Board's been quiet lately so here's a bit of humor that's been around for awhile.
The three stages of a man's sex life are said to be: Tri-weekly, try weekly, and try weakly. And maybe with today's available meds, number three doesn't apply as much anymore. But then there's the safety warning that if you pop one for four hours or more you should seek immediate medical attention. I'm not on the meds, but if I were to pop one for four hours I'm not going to see the doc, I'm calling in reinforcements. Gents and ladies, your thoughts about the three stages?
House sex - when you first get married and you do it in every room of the house.
Bedroom sex - after you've had kids and you have to limit it to the bedroom behind a locked door. Hallway sex - after you've been married too long and you pass each other in the hallway and say "Fuck you"
Then there's the old joke about a guy in his eighties being told that at his age it was normal to only have sex once a year. He starts smiling and his friend repeats what he just told him and asks why he is still smiling. He replies, "Tonight's the night!".
My sporting days are over, my pilot light is out. What used to be my sex appeal is now my waterspout. I used to be embarrassed, trying to make the thing behave. For every single morning it would stand and watch me shave. But now I'm getting older and it really gives me the blues to see the thing hang down my leg, and watch me tie my shoes.
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