The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback..
He had scouted all the colleges
and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene
in the West Bank .
In one corner of the background,
he spotted a young Israeli soldier
with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand-grenade
straight into a 15th story window
100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade
75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another
at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!"
Coach said to himself.
"He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States
and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants
is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone,
"I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old woman says. "You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand,
Mother," the young man pleads.
"I've won the greatest sporting event in the world I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment,
there are gunshots all around us.
The neighborhood is a pile of rubble.
Your two brothers were beaten
within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"
The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!" ”
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback..
He had scouted all the colleges
and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene
in the West Bank .
In one corner of the background,
he spotted a young Israeli soldier
with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand-grenade
straight into a 15th story window
100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade
75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another
at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!"
Coach said to himself.
"He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States
and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants
is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone,
"I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old woman says. "You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand,
Mother," the young man pleads.
"I've won the greatest sporting event in the world I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment,
there are gunshots all around us.
The neighborhood is a pile of rubble.
Your two brothers were beaten
within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"
The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!" ”
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback..
He had scouted all the colleges
and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene
in the West Bank .
In one corner of the background,
he spotted a young Israeli soldier
with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand-grenade
straight into a 15th story window
100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade
75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another
at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!"
Coach said to himself.
"He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States
and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants
is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone,
"I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old woman says. "You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand,
Mother," the young man pleads.
"I've won the greatest sporting event in the world I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment,
there are gunshots all around us.
The neighborhood is a pile of rubble.
Your two brothers were beaten
within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"
The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!" ”
Still funny nonetheless.
Better reading that what passes for conversation around these parts of late.
The lefties here are so gleeful watching Trump struggle that they can't see any of the warts all over their own candidate. The Clinton machine, so far at least, has done it's job. Every scandal that should have brought down Hillary in any other election cycle are forgotten about and swept under the rug beneath the clamor for Trumps head for remarks made as a private citizen. Bill Clinton(who I voted for and would have voted for again over either Hillary or Trump today, given the option) DID what Trump only talked about doing, but no one seems to care that Hillary made it her life's mission to destroy those women for the sin of being one of her husbands victims.
Yes, I will take your recycled joke any day.
Glad you did! Made my day!
Thanks!