they are rare find themselves and as life goes they are loosing this inner child in them and becoming cynical.. not matter if they "Made it "( Have  money ) or they "Not made it" - working for a little to provide on table  
By the way in Russia we never have had this concept - you make it or  you do not make it  
 
word Loser I heard only in states for very first time.

I am very selective whom I am friend with here no need worry about me - people do think I am snobby - but I am just know what I can handle and what I can not absolutely .

You advice to me about long term relationship -  do not look for perfection- can be understood in many ways- Perfection for me does not mean that he is perfect .. Ian not naive girl - I am a woman with rich life experience- was married and have had amazing lovers in my life  Raised two wonderful famous kids  
 and yet kept this girlish looks and body and spirit.  
yet now I firm know how to avoid to be hurt.
I do not look for perfection - I do look in man in in relationship  ability to say myself, so he would understand me who I am - and would not try to change me yet would help me to do what I like to do.. person who would share  with me my passions and I be able to share his passions - so to speak we gave space to each other and rights to be individuals.  

As being Russian - you possibly even do not have idea what I went through with American men - those who do believe that they know better. teaching life, American customs and yet themselves never even were out to travel to other world cultures - or if they went out of states - they went in firm believe that Americans know it better  They call me  names.. they put me down with criticism - you, I think saw a post on board - GG again told me that I need hop plane to Russia .. and he never met me yet he feels that he has right to say so.

You said I need stop look for perfection? I am just looking for ability to stay alive and stay a person I am .
 Do not loose myself, my individuality my ability to love people and world. I do recover very very fast form any
offenses and any disappointments - as a plant - as mother nature- as a tree which  can t be killed by frozen winter.. every  year at spring it is again blooming ..
 You, possible know and yourself - you I am sure met those people  who can not overcome one - two personal disappointments in life - personal relationship went badly twice and those people  are damaged for the rest of the life mistrusting and not able to enjoy new ones - always bringing in to new - OLD  bad.poison.
I am not one of them  
 Even worth - in states I met so many people who keep and keep and keep talking about childhood abuse, some rape which took place 20 years ago .. and use it as an excuse  to loose their lives now - drinking, doing drugs .. not raising own kids - crying at age of 35 about childhood problems abandon her own child - yet have energy to party.  
Do I want to be around those and be friends with them?  
I am not snobby when I say - NO . I just do not have common interests. Why to spend life for nothing?

Any way .. by some reasons I want to share now one poem by Serg Esenin..It is long poem  
I love how he let his woman to be happy and without him in her life .. yet in states I hear lyrics of songs  
" I do not care where you from what you done AS LONG AS YOU LOVE ME " ..and when love is gone - man would make an attempt to DESTROY her. .. Not just in states .. you know opera and  “Manon Lescaut”.. so .. yo aid - do not look for perfection - I do look fro someone who would not destroy me as min yet help to build what I want to build.

"Letter to  a woman"
 
You remember,
Of course, you remember
How I stood
With my back to the wall
While you paced the room in a temper
And many a sharp word
Let fall.

You said:
It was high time we parted,
My mad life
Was torturing you
You’d work to do and had to start on it,
While I’d slide on down
To my doom.

Beloved!
You did not love me,
Didn’t you know: in the milling crowd
I was like a horse driven to fury
By spurs, and foaming at the mouth.

You didn’t know:
In the thick smoke,
In the turmoil of life swiftly spreading
What tortured me was I didn’t know
Where our ship of fate was heading….

Face to face
You can’t see the features.
You need distance to see what is great.
When the ocean surface is seething
The ship’s a pitiful state.

The earth is a ship!
But suddenly someone
Determined new horizons should be won,
Headed straight for the raging hurricane,
Streered the ship unswervingly on.

And was there a man among us on deck
Who did not stumble, start swearing and puke?
Few were the men of experience
Who stood their ground when all heaven shook.

Then did I too
In the terrible din,
Though knowing well what I was doing,
Go down into the hold of the ship
Not to witness the passengers spewing.

The ship’s hold was
A Russian tavern
And over a glass I bent low
So, by sight of woe not saddened,
I could go to the dogs
In a drunken glow.

Beloved!
I caused you heartache and pain.
Weary-eyed
On my antics you gazed,
Seeing me time and time and again
Wasting my talent on wild escapades.

But you didn’t know:
In the thick smoke,
In the turmoil of life that was spreading
What tortured me was
I didn’t know
Where our ship was heading….

In a different way I’m thinking, feeling.
When toasts are powered I rise and say:
“Praise be to the man who’s steering!”

Today by tender feelings impelled
Your grieving weariness I remembered
And now
I’m hastening to tell you
What I was then
And I am at present!

Beloved!
I’ve glad news of success:
I’ve not slipped down that slope so hazardous.
Now in the land of the Soviets
I am the keenest fellow-traveller.

I’m not the same chap
I was then.
You’ll have no cause, as before,
To cavil.
I’d gladly bear the freedom flag.
Of labour right to the English Channel.
Forgive me….
You too have changed, I know –
You have a husband
Who’s serious, clever;
You don’t need our old imbroglio
And you are better off
Without me altogether.

Live
As your own star has decreed,
To new destinations your way wending.
Greetings from one who shall ever esteem
Your memory,
S e r g e i    E s e n i

You are TER's resident poetess of life.

... don't forget this classic from 50 years ago.  Music is in the link if you want to sing to the music:

Beyond
The rim of the star-light
My love
Is wand'ring in star-flight
I know
He'll find in star-clustered reaches
Love,
Strange love a star woman teaches.
I know
His journey ends never
His star trek
Will go on forever.
But tell him
While he wanders his starry sea
Remember, remember me!

I really love when gentleman are thoughtful and actually want to get to know you in some way!

I enjoyed reading what Debbie had to say, because I am also shy in real life. Within the hobby, sometimes we have to seem extraordinary (which we are, of course) to gain the attention of people. But there's real beauty and wonder in the seemingly-mundane aspects of living.

Like I mentioned, I can be pretty shy. I am also super hilarious, love to crack jokes, and love to do it while watching competitive cooking shows haha! About food: food is my passion, what sustains me mind, body and spirit, my go-to god of all things. I love talking about it, cooking it, shopping for seasonal & sustainable ingredients at farmers' market, reviewing food at restaurants, etc. My grandmothers were chefs, so it runs in the family.

I literally geek out on food, history (American & British history), and music. My father was a musician, so I grew up listening to classic rock, doo-wop, soul, R&B from the 1950s-1990s, not to mention reggae and dancehall (my parents are British by way of the Caribbean). One of my early dreams was to be a music historian, so I can talk for hours about minute details on the Beatles and other popular rock groups. If anyone ever needed someone to attend a rock concert with, I'm definitely that person.

I also really care about the livelihood of people, and those with limited resources. I sometimes volunteer as an after-school instructor at a center near where I live. I was very fortunate enough grow up upper-middle class, and want to help other people meet their needs in some way.