The best make-up sex... The two of you have had an argument. You are still mad, but he's not-and he wants to make up by making love. Fat chance. You cross your arms in front of your chest and stand firm,unmoved by the tender kisses he attempts to plant on the back of your neck. "How could he think he's getting sex now?" You wonder. You're not alone: In a poll on Redbook's website, 72 percent of female respondents said they withhold sex from their husband when they fight.

Maybe you should open your arms and embrace your man instead of pushing him away. Making love is not an admission that you're wrong and he is right. It is an acknowlendgement and a celebration of the love you shore even in times of discord. "If you can be angry at your partner one minute and arounsed by him the next," says Diane Andoscia Urso; a couples therapist in New York, "You've got a vital and healthy relationship."

I know, I know; You're worried that if you make love after a fight, he'll think he's won-that in his mind make-up sex means never having to work things out. Not so, say the experts. If he is thinking about the argument at all, he is probably thinking, "If we're making love,it means she still loves me," not "I win, she loses."

"He is not using sex to distract you," says Urso. "He's reaching for you out of love and a need for acceptance. Ten minutes after the shouting, he is already past the argument. Women hold on to anger longer than men do. We could learn from them how to let go."

Besides, what earthly good does it do you to withhold sex? You don't get your own sexual needs met, you cut yourself off from intimacy with your patner, and you perpetuate a climate of ill will that encourages more fighting. Lovemaking is a way for the two of you to reconnect on an intimate level, whether or not you're resolved your dispute. (Susan Crain Bakos)

Back home in south Florida this week. want your attention.  ) Thanks for reading. xoxoxo. Lilly (954) 557-3303