Newbie - FAQ

How to trim the garden?
homersimpson085 2 Reviews 2733 reads
posted

This is probably one of the dumbest questions, but do I just get a pair of scissors and hack away? Or is there some thought/method to the process? Any downsides to trimming, i.e does it grow back thicker?

I used to have a beard and use a beard trimmer with a trim guard that allows you to adjust the length of the hair. Highly recommend. Now, I actually shave everything smooth, boys and all. I use a sensitive shave cream and a very good razor, high quality like a schick quattro (do not use cheap disposables as the irritation will be severe).  Rub shaving cream on the sensitive areas after you shave.  Also, I use an in shower moisturizer to sooth the burn.  My results are a very smooth shave, feels really good. Downside is when the hair grows out a little and you itch. Also, touching up the shave is tricky as I have shaving bumps that get knicked so I actually shave on the day of a date and touch things up 3-4 days later.

I keep mine short, but not shaved. I find it more comfortable during the heat and humidity of summer and it isn't too conspicuous to others who might ask if I was shaved.

I try to keep the sac trimmed as close as possible.

I use a little electric beard trimmer, and baby powder to make things work more easily. A comb and scissors works fine too.

I did that once.  It was a big ouchie!

There are actually some razors (called personal groomers) out there on the market which are supposed to work nicely.  Take a look at your drugstore.

If you've never done it, take your time.  Also it will depend on what you are going for - kojacking the boys is different than just trimming things up.

For trimming just get a small pair of cosmetic scissors sit facing backwards on the toilet and carefully clip away to desired length.

Once you do that you may notice that briar patch covers a lot of area and may want to go onto the next step...edging and cleaning up the stalk.

Get a new razor, or replace your disposable - you definitely don't want a dull razor for this job.  I would recommend something like Gillette Fusion.  Hop in the shower, some folks use shaving cream but you can use a moisturizing soap as well, lather up....more the soap the better.

Before you start have an idea of how much you want clean up because once you start you atleast want it to be even.  Work from the sides in  and from the to down up until the briar patch is what you want.  Now the tricky parts, the sack and shaft....take your time and use lots of soap.  Gonna sound weird, but the best way to do the sack is to grab it and stretch it out so you're shaving relatively flat surface.  This will lead to a closer shave and less chance for nicks...which would suck.

The last step is the shaft, soap up, get some blood flowing down there, but not too much.  Pull up from the base to make sort of a tee pee at the base, make sure your well lathered and shave from top down.  Take your time and go all the way around - be f'in careful on the underside due to that line of skin we all have.

Rinse and check - you may need to go back over some areas.  After you get out, after shave balm feels great, but if you are going on a date you may want to forgo it.

If you're really adventurous you can clean up the backside...




I have been using a razor called the Schick Silk Effects and I have never been cut. It has these little wires on it that cover the blade and stop any loose skin from getting caught.

I use the Norelco Body Groom, which was recommended on TER some time ago.  It has three combs that you can use to trim to short, medium or longer, or you can use it without the comb to be clean shaven.

I am quite hairy, so I trim up everything with it, but my face and head.  One of the younger ladies that I saw was a bit shocked when she saw how hairy I was, so I had to take some action.

Did you give her your best Chewbacca roar?

Rrrrrraaaaawwwwwrrr!

Posted By: electech
I use the Norelco Body Groom, which was recommended on TER some time ago.  It has three combs that you can use to trim to short, medium or longer, or you can use it without the comb to be clean shaven.

I am quite hairy, so I trim up everything with it, but my face and head.  One of the younger ladies that I saw was a bit shocked when she saw how hairy I was, so I had to take some action.

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