...enjoy taking my time and getting to know the lady. I prefer the more familiar as you put it. I'm not always looking for what's new. I do want to see new ladies but it's to find out if they might be someone I'd like to see often. It is likely age that influences this and that I'm single. Different things are important as life goes by. This is what's important now. I like variety but when I find someone I like I want to explore all that there is to be had and to savor the many nuanced "flavors" (again using your word) of her.

Re: Do you sense the clock is ticking and it's time for change

I don't enjoy one-time sessions. Then again I never was into 'one-night stands' either. I can't even say why, it's simply what I experience.

I enjoy physical expression that is based on understanding the other person, in both giving and receiving. Maybe that is about volition or reason, or perhaps actually caring. I'm not sure how to say that without sounding sappy.

I cannot enjoy physical pleasure unless my partner does as well. A fantasy is not good enough in this. I have seen providers who I know for a fact did not find pleasure in our sessions. After the second session, I just could not go back, even when the provider requested that I return.

I don't think that is common amonght hobbyists, but I don't know. I also cannot hobby when I am in a serious relationship, for what that is worth in this context.

Havin a connection, building care and trust does not have to equate to "being in love" to me. I absolutely love one of my very best friends, a woman 20 years my junior. At times my feeling are so strong that I know I may be in love with her, yet I do not have the yearning to pursue that (even though she is single and would make an excellent partner), mostly because I am not the type of partner that she would do best with in her life. And so, I don not have desires for her sexually, but I do want to give her care as a close friend.

Sexuality is much better to me if I have developed a relationship with the person so that there is SOME level of mutual caring which can be expressed in sexual encounters. I find I can develop those feeling, and be able to express them, without them growing into the type of intense love I have for my best friend or I would have with my mate.

I am completely open to that sort of a relationship with a provider, if it were to happen, but I think it is rare, (I have no problems with having a provider as a mate, either) and I am not searching for that either.

This leave my approach to be to have multiple sessions with a provider if after that first two, there is some measure of connection, repore and trust that enhances out time toghether. There is usually a time however, after a few sessions that plateau (which is fine) that is followed by a decline in that connection. At that point it is time to move on.

Just this month I started in an sugardaddy/sugarbaby arrangement, during which i will not see other providers. This relationship will never go past this point as she is a single mom, "dancer", 30 years my junior. The reason I am doing this is that we actually have incredible fun together when we are not BCD. So there is a level of connection that brings a personal aspect BCD that is something important to me.

That's all I am looking for when it's time to play.


HH

Most of the gals I see are repeats, whether local or traveling gals I have seen before and enjoyed enough to want to see whenever they come to town.

But I also make it a point to check out new gals who, for whatever reason, something about them appeals to me.

I take my time determining who I am going to spend time with, most of my encounters are very good to excellent. There are some ladies that I would like to repeat with but I just can't seem to get my calendar aligned with theirs. Also, there are times when a new lady surfaces and I just want experience her in person after seeing her pics and reading some of her posts and reviews.

I have only been in the hobby for a bit less than a year so my sense is I have not been around this long enough to get jaded. I definitely look for a connection rather than the more "buffet" style of hobbying. I guess I am just a silly romantic...Sandy

Not sure really

I thought I had a connection to a lady and believed her and the complements and fun and all.  Then poof she shut me down like a broken pair of high heels.  

Now I am getting close to another but have a hard time believing the kind words.  So I stay very guarded.  Sometimes I think its all about Benjamin.  But she is breaking me down. It would be nice to know that she enjoys our times together.